How many parties have you been to where you have seen a woman that you are attracted to, wanted to talk to her, but left without saying a word, or even meeting anyone new? At the same time you might have noticed a guy who didn’t look like anything special, but who worked the room like a pro, and even took a moment to grab the number off YOUR girl! I’m going to give you a few very simple steps which will allow you to rock up to the party and practically take it over, all without drugs, excessive alcohol, or years of extraversion training.
Step 1 – Establish a base
When you pick up women at a party, you need to immediately establish a “base”. Before you get a drink, hang up your jacket, or go to the bathroom, look around the room and pick a friendly looking group or individual and go over with the goal of having a very short conversation. Ask them how they know the host, ask how many people are expected, it doesn’t matter. Have a short conversation, get their name(s), and then if you have nothing else to say, make your excuse to leave and go get that drink, hang up your coat or whatever else.
Step 2 – Work the room
Work the room. When you get your drink, talk to people in the vicinity “interesting selection”, “what are you drinking”, “free booze, gotta love it”, “don’t they have any Cristal ’96? ;-)” Make a comment like one of these, introduce yourself and get their name, and small talk as long as you are comfortable. Don’t miss an opportunity to have an interaction like this – at a minimum cheers people and introduce yourself.
Now that you are “socially loose” and know a few people in the room, we are ready to pounce and get the girl.
Step 3 – Mingle with friends
When you see the girl you are interested in, see who she is with and either use the same methods to meet them. Ask who the friends are and be introduced and you’ll be talking to the woman you are interested in with no hard work. The second option is to approach her directly just like all the other people you have met. The difference is, you aren’t the weird guy standing in the corner watching her all night, you are the sociable guy who is meeting everyone and making sure they are okay. Almost like the host might. She’ll be warm and receptive.
Step 4 – Go for the close
Closing the deal. At a party, there is no harsh rejection, no bitchiness, so you don’t need to lay it all on the line or go for broke, smoothness is the key. If she is at a party, chances are she likes parties. Tell her that you go to some really cool parties and she should come one time, bring her friends too, they seem cool. Okay, so now all that’s left is to say “okay cool, put your number in my phone and i’ll text you next time something’s going on”.
So there we have it. We’ve been sociable without any effort, and made meeting the “hot chick” as simple as talking to a mutual friend. We’ve also found a nice low-pressure way to wrap things up.
I personally think picking up women at a party or gathering is easy after a few time, I’d love to know your thoughts on this, what works for you? Have you used my tips? Let me know….
After reading your book and reading this post I love your idea that sex has to happen just once as quickly as possible so that you're both comfortable around each other. It goes against what a lot of other people say but it suits me well.
All this focus on parties and clubs – that's not real life. I live in DC, and there are no clubs of the kind you see on The Pickup Artist. There are basically (1) lame places with 10 barstools where old people go with their friends and don't talk to anybody else, (2) redneck hangouts, and (3) rave-like places with lots of women, where the music is so loud that any pickup that relies on speech is hopeless.
As to parties, they barely exist once you're out of college.
Cool technique!
I applied something like this at aparty once, but instead, as the host told me the mood was sort of "for pick up" y went straight and direct. When all the girls arrived, y was just chilling and one HB walked right next to me and looked at me, and smiled at my hat, y smiled back and said: Hello!, kiss her on the cheek as a greeting, and started talking. Blablabla, comment comes comment goes, #close. I´m still a completely AFC, but in a House party, is sort of implied that you are there to meet new people. Is like Mystery Says: If all you say is "Hi", you win ;)
dude, this is basic digits 101 not leaving the party with a chick/picking someone up. Come on man I expect more from a Pick-Up-Artist……
Hey cool piece. The only problem i have is getting it from conversation to kiss closing? What should i do?
Well i read this after the party, so it didn't worked at all for me.
But there's a thing, i gone to a "Coming out party" and i was going to dance with one of the hottest girl in the place, in the first moment i introduced myself to her and her sister, we talked a little bit and them i left them, spent the night with my friends.
I didn't dance with her, but i also noticed that she wanted to looking at the body language and to her eyes.
Noticed about her perfectionism and other qualities, but couldn't talk to her.
Well, now she came after me.
Apparently what you said was right, you need to make yourself be seem as the host, even when you're not. And of course, use your killer look to fix your image in her head.