What Could Have Been
Leave a Comment (9) » | Posted in Uncategorized |
Imagine two sisters who are born joined at the face. One sister is staring directly into her twin’s face; after seperation, her face will be a blank mask, with no eyes, no real nose, and only a gap for a mouth. The other twin, though, is facing half away; after seperation, with one eye missing and one cheek in ruin, her profile from the other side looking perfectly normal. Which sister will suffer more?, the one who will never see how hideous she is, will never look at others looking away from her? Or the one who, by turning her face just so, will catch a glimpse of how beautiful she and her sister could have been; and then, by staring at herself full in the face in the mirror, could see just how hideously deformed she is?
This as a metaphor applies to many situations one can be in. Male or female. Is ignorance bliss? Or is that glimpse of what could have been, as torturing as it is, an important life lesson?
Idea taken from top science fiction writer Orson Scott Card.
Wooooow, really got me thinking, i use to think in this kind of stuff all the time, and is really impressive is that i was talking just about this a second ago with another player friend of mine, about how i can hardly remember the days when i thinked “men, no girl will ever love me, i have no social skills, im not atractive enough” and stupid things like that, and now i have an inner game that goes roof top and beyond, an ego that i can´t hold and confidence in myself to share, i think that´s the “beautiful” part in me, or in any Pua, the part that we constantly try to reflect in that mirror, but there is that hideous side, the side when we were this AFC´s, afraid of women, and if we had one, too afraid to loose her, cause of the fear to not be able to find someone else, that is a heavy chain and ball, but we are lucky that is not a physicall side that one, is only on our mind and we can change it, we can become whoever we wanna be, live the life that we wanna live, and that´s what makes us winners, alphas, puas.
POKER
I think anyone who gets into this game has already seen their hideous side, the inner game or weak mental though, as the poster above said.
But as you get more in depth into the field, and perfect your skills, it seems like the ignorance aspect comes out more and more. As you approach women, you really have to have this “non-reactiveness” approach to life. You cant care about outcomes or how women react. This is some sort of ignorance, as you plow your way through and show that confidence in yourself.
So it kind of seems that if sister in the story living the life without eyes will live a better life. You kind of see this in real life when you spot some mentally challenged kids who “don’t know any better”. Some of those kids live their lives as happy as ever.
But nobody here wants to be that mentally challenged kid. We all want to be rockstars and control our destiny. So its important to look at the hideous side of us and say to ourselves, “thats how i could have ended up… lonely and whatever..”.
Instead of falling into the trap and only looking at what we “could be” and saying we will never attain it because we don’t have the skills, looks, patience, whatever.
At some point or another, we all need to embrace what we don’t like about ourselves.
We shouldn’t go on for the rest of our lives trying to ignore our weaknesses. We should confront our issues and deal with the ones we can and accept the ones we can’t alter.
or maybe they’ll both find bliss in reading intergalactic space novels about deep senseless nonsense.
for real though, interesting question, but i just wonder if thinking about it will get us anywhere.
i will say i agree with vega, about how you do begin to plow through with this feeling of ‘endless confidence’. but vega, do you think its because your ignorant or because you actually know the truth behind all the fake surface?
interested to know what you think brother.
It’s a bit like the old question: who suffers more, the person born blind, or the person who loses their sight later in life?
The first person never got a chance to see the world at all, but the other hand the second person knows how it was and had it all taken away.
Is ignorance bliss? You might be happier if you don’t see how things really are, but would you really be better off? I don’t think so.
It’s not all about happiness. Most people would rather be an intelligent person dissatisfied than an imbecile who’s happy. What’s important isn’t just blind happiness, it’s having a deeper, more authentic, more real understanding of how things are, and facing reality – the good and the bad – and taking it in your stride. It might not make you happy, but at least you won’t be living a lie.
So to answer your question in that somewhat roundabout way, I’d actually say the girl who knows what happened to her would be better off. You can read into whatever implications that might have for game yourself.
For me, the biggest fear was in seeing my weaknesses upon entering the community.
It’s very very hard to accept that theres something wrong with you, despite knowing beforehand that there was something wrong with you in the first place.
Game brings out your insecurities, your imperfections and your weak traits. This is no doubt, a bitter pill to swallow for the most of us when first starting out. But what makes the real difference is having the strength, drive and determination in standing up and taking charge of it.
This is what makes PU so great, because it not only teaches you a skill to pick up women, but also teaches you to love yourself despite your imperfections and insecurities.
Hey Onder, Your post Struck a chord with me mate.
The first time I was reading PU material, I was really pissed off at myself, for what I had done in the past! Reading game material made me realise that I wasn’t perfect, that any past relationships I had that broke up were MY FAULT!Not hers, It was MY FAULT! Because of my behaviour and bad habbits! This was hard to swallow for me as I had in my head always shifted the blame away from me.
Now any problem I stare it in the face and become a better person for it. I really admire guys who can go from a shyy quiet guy, to a guy with options. Shows a lot of balls!
Nice post Onder, never again will I think “what could have been” because I have the tools in my life now to do what I want to do!
Cheers, Noel
You know? About that weakness you talk about that you were afraid to show into the comunity, that can be a powerful tool too when sarge, at least in your first days into this, I have a lot of time trying to find out how to seduce women, and i tried all type of things, books, smells with “feromones”, pick up lines, going out with “naturals”, sarging by myself, untill i tried this pick up stuff, i found some puas on my city and i went out with them, i had just read “The game” by Neil strauss, so i was under the impression that every pua was picking up like 20 or 30 girls in one night or something, so i went out with this pua´s group, they were like 6 of them and that was my first night, i felt on an initiation exam or something, we went to the bar and i was so afraid to show that ugly side in my, the side with the insecurities, aproach anxiety, and all that crap, that i started to open and apply all the stuff i knew like crazy, so i ended up with 15 solid numbers, the feeling was great, even more when i saw that the other guys didn´t even open more than two sets or something like that, im not saying im the biggest pua around or anything, just that this “ugly side ” could be a real powerful thing to push you further than you ever thought!
POKER