PUA Training Blog

For my first year in the game, I made a mistake, or at least I could have done something a lot better… I left myself vulnerable.  I’d go out gaming and i’d meet girls.  Sometimes i’d get into a short relationship and really fall for a girl.  Then things wouldn’t work out and sometimes i’d get hurt and i’d go back to zero.  Zero meaning I had no prospects, and i’d have to go back to the drawing board - going out with PUAs gaming for girls.  It meant there were real highs and lows.

Now I still have the highs but I don’t have the lows.  I’m insulated from the bad stuff.

So what’s different now? I have some very good non-PUA friends who I enjoy spending time with.  Having non-PUA friends means going out just to have fun vs just going out to “game”.  I have lots of female friends.  People can support me if I need it, people can raise my mood if I need it.  I also have lots of options.  I can come out of a relationship and there are a bunch of girls who i’ve kept in touch with lightly on facebook or meeting now and again and they are girls that I can date and meet with.  This means I never go back to zero anymore, even the worst that can happen isn’t so bad.  I’m definitely never going back to my Cambridge days and i’m never even going back to the me of a couple years ago.

As another benefit to this lifestyle, things go bad less often.  Female friends give you better game, a good social life brings a good state most of the time and gives you better game, cool friends who have great qualities give you better game because you model their skills.   Because you have more going on and more power over your situation you are less likely to be week, needy or have one-itis.  You keep the girl because your behaviour and lifestyle is attractive.

So there it is, but how do you get there?  For me, all that I needed to do was shift my perspective, I didn’t need any more tricks or techniques.  I just decided that if I met any girl that I enjoyed talking to I would “friend close” her, if I met a cool guy or even saw one in the club I’d be friendly and make a connection.  It took literally a couple of nights to get a social cirlce of a few key people which has stayed with me ever since.   You can apply game in many ways and going for sex is the narrowest possible application of what really is a “social skill”.  The wider application brings for a great lifestyle, great friends, better game, AND even more sex! If you are in the situation I used to be in, I hope this helps.  If you are just learning game, change your course slightly to incorporate the above.

-G

Hey Guys,

I recently ran a little caption contest on my Facebook profile. It was a lot of fun and we got some really interesting responses! Check out the picture and comments below, they’re pretty good… think you can do any better?

Got a caption?

A Few of the Facebook Captions:

Richard Gambler wrote
Guys, I think we should have a caption competition on this one. The best caption can have some kind of prize…a free pass to the Super Summit or a product if you are out of the UK!

Mark wrote
“My god!!!! did you brush your teeth before you came out tonight?”

Jarel wrote
I did NOT shave my chest…

Shaun wrote
Look, its my hook, line and sinker smile!!!

Marin wrote
“what u don’t take it in the stink”

Caspar wrote
Girl: “I’m actually a man.”

Akin wrote
Girl: Look, I must confess; I am actually a pick-up artist and teach girls how to get guys

Richard: *Match made in heaven!*

Allan
Girl: “So Richard, when did you say Allan will come back to London?”

Jakub wrote
Richard thinking: I hope that’s her keys in her pants….

Andy wrote
a leg cocked up and a contorted face? he tried to squeeze out a quiet one…

Rezar wrote
i don’t know who’s going win but it’s clear, allan and adam have lost

Jago wrote
“Hell, i’ll just wing this one”

Joe wrote
to Richards shock…….the tooth fairy loved his new gothic style bedroom…

Hiten Pabari wrote
Woa, Im not that easy, take it slow!

Jaoued wrote
Btw, it’s hard to get! WTF did you just told me you just like the new season of sex in the city ?

Hàmza wrote
Girl: i’m on my period at the moment

Sarthak wrote
Richard : hey! stop tickling! iT wont get ur DAD free PUA training lessons! or it cud be..

Girl: eey richie boy is that paris hiltons TATTOO down onYa chest!??

Mike wrote
Passes to get into the club: $35

Fairy Wings as a Peacocking Item: $12

1 Bottle of Cabernet: $45

Having an emotional waterfall dumped upon you because she thought you where gay after seeing you peacocking the fairy wings:
Priceless

If You Haven’t Added Me Already…

As well as keeping my profile updated with more than 200 pictures (Lots of HBs) and running the odd little contest like the one above, I also keep track of my day-to-day pick up adventures on there. My profile has over 300 comments and they’re packed with questions, tips and techniques… I’m sure you’ll find plenty on there to interest and help you.

The above competition is now closed, but If you’re interested in who won or you just want to read the rest of the captions (there are some really funny ones!), check out my profile.

If you haven’t added me yet, click here.

GAMBLER

We were featured on Canal + in France as we transformed a student over a few days.

Super dragueurs - partie 1/4

Super dragueurs - partie 2/4

Super dragueurs - partie 3/4

Super dragueurs - partie 4/4

Not every PUA is the same, not only do they have different gaming styles, but they also have different agendas:

1.   The guy that wants to be good for himself, to satisfy a need for women in his life.  He probably wants a true connection with one girl and a better social life generally.

2.  The guy that wants to get revenge on all the women who dumped and rejected him, to prove his friends wrong, to get back at the world that held him down for so long.  Each “notch” is a point won for mankind against those evil women and the anti-me society.

3.  The guy that wants to be a master of the art of pick up, just like an actor, a painter or anything else, he wants that deep understanding and it’s more about the art than the actual results.  (note - 2 guys on the team fall into this category!)

4.  The guy that does it for status with men.  He posts on message boards, he brags, he’s thinking about telling the story when he’s fucking the girl, about writing the lay report when he’s persuading her to come back to the house.  His validation comes from men who look up to him for his exploits.  Emotion and relationships and connection is never present and he treats women like shit.  Damn him!

Guys, steer yourself in the right direction.  Love women.  You’ll be a lot more normal, happy AND successful if you do.

At some point in your development you will say “shit i’m changing, do I really want to CHANGE WHO I AM???”  This is normal and is actually a good thing.  You aren’t changing your core personality.  I’m still the same guy - I like a tight group of close friends, I don’t like socialising too much, and I still have a lot of my introvert qualities.  I didn’t become loud and brash.  Every change that has happened in me i’m happy about, it’s a layer of skills and a filling of gaps.

At some point you might also say “Shit, this stuff i’m doing is really weird!  Sarging?  HBs?  Targets?  2-set? WTF?”.  Again, don’t worry, this stuff IS WEIRD, but you won’t be doing it for long.  To accellerate the learning you need to go at it hardcore for a short time.  Go out a lot, be weird, hang out with other “weird” PUAs and imrpove your game.  USe canned openers, do palm reading even though you think it’s bullshit.  Think of it like going to university, you don’t go for your whole life, get what you need and leave.  It almost feels like PUA should never be a permanent title but only one you adopt for a short time to get the skills you need.  Then you leave “PUA University” and apply them in your social life to devastating effect.

Improving in game should be fuelled by a desire to fill a gap in your life, to add the skill of getting women.  When it’s filled, it’s filled.  When you can get dates with the girls you want, you are all set. I used to want revenge on the people at school who bullied me, on the teachers that said I was an idiot, and on the girls who called me ugly (especially the one who asked me out on April Fools’ day!).  I used to want to be the best PUA to show all the other so-called Gurus who got the hottest girls with the most natural game.  Fuck that, you will know when you have made it because that stuff won’t matter to you.  When you are so internally validated, so content with the person you are, these things will be meaningless.

If you are reading this and you want to be better with women, think about where you want to be, visualise it clearly, and you’ll be a step closer to getting there.  The guys that made it aren’t special like Olympic athletes.   They are just regular guys that worked hard, had the right attitude, and took action even if it was scary.  Not hard right?  So get to it, start now by doing something you know would be good for you but you haven’t had the balls to do!

I’m planning to do some video interviews with attractive women and ask them all the burning questions that guys have. I’m going to get to the bottom of things, understand the female mind, and get insight that will help us in the dating game. I’ve come up with some questions and i’d love to hear if you have any that you’d like me to include:

You gave me your number, when should I call or text?
Does persistence work, or is it better to ignore you for a bit then try again?
Why wouldn’t you like to see me again after a date?
When you are single and going out and giving your number out, how many guys are likely to be texting, calling, dating you?
You gave me your number but didn’t respond when I texted or called, how come?
How does one of them stand out?
When a guy approaches you, how would you order these factors - technical good looks, fashion, energy/vibe, opening line?
At what point do you make the decision that you are sexually attracted to a guy?
Do you assume that a guy is only after one thing, a liar, a player or do you give him the benefit of the doubt for a while?
When should a guy go for the kiss?
Should a guy say “I love you” first?
Do you think it’s okay to meet a guy in a club?
If you come back to a guys house at night when it’s just the two of you, does that mean you have already decided to sleep with him?
If you are attracted to a guy and want to sleep with him, what makes you hold back sometimes?
Do most guys go for the kiss too soon or too late?
Do they do it in the right way?
Are guys generally too sexual or not sexual enough?
When you are with your friend in a bar and a guy approaches who you like what’s the best way for him to handle the situation (ignore your friend, be nice, quickly get your number, stay a while)?
What’s the best compliment a guy can give you?
Describe your ideal pick up.

Guys, give me some more!

The Short-Cut To PUA Mastery

During an 8-hour intensive, closed door workshop, you’re invited to the ‘inner sanctum’ of the PUA World…

The number of calls and emails from people wanting another Super Summit kept growing and growing…

And with good reason.

The last two super summits produced instant results for our attendees. They went home with their brains kicked into overdrive on the express train to dynamite game.

Guys left in a euphoric state. For them, life would never be the same.

Well after nearly three months of deliberation, it’s official. We’re holding another Super Summit training.

And it’s going to put the last two to shame.

http://www.puatraining.com/super-summit/

Everyone who orders in the first 72 hours will receive a free phone coaching session with one of our master trainers.

We will review your sticking points, go over the material covered in the super summit, and develop an action plan for you to take into the field with you. This bonus alone could be worth more than the entire seminar with you. Because nothing beats one on one time with a master pickup coach.

Read more about the Super Summit taking place on 29th November 2008 in London, UK.

Guys, it’s been a real long time.  Way back in  2007 I wrote this
series of posts:
http://www.puatraining.com/puablog/?s=%22Evolution+of+a+pua%22

As usual when I look back at things from a while ago i’m slightly embarassed.  I’ve changed a lot.  Still it’s good stuff but what the hell has happened in the past 18 months?

Well, I left off around January 2007.  T
his was a few months into the serious business, we’d left behind the old website:
http://web.archive.org/web/20060719014731/http://www.puatraining.com/
and we were hiring more staff and getting more customers.

Personally it was getting more interesting. I’d gotten back from my holiday with Steve in the summer of 2006 and I had 3 major additions to my game:

(more…)

**Update - Blog comment free bootcamp competition winner will be announed tomorrow, I need a little more time to make this tough decision!**

I wanted to write a post about the early stages of relationships, i’m talking about the time after you get the number and before the point where you can relax and say “okay she’s mine” where she answers all your calls and is happy to see you all the time.

An important thing is this phase is keeping your attractiveness and making sure your emotional investment in her doesn’t exceed what she feels for you.  If she sees that you like her more than she likes you, it can kill attraction.  It would be pretty straightforward but women often throw curveballs at you in this phase and it’s easy to make a few mistakes and lose a potential relationship.

The situation:  You’ve met them and had this amazing time, the connection is great and she is very into you.  She gives tonnes of IOIs and you think you are very much in there.  You look into each others’ eyes and feel the sexual tension and your feelings growing.  Then you part ways.

(more…)

Hey Guys,  I think the team are doing a fantastic job of providing great  content for you guys.  We have 15 or so trainers who will be posting on the blog every week.  We’re loving your comments so keep them coming.  Here’s some personal, business, and miscellaneous updates for you:

-Rory sent me a link to this cool article, it’s a great one for guys who might have limiting beliefs about sex: http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sea/561877622.html

-After having a girlfriend for the past 3 months, I’m single again!  Last week I was out until 7am 3 days in a row.  I’m going to be playing very hard for a few weeks.  Best way to stay in touch with my results is by making friends with me on Facebook - I put pictures from my parties (there are hundreds on there), write on the wall, and generally give an insight into what i’m up to:  http://www.new.facebook.com/people/Richard_Gambler/1051139103   Facebook has a limit on the number of friends I can have so i’ll have to lock this profile at some point soon!

Some guys on the team like to be players.  I have been a player at times in the past couple of years, but I actually prefer having a girlfriend.   My feeling is that i’m super busy with the business, and i’m very fussy with the kind of girls I like.  I don’t get the same buzz from a 1 night stand as I do from forming a special bond with a special girl.   So, i’m looking for that special girl, I know what I want, it’s just a tall order.  Anyhow, in the meantime, there’ll be a lot of “auditions” for this role on the casting couch!

-I was talking to Adam & Amanda just now and we planned a couple of things including a “Female Trainer bootcamp”.  Amanda has been leading our global bootcamps with Adam, Kezia is our longest serving team-member, Angel gets some of the best reviews of any trainer, Natalia is back in town after a 3 month holiday, Marina is fantastic on her 1on1s.  Basically we realised we have a killer team of female trainers and they can easily put on an event that would be TOTALLY UNIQUE.  It’ll be a 1 off and i’ll announce it formally at some point soon.

-Great comments on my “Cambridge video” on youtube, thanks guys!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxmyO0q9_Gg.   Please write some requests for what you’d like to see from us in terms of videos and we’ll deliver them!

-We are working on a complete site re-design which should be live in a month or so.

-My “Gambler” nickname comes from when I used to trade the stock market every day for 6 years.  I still watch the stock market although I haven’t traded for a long time.  It’s better to read financial press than mainstream because it has a lot less spin on it.  Anyone that is wondering what’s going on with credit crunches and whatever else can read great articles like this one: http://www.minyanville.com/articles/credit-crunch-fannie-fnm-freddie-fre/index/a/18876

Today the stock market is getting absolutely crushed.  There will be bargains to be had at some point in property, the stock market, and many other places, but it’s probably still a little early!

-in 30 mins i’m off out to a club called Mahiki, it’s about the only place you can go to on a Monday in London.  If you want guestlists for these places I recommend Facebook groups.  I’m going with Angel, and Richard M is bringing our latest residential who has flown over from Holland.  He has AA and wants to be able to N, K, and F-close by the end of the week.  Should be fine.  One of the biggest determinors of success seems to me to be attitude.  Having fun with it, enjoying the process, and taking what you can from anyone who has a skill you respect is the best way to learn.  After 2 years of seeing residentials progress over 7 days, this is my number 1 success predictor.

Most guys will become more attracted to a girl when she plays hard to get or is difficult in some way. I’ve noticed what I do. I do honest reward and punishment. Example:

Reward: increased attachment and doing more for her.
Punishment: Think of her more casually.  At the extreme end look for other women.

Example: She takes a long time to get back to you, she is often late, she goes out and gets drunk with her friend, she is inconsiderate, you do things for her and she doesn’t reciprocate when she has the chance.

Each of these thigns should result in a punishment which means you think less of her and treat the relationship more casually, even to the point where you date other girls.

When she behaves perfectly you don’t need to punish her and can reward her with increased attachment.

The actions above would get on my nerves in a girl so why should I reward them with increased attachment?  This seems obvious but most guys will chase more when a girl plays games or takes away her emotion a little bit.  You also don’t need to go too far the other way in being a bastard all the time.

The sincere reward is just as important.  It allows to have a happy relationship.  The sincere punishment just shows her that she can’t start taking the piss.  It’s natural that women start to get bored if you are too nice, but they get bored and misbehave, and then you punish this and then they come back.  When you are in a relationship you have more “wiggle room” or margin for error so can get away with mistakes for short time before the relationship goes wrong.

Would love to know if this strikes a chord with any guys who have had relationships go wrong!