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There’s a term out there that applies to newbies. It’s called “Paralysis of Analysis”. When I first started I definitely fell into this trap. I’d read everything there is to read, and post every place I could find, but rarely go out and do any field work. Now I find it irritating to force myself to sit at my computer and post anywhere, since it takes time away from the time that could be spent in the field, developing social circles, or school and other life building goals.

Many new guys fall into this trap yet many find there way out again and begin going out in the field as I did. There seems to actually be a natural correlation. Those who stay in the community for 3 months will keep it going and those who stay for 5 months usually have begun really learning from the field. This post isn’t for the new guys though. This is for the guy’s who have taken the game seriously and have gone out again and again into the field and still have yet to begin seeing the results that they’ve been waiting for. This post is for every guy who has asked the following question…

“What do I need to do to make that change and get myself to the next level?”

The answer? Become Your Own Guru
Have you been in this game for over a year and a half and still not getting the results? Be your own guru.

Do you go out practically every night yet still see only mediocre improvement, if any, when looking back over the months or years? Be your own guru.

Are all your PUA friends progressing while you feel perpetually stuck on a plateau? That’s right, be your own guru.

See I began noticing when I first got into this that every time I went out with my community wings that a familiar pattern began to happen. Before every pick up we’d discuss what Guru X thinks and why some particular way is better because Guru Y said so. Then during the night out I’d notice that every community guy had a tendency to talk about game instead of actually doing it. I did this myself for a while but finally broke out of that mindset, even so many wings would try and talk about it regardless. Finally at the end of the night we’d have a debrief where I’d be told how something I did was wrong because of something Guru Z said and then we’d debate who made the most sense out of Guru’s A, B, and C.

Everything I did in field was the result of something some OTHER GUY thought was right and taught it to be done. It was maddening to see all the different styles and methods out there, and try and figure out which guy I should listen to. Hoping that the next product from Guru X would finally be the missing piece I’ve always needed. It got to the point where I felt almost everything I learned about pick up could be debated because of the different beliefs and ideas of Gurus. Now that I look back it was a new form of “Paralysis of Analysis” all over again but not quite, it wasn’t exactly guru worship either. It was something I’ll call “Guru Overload”.

PUA’s with Guru Overload can be going into the field nonstop, the problem however is that they keep trying to juggle all these different ideas out there and use stuff from other people without ever trying to figure things out for themselves. Instead of using the community as a reference point to make sense of their own findings they never try and make any of their own findings at all and just keep practicing the next shiny idea in the community. Should we be trying to DHV or is the answer simply to tease more?!

I finally had my click one day and decided that from now on I would determine what’s best in field, not any other guru, unless it made sense for what I personally have been finding. When I did this my game improved dramatically. My wings would say “Why are you doing that? Guru X says you should do this instead.” My reply to this every time was “Ah, but I say I should be doing that.” The thing is most of you already know the answers, or can work it out yourselves, but there’s the fear of “I’m not good enough and need to keep seeing what others think I should do.”

For those intermediate and advanced guys. You know the theory, you understand how this works, and anything you don’t know you understand how to figure it out and learn from yourself. Here it is finally plain as day, do exactly that. Be your own guru already. Socially experiment and stop doing what you think you SHOULD do or is NEEDED and instead begin doing what YOU feel is right and make your own assumptions on things. This doesn’t mean forget about ideas and material out there that can help though, instead learn to appreciate it on a much more meaningful level. Instead of it being something for you to shape yourself to, it can now become something that you may or may not incorporate into your own individual style.

I’m not going to tell you what needs to be done, or the next best thing for your game, or even a new method that you have to learn…how about you tell me instead?

Hope this helps guys,

-Psych

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(To read more about me visit my web page at www.puatraining.com/psych and to contact me for any one on one work or bootcamps email me at psych@puatraining.com)

I have a very good friend named Elev8 who, quite frankly, gets more vagina then a toilet seat.  We frequently talk on the phone for great lengths of time and often the topic will come to women and game, in this last conversation we were able to break down something very interesting that he does.  Now sometimes we have our differences in game but this fits perfectly with my own style so I’d like to share it all with you.

The question’s that came up was how do you know the right way to go in?  Should it be direct or indirect? How do you calibrate? ect ect  The answer that we came up with turned into a systematic approach on how to always open the best way possible based on calibrating to the girl.

First let’s take a look at day game.  You see the girl there and want to go in but what’s the best way to go about it.  The most normal and calibrated way would be by using a functional opener.  A functional opener is anything that is very low commitment and perfectly acceptable to ask such as “Do you know where there’s a restaurant?” or “My phone isn’t working, would you happen to know the time?”

What this does is it allows you to simply begin a conversation without any risk and to feel the girl out.  While we’re talking to her and while she’s answering we then gauge the girl and calibrate.  If she’s very receptive with a big smile, turning fully towards you, blushing slightly, or seems to be somewhat attracted from the beginning then the next thing you do can be completely direct.  “Thanks so much, I have to be honest though the real reason I came over here was because I liked your look and wanted to introduce myself.  I’m Psych and you are?”  HOW to go direct the right way is based upon calibrating correctly to the type of girl and figuring what type of direct line would work best for that type.  If you feel you don’t have immediate interest though then you should go indirect.  Again there’s many types of ways to go indirect and it always depends on calibrating to the type of girl again.

Now lets take a look at night game…

For night game it’s pretty much the same thing however we have to take into account the group and energy levels.  In order to not make this to complex though lets stick to the same format.  We go in with a functional opener then assess the situation and calibrate.  If we feel that direct may work and she’s instantly interested then we simply go direct again and run normal game from there.  Also understand that going in direct does NOT mean using direct game!  I can go direct then play the EXACT same type of game I would do with indirect.  The only difference is my intentions are clear which can simultaneously work for and against you in many ways (might describe those in a future post).  However lets say we feel direct wont work for night game, which IMO is usually the case, then we have to go indirect after our functional opener.  The only difference here though is I have the luxury of leaving and re-opening the set which I usually don’t have for day game.  This idea of opening, leaving, and re-opening has been called many things from short setting, working the room, pre-opening, Multiple Interaction Attraction, or the psychology term called the mere exposure effect.  However there’s a correct way to do this and a wrong way to do this, just as there are the right kind of indirect openers and wrong kinds which is what I break down in detail during every bootcamp I do.

As with everything in pick up I strongly believe in the power of simplicity.  So since you now understand the mechanics of this lets make a simple guide to follow to ensure the best success possible.  The guide is go in functional, assess the situation and calibrate, then decide whether it’s best to now go direct or stay indirect.  Now do I use this exact guide every time?  No, but that’s because I have enough experience to know when to change things.  Remember this is a GUIDE not a RULE, so always do your own social experiments and try new things.  However in most situations this is probably the best way to go about it that I’ve seen.

Hope this helps,

Psych

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Hey guys sorry I haven’t been active lately but I have a ton of new stuff to share with you that will be coming out soon. Recently though while doing a bootcamp in DC I had a dinner break and headed over to a normal restaurant along with another coach and best friend Lukalicious. Before we order though I spot a huge group of girls and decide to go in with my stripper opener for fun. Next thing I know Lukalicious has the camera out and we begin to mess around, here’s what happened…

Stripper Opener

After this the women began trying to get myself and Lukalicious to come with them to some club with a mechanical bull but sadly we had our own bootcamp to run. The point though is that you can literally game anywhere and should always be open to the opportunity.

Hope this helps,
Psych

(To read more about me visit my web page at www.puatraining.com/psych and to contact me for any personal coaching or bootcamps email me at psych@puatraining.com)

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Recently I had a bootcamp up in Atlanta and was able to meet up with my ex girlfriend.  This is the same ex who used to go out with me to pick up women and I gave her the name Cyren.  Even though we’ve broken up there are still, and always will be, strong feelings between us as well as massive attraction.  What followed was inevitable…

Cyren picks me up from the airport and immediately the flirting begins even though she trys to act distant and puts a stop to any of my sexual advances…it was pretty much always a love/hate relationship so this was nothing new.  Over the course of the day though we naturally began building comfort again, since it’s been months since I saw her last, and gradually the sexual tension began to rise.  After I introduced her to the other instructors I brought her back to my room and finally kissed her again.  After the first night of the bootcamp I had her come by my place and then I sealed the deal and we were back to normal again.

Now the second night I invited her to come out to the club where the bootcamp was being held after it ended.  I obviously didn’t want her there during because my attention had to be totally focused on my students and not on her.  When she arrived she had brought her friend who I’ve seen around before, and tried gaming in the past, but nothing ever came of it.  That entire night I constantly lead the two around the club building compliance not so much from Cyren but from her friend.  The three of us danced building up some sexual tension and finally I felt it was time for the bounce.  We head over to another club where Cyren’s friend used to work at and immediately guys begin hitting on Cyren and her friend.  I dragged Cyren away to be with me but left her friend there for a very specific purpose, the more her buying temperature got spiked by other guys the more recpetive she’d be to me later that night.  I already knew I was her ride so no matter what happened I’d be with her in the end.

While Cyren’s friend flirted I did some other half hearted pick up attempts with Cyren but it was more for fun then anything.  We all begin having some drinks and finally the club closes down.  Now it’s time for end game and handling logistics.  The girls want to go swimming so I figure there’s a pool in my hotel.  When I get there though there’s no such luck, with some quick improvising I decide we can just go to my room…I told the girls I had a jacuzzi in there which was bullshit but whatever.  Once we get there though I find two of the other instructors in bed and realize this wont work.  Made for a funny scene though stumbling into the room laughing and waking them up but now I had to handle logistics fast.  I find out that Cyren’s friend has a pool so we head over to her place.

Once there the girls begin changing and I make sure to sit in front of them while they do.  Cyren’s friend removes her panties in front of me giving me an eyeful of vag%^a which was a very good sign.  However the pool turned out to be closed!  Cyren’s friend gets all mad and storms into the living room and Cyren pulls me into the bedroom…guess no threesome was gonna happen.  After my round with Cyren though we join her friend and she comments how she heard us going at it.  I bring up squ$%^ting and Cyren begins to tell her friend how she should try.  I get some objections at first but immediately reframe it saying how it’s not like we’re gonna have s&x or anything I’m just gonna teach you, plus Cyren can help out.  With some help from Cyren I get her to agree but before we start I tell her she needs to get turned on so I let Cyren and her play around, after watching a bit I join in “to help”.  Then the fingering starts and truth be told she was the first girl I couldn’t make sq%^&t!  However after she was that aroused the three of us just began to fool around and I began banging Cyren.  Quickly I switched though and started with her friend which was a surprise to both but after a bit I could tell Cyren was getting jealous so had to end that.  Finshed up with Cyren then called it a night and had her drive me back to my room.

Here’s a pic of us outside my hotel room before going in…

http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c109/jlsstud13/LAandother032.jpg

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For those that don’t know the 4th of July is when us yanks celebrate our independance day from ::cough:: England ::cough:: by blowing up a small portion of our country with fireworks.  Since it’s a national holiday I knew it’d be a fun night…

This really starts however on July 3.  I’m out doing an Anxiety Removal Course and one of my friends “The 305″ introduces me to these two girls he met outside the club.  We bring them into our group and just party and work the rest of the night.  After the Anxiety Removal Course I figure it’s time to run my own game and I open my target for real now.

Since we’ve already been introduced (the best opener by far) it’s fairly easy to start off with.  I simply sit down and join them then begin joking around a bit.  I basically just find any ways to add value and continually leave and re-enter the set to build comfort and familiarity (a tactic taught to me by AFC Adam).  Once this is done I begin finding out the logistics and realize they’re here visiting from texas and will be in my hometown of Ft Lauderdale tomorrow.  However I want to really justify the number close to make it solid and also want to make sure I’m not just a ”club guy” and bounce them out of the club that night.  Here’s how it went down…

Psych: You do realize that once you come to south beach you never leave right?  There’s to many great things here!

HB: Hahaha I know!! We don’t want to go but we have to leave monday! (makes a sad face)

Psych:   So much you haven’t seen though!  I bet you guys haven’t even checked out our famous Jerry’s diner…

HB: What’s that?

Psych:  OMG see this is what I mean…I’m going to have to be your south beach guide now there’s no way around it.  Jerry’s diner is one of south beach’s most famous places.  It has incredible food and is open all night…also there’s a surprise there that makes it famous.

HB: What’s the surprise?!?!

Psych: You’ll have to wait and find out…I’m gonna head over there with some friends soon, come and join us.

HB: Yea we’re down!

Psych: Cool I have to say hi to some more people here but in case we get seperated what’s the best way to contact you?

HB: (gives me her number)

Later on we bounce to Jerry’s diner along with 3 of my wings.  The whole time we all just joke around constantly, keep things fun, and make tons of inside jokes.  There was nothing “gamey” about anything we did there.  It literally just showed the girls that my friends and I are cool, fun, and most important…normal.

The next day I give my girl a text…

Psych: Hey cutie great meeting you! You always so friendly to strangers? (credit AFC Adam)

HB: Hey! It was great meeting you as well! I am friendly to people who are friendly back :) give us a call if you are out in fort lauderdale!!

Psych: Good answer! Gonna be out tonight so we’ll meet up for sure

HB: You better! Haha

Psych: Lets pregame first though, I’ll pick you guys up.

HB: What time?

From here I just handled the logistics.  Thing is though another girl I’ve been debating to hook up with also invited me out for the fourth.  Apparantly she had a hook up to a good club, we’ll call her HB2.  I decided to change the pregame plans into after party plans (helps logistics even more lol) since we had to get to the club early.  I pick up HB along with her two friends and then meet up with HB2 and her friend.

While waiting for HB2 and her friend though I spot two model looking guys.  One is off talking to another girl and one is left alone.  HB’s friend goes up to talk to him “because he’s lonely” and my spidey sense begins tingling sensing danger.  I leave it alone for now though but then the other friend leaves his girl and comes over to join us.  They introduce themselves to the girls and totally ignore me…big no no.  Time to destroy some more naturals :).  This was fairly easy enough I just whispered to my target “looks like he struck out with his girl and is ready for round 2, try and be nice though.”  She giggled and when HB2 came around I told HB’s friend (the one with the bf) that we had to go to get in…which consists leaving the guys.  I knew she’d be the most down to leave the guys since she has a bf and like a champ c%^k blocked her friends.  Sometimes the mother hens turn into your best friend!!!  The guys tried to argue but just ended up looking needy and we ditched them at the door.

Once inside we begin taking advantage of the open bar.  HB keeps feeding me drinks (IOI) and I bounce back and forth between HB’s group and HB2’s.  This starts to subtly create competition between the two girls which was amazing, no longer did I have to adopt a “be the prize mindset” I literally was the prize now.  Using women’s catty and competitive nature is an extremely powerful tool.  I began taking silly pictures with HB and also got her kissing my cheek to introduce a sexual frame.

Eventually though the music begins playing and HB2 begins grinding on me to steal me away.  Game on ladies!!! The next 20 minutes consisted of dividing my attention between the two and seeing what clever ways they’d try and get it back.  Usually it consisted of grinding on me when the other looked away, taking me to the bar for drinks, taking pictures with them, or random little games they came up with.  I truly feel the highest level of game is where you make it to be that the women game you.  However HB2 lives here and HB only has one more night…I choose HB!  I finally give her my full attention and we begin going to town on the dance floor (my dance floor game has become SICK now and I didn’t pull any punches).  Eventually enough sexual tension is built for the kiss and I go in.  Later I learn this was the moment she knew she’d be sleeping with me!

After this her friend with the BF began getting p^ssy but I quickly disarmed her and got it to where she’d leave and go back to her bf while I stay with the girls.  Don’t know how to break that part of game down just yet but I suppose it’s “Quick Logistical Management Game?” lol.  Then I bounced the two remaining girls to another room (at this point I ditched HB2 and her friend).  However a serious problem occured…I needed a wing!  Luckily one of the skilled guys from the miami lair was in the place “Hwood” so I texted him and he came through.  After bringing him into the set we literally went to town on both our girls.  When it comes to bouncing a girl from the club to my place for s&x I don’t like there to be any confusion at all.  At one point I had my girls leg wrapped around me while grabbing her ass and Hwood was feeling over his girls skirt.

Finally I just say “lets head out to that after party” and we all begin going to our cars.  Hwood takes his girl and I take mine.  However there’s some MORE logistical problems with my girl not wanting to go to her place because of the friend with the bf so I just say we’ll go to mine.  I call Hwood to let him know then head to my place.  Once there I literally throw the girl on my bed and begin escalating however I begin getting some weird form of LMR!!!

Now I’ve NEVER had LMR once it was this on so I was really shocked.  She even said something like “it’s not gonna be that easy…”  I’m almost lost for words here but I continue to escalate and keep getting the LMR.  Then I get “you have to earn it…”  Now most community guys here would royally mess up, hell a year ago I probably would have as well.  Now I know better though then to enter a dumb frame battle especially this late in the game so I just say “and how do I do that?”  She giggles and admits she doesn’t know.  This is when I figure out that it’s not so much LMR but that she wants it done a CERTAIN WAY.  Basically not just rushing into it but doing more foreplay.  So we begin to just fool around a bit and then she gets a phone call.  While on the phone I begin fingering her and making her squirm while not letting up.  Finally she tells her friend “I have to go!” and then I close the deal.

The next day we have the following text convo:

HB: Hey thanks for the ride home.  Sucks we had to say goodbye :(

Psych: No prob hun, just make sure we get to say hello again ;)

HB: Of course! I had a great time with you :) come to Austin soon

Psych: Will do!

HB: Can you do me a huge favor and I’ll make it up to you? Find me a number to a cab :)

Psych: lol and how will you make it up to me?…

HB: I will do whatever you want haha (within reason) :)

Psych: hmmm naughty teacher outfit?

HB: Done! Let me know when you head to Texas and I’ll have it ready!

Psych: Deal (give her number)

HB: Thanks so much babe! What kind of teacher outfit would you like?

Psych: hmmm hair in bun, button down shirt with push up bra, glasses, and skirt…

HB: Ok done.  It will be waiting on you!

Hope this helps,

Psych

(To read more about me visit my web page at www.puatraining.com/psych and to contact me for any one on one work or bootcamps email me at psych@puatraining.com)

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In my last LR I talked about the benefits of social circle game which I truly feel is the best way to go about things.  However I wanted to cover the other end of the spectrum namely being SNL (same night lays).  While there’s nothing wrong with it I’ve never been a huge fan for a few reasons.  The quality of girls you get are usually not as good, there’s no real connection which makes the s*x kind of meaningless (at least to me), and if this is what the majority of your game consists of you’ll need to go out hunting every night and busting your ass to make it happen no matter how good you get.

This night started with me doing a one on one with my student.  While doing a bootcamp I always demo of course but never long enough or seriously enough to get a girl all the way into bed because it’d take too much time away from helping my student’s game.  However once the bootcamp work is officially done it becomes another matter and then Psych can go to town.  I decided to stay out with my student this night and just wing him to see what would happen.  We go out to a popular lounge in the area where I meet up with a good friend of mine who’s actually an instructor for another company and specializes in SNL game.  I figure “when in rome” and the hunt begins for which girl I’ll be taking home with me tonight.

Now the first thing to realize when it comes to SNL game is that it kind of takes a “PUA radar”.  The thing is that not every girl, regardless of how good your game is, will be the kind to sleep with you that night.  Even if she is often times logistics wont allow it.  What this means is that you need a radar to quickly determine which girl seems like a SNL girl and then quickly figuring out logistics to see if they can be handled in set otherwise you waste your time.  At first it didn’t seem like there were any real possibilities, it was a small bar lounge with only about 50 people and only half being women.  However when the other guys began giving up it only motivated me more to make something happen.  As I’m making my rounds I’m keeping an eye out for two things, somewhat buzzed and sexual.  I see a large set with giggling girls who are slightly high energy, probably buzzed so one out of two is there.  I go open the set and immediately one of the girls touches my chest and gets close to my face when talking to me…bingo on the sexuality.

Once you spot your SNL girl there’s a few things that always need to happen.  The sexual tension must be built really high, strong frame control needs to take place, you MUST know exactly how to lead the set and handle all obstacles and logistics to get her to your place, and also have the ability to handle any shit/congruence tests she throws at you.

As soon as she touches my chest and gets close my hands go around her waist and I bring her in close to show dominance.  I begin using AFC Adam’s formula of comfort and breaking rapport while keeping my nonverbals (such as eye contact) extremely sexual.  What resulted was fluff talk with slight sexual innuendos to break rapport and physical take aways and turns.  However my hands never left her side.  I then began leading the pick up by isolating her to get a drink of water with me.  This is what I call a visual isolation since the group can still see where you both are, from here I told her we should sit somewhere to drink since my feet hurt and brought her into full isolation away from the friends.

Once seated the qualification and sexual escalation begins.  The kino is massively turned up with my arm wrapped around her while I stroke her leg and thigh qualifying her on topics that are either sexual in nature or lead to sexual frames (for example being fun and wild).  From here I go for the kiss and get it and from experience I’m pretty sure that I can close as long as logistics can be handled.  However it’s always around this point that the shit tests begin to come.  With this particular set I handled the logistics by being completely unnreactive and extremely ballsy/confident with my sexuality.  For example at one point the girl said “I think I’m going to have to go back with my friends tonight” which implies she IS thinking of a SNL so I respond “And I think that you’re going to have to come home with me so I can ravage that body of yours”.  The shit tests comes again with “Hahahaha no I don’t think so…”  which I reply “We’ll see…before this night is done I’m going to be f@%king the s%&t out of you.”  Her face was priceless here and she was literally speechless but eventually just settled for a disbelieving smile.

As the night progressed I’d amp up sexuality in more ways by grabbing her breasts, kissing her neck, and anything else that went with the moment.  It became to much for her though and she went to the bathroom.  While doing that I opened her group of friends and began winning them over so that when she came back she saw me in set with them.  Not knowing what to do she eventually grabbed one of her girlfriends and went over to the bar.  Eventually her other friends joined her and I was left chilling with my student.  What then took place was a huge test…who would break first me or her?  Often a massive hidden test that needs to be placed is the girl seeing that you have the ability to walk away and when this test is given it’s usually the last one.  I remained with my student until finally the girls friend came over to tell me my girl wanted me to come over there.  Many community guys I know would mess up here as well and refuse in order to stay “alpha” but the act of her sending her friend over already means I won…I just need to accept her invitation.

I go over and join her and flirt some more.  She brings up the fact that she has to leave with her friends so I tell her that she’s an adult and can do whatever she’d like.  I flat out refused to be needy or try and manipulate her into coming with me.  I knew she wanted me and all I had to do was make sure I didn’t chase in the slightest, just keep her being aroused and let it be her choice what she wants to do.  I saw the raging battle inside her head and figured she might need SOME plausible deniability to not feel like a slut.  Because of this I suggested we instead just go get something to eat and her friends could even come to (if they don’t perfect and if they do I can always bounce her to my place after).  Her friends weren’t hungry so this was a no go.  Sometimes things don’t work out though and that’s when you need a plan B.  I tell her that my friend’s place (the student’s) has an amazing view and she should come see which she agrees to along with her cousin.  I pull up my car and take her, her cousin, and my student to the student’s apartment.  Once we get in there sex is just implied.  Everyone gets some water, I tell the girl “hey come check out my room”, and then throw her on the bed.  I always tell people this but just like some PUAs assume attraction I assume sex.  The clothes come off easily and she begins giving me head.  From there I put on a condom and get on top of her to close the deal.  I was told later that my student was talking to the cousin and heard the banging of the bed against the wall.  When the cousin asked what it was he replied…must be construction work.

Hope this helps,

Psych

(To read more about me visit my web page at www.puatraining.com/psych and to contact me for any one on one work or bootcamps email me at psych@puatraining.com)

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One of the greatest realizations I’ve ever had in game was realizing that 90% of my game was to try and impress the girl.  Whether it was being interesting, trying to find ways to DHV, act alpha, be funny, cold read and role play, or a myriad of other things…it all was to impress.  Logically this makes sense though.  We want the girl to like us, so by impressing her and showing her how high value we are then voila, she likes us!  Unfortunately while this makes sense on paper it rarely makes sense in the field.  Lets look at some of the reasons why…

*When we try and impress it means we want validation and approval from the other person implying they’re of a higher status then us

*Trying to impress leads to chasing and needy behaviors

*When we try and impress we have to “sell” an idea (in this case attraction) which puts us in a dancing monkey or entertainer role

*Wanting to impress leads to the possibility of failure which in turn leads to unattractive qualities such as nervousness, frusteration, resentment, insecurity, and of course anxiety

*It immediately puts the girl as the prize

The list goes on….

Instead though what if we gamed in a way that focused on making opportunities for the girl to impress us instead?  Then everything I just mentioned earlier is now flipped.  When the girl begins attempting to impress us she begins chasing us which then causes her to become deeply attracted.  We all value that which we work for and which is hard to get.  The problems most guys have is that they want soooooooo bad to convince the girl that they’re high value they do the exact opposite.  High value guys don’t brag or try and impress, they simply assume everyone knows they are high value.  Instead of trying to DHV truly high value guys will instead offer tests and get to know someone to see if THEY match up to HIM.  The act of seeing if a girl is worthy of you without trying to impress her creates tremendous attraction. 

With this new mindset in place my game has drastically changed.  At this point it rarely looks like I’m really gaming or doing much of anything anymore.  The vast majority of my game is really finding ways for the girl to game me.  I want HER DHV stories, I want HER busting out routines to keep me interested, I want to be entertained by HER, and I can take it as far as finding ways for the girl to even sexually escalate on me. 

By showing and adding value (as opposed to trying to DHV or brag),  by interacting with the girl in a way where you truly are not trying to impress her, by leading the interaction and helping her find ways to game you, as well as showing a strong comfortability and confidence (especially when it comes to sexuality)…I promise you’ll have the girl finding all sorts of ways to impress you.

Hope this helps,

Psych

(To read more about me visit my web page at www.puatraining.com/psych and to contact me for any one on one work or bootcamps email me at psych@puatraining.com)

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Many guys in this community have limited themselves to cold approach, which in all honesty is a great skill to have but should not be the end all be all.  Most naturals get many women and of higher quality by playing social circle game and this is something I hope for everyone to achieve.  Alright on to the LR….

I met this girl a while back at a christmas party.  For the christmas party I wanted to add value to everyone’s night while at the same time staying in the spotlight and generating social proof, what was the answer?…a santa suit.

http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c109/jlsstud13/n599291058_1575031_2324.jpg

The whole night I remained the life of the party bouncing from one girl to the next.  Whether it was taking pictures, getting the girls to come outside with me singing christmas carols, playing with the whip, or a billion roleplays of me as santa and them as naughty elves I kept the fun level up the entire time.  The best thing was that most of the guys there did the typical “act cool” approach which blew them out of the water.

Now when I looked around I spotted my target and she was easily the hottest girl there.  Lets call her HBSC (SC for social circle). I knew that the best way to play this would be to encorprate her into my social circle (and since we’re at a party together we have common friends by proxy).  So the entire night I would focus the majority of my time on the girls I already knew and then encorprate her as an after thought.  I made sure to get her number on a high note and ended it there.

Over the next few months I would basically hang out with her in a big group setting and then with every outing dwindle the numbers down until it was natural for just me and her to hang out.  When it comes to social circle game a big thing to be aware of also is the sexual tension.  To much sexual tension and you become the creepy guy in the circle who’s always trying to get with the HB.  To little and you become just another good friend.  The trick is to break rapport slightly while hanging out but in sexual ways.  For example when HBSC was taking forever walking up the stairs at one point I remember telling her to hurry up while laughing and giving her a playful tap on the butt.  Also when playing flip cup I’d come up behind her to see how she was doing and squeeze her sides.  Finally we made a bet on something and I made sure the bet was that the winner gets a lap dance from the other person.  Funny enough I lost the bet but that’s irrelevant, the sexual frame is now already there.

One day I get a text from her saying that she’s bored late at night, this immediately translates to me as a booty call and all I need to do now is close the deal without messing things up.  Logistics are set since we both live at the college campus all I have to do is provide a reason to be in one of our rooms and some plausible deniability for the hook up.  The solution is probably the best end game routine for anyone who goes to college…power hour  :D.

Power hour for those who don’t know is when each person takes a shot of beer every minute for an hour.  Doesn’t sound like a big deal but it definately does the trick.  She agrees to this so I end up going to her place with the beers.  We begin the game and just vibe at first to generate some comfort.  I look at pictures of her and her family, have her play some music for me…ect ect.  Then bit by bit I begin to set the mood.  I say it’s really bright in here and put on her lamp and turn off the main lights, then I get some fast paced songs going and begin dancing with her in her room.  She reminds me that I owe her a lap dance so I oblige and give a funny one.  Then I tell her that she needs to show me how to do it right.  She begins giving me a lap dance and I immediately begin getting very sexual with her.  Biting her neck, rubbing over her pants, running my hands up and down her body ect.  I then tell her that it’s good but to do it right she’d need to lose the pants and immediately begin undoing them for her and pull them off.  Right there is something key for end game…I assume s*x.  I don’t ask her to take it off, I take it off for her and lead the whole time.  Also there’s never any awkward hesitation, you have to be dominant about it.  From there I get her shirt off by saying “if you want to be a PRO…” lol.  After that it was pretty much over.  I just caveman and throw her on the bed and then begin fingering her from behind.  She turns over and pulls me on top and then I simply get out my condom and close.

Here’s a picture of the girl.

http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c109/jlsstud13/n1100430159_30029884_9634.jpg

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My last two posts here emphasized just how important it is to be deprogrammed.  It’s time to now abandon scientific or structured game as well as “natural” game that really isn’t natural as much as just chaotic with no real instruction.  In it’s place I’d like everyone to learn social game.  Social game is based on the idea of being normal, stresses the importance of calibration, always includes a larger perspective of game (involving meta game, social circle game, and lifestyle), and stresses an important mindshift from being a pick up artist to simply a social artist.  I’d honestly have rather been ranked as “The Best New Social Artist” then “The Best New PUA” if given the choice…but oh well.

The very first step to my deprograming project is to first define what game actually is.  What I mean is what is the goal of game?  What are we trying to learn and accomplish? Many guys are confused on this and look to old school community teachings that mess them up.  They may look at game as manipulation, trying to prove your a high value guy, trying to lower a girls value or self esteem, being a bad boy, trying to impress the girl…the list goes on.  All of these are really bad mindsets to have and with them you’re bound to fail because you’re developing your game in the wrong way.  IMHO game is only three things and I’ll list them in the order of importance.

1. Likeability

To get the girl the most important thing by far and the first thing that needs to be accomplished is to be liked.  Whether it’s s*x or just having a conversation if the girl doesn’t like you why would she do anything with you?  Likeability comes from many things.  Connecting on mutual interests, adding value to the girl in some way (as opposed to demonstrating value which I’ll cover in a future post), being normal and well calibrated, building comfort with her in the form of trust and rapport, as well as the ability to be social (for example getting along with her friends or introducing her to people).  Being a likeable person in general is the single most important trait that you can improve on.

Now lets take a look at an old school community teaching that falls into this category and the exact problem it causes.  Being a high value guy would make us likeable.  There’s no doubt about this.  Then the question becomes how do we act high value?  Well having really interesting DHV stories for one, knowing cool magic tricks and routines would get people liking us, and of course doing things like cold reading and roleplaying are great.  However the community made a huge error here.  Instead of trying to be likeable they narrowed it to trying to be high value.  When you change the ultimate goal of anything it makes a HUGE difference.  Here are the main differences that this change has caused.

By focusing on being high value and demonstrating those traits they throw away other likeable traits because they don’t fit into the high value frame.  In addition since their ultimate goal is being high value and not likeable they used flawed logic to show why some likeable traits are bad for game when it’s actually the opposite.  The most obvious example of this would be basic manners and politeness.  Many community guys cringe when I say phrases like “excuse me”, “dont mean to bother you”, or “I don’t mean to be rude”.  However this is often simply good manners that make us more likeable.  This same high value logic will sometimes also make guys act weird (such as peacocking) or serious.  To be likeable it’s best to be normal and fun/playful.  Now it’s important not to think of being high value as bad.  If done right it DOES make us likeable.  Also things like roleplaying and games you can play in set can be great if done the right way.  The trick is to always keep in mind that being high value is just a way to be likeable not the goal itself.  If you’re ever doing something that raises your value but makes you less likeable then you’re doing something wrong.  Also keep in mind that the opposite of being likeable isn’t being hated, it’s indifference.  Sometimes it’s fun and useful to have challenging frames where the girl acts like she hates us or there’s teasing involved.  When this is done though it should always be obvious that the girl does actually like you though.

2. Persuasiveness

Once we are likeable the next step is to make sure we can be persuasive.  In every pick up we need to get compliance, need to lead the interaction, and need to generate attraction.  However persuasion is NOT manipulation.  Manipulation is trying to trick someone into doing something they don’t want to do or wouldn’t have liked.  Persuasion is getting someone to see things from your perspective and being convincing enough to have them make the choice themselves that falls in your favor.  The best book out there for this is Robert Cialdini’s book called “Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion.”  Here he lists 6 persuasion tactics being likeability (no shocker here), commitment, social proof, authority, reciprocation, and scarcity.  Also generating attraction falls under persuasion because we are persuading the girl to become attracted to us.  However many people go about this the wrong way, with the most common mistake being trying to impress.  This topic however warrants it’s own seperate post though.  Finally when it comes to attraction the goal that makes the most sense IMO comes from AFC Adam and that is to get investment from the girl.

3. Sexuality

You might wonder why I put this last since it seems like such an important topic.  There’s only one reason really.  Up until now you can game anyone and I mean just that…anyone.  From ugly girls and guys to children and old men, you’ll also always increase your skills by doing so.  The difference is game up till now only consists of likeability and persuasion, the only time we use sexuality is with a girl that we want.  The importance of sexuality is obvious, without it the interaction can never lead to s^x.  We have to show that we’ll be more then a friend, create arousal from the girl, and be comfortable being sexual and know how to properly sexually escalate. Often though the community either heavily shys away from this in order “to preserve value and not show interest” or else over compensates by stressing how important “sexual intent” is and making guys sleezy.  Simply just be comfortable being sexual and use calibration to know when are good times to show it.

For now try and see if you can format your normal game under these principles and under this order of importance.  This is the first step to being deprogrammed and everything I teach will either make you more likeable, persuasive, or sexual.  In future posts I’ll also be going over the difference between Value game and Investment game, The “trying to impress” mindset, the 3 levels of social skills and why most community guys don’t get results including how to immediately fix this, as well as much more including endless step by step comparisons of old style game to how I see it now.  As always I welcome all questions and comments.

Hope this helps,

Psych

(To read more about me visit my web page at www.puatraining.com/psych and to contact me for any one on one work or bootcamps email me at psych@puatraining.com)

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I know I promised a post on what game is all about, but I just had an incredible conversation with a girl I picked up that helps to truly show why it’s so important community guys become deprogrammed.  I want you all to first really understand why this is important.  However don’t take my word for it…take Michelle’s.  I met Michelle through a friend of mine, she’s his sister, along with another PUA who actually is an instructor for another company.  However I wont be using his name.  At the end of the night I hooked up with Michelle and then it dawned on me now to ask her why.  Here’s the convo we had over facebook…

Jarett

so when did you first realize you were attracted to me?

and why me and not the other PUA?

6:18pm Michelle

haha

O man

this is fun…

6:18pmJarett

;)

6:18pm Michelle

That PUA…

Was trying way too hard

He said stupid stuff

6:18pmJarett

lol

6:18pm Michelle

turned me off

Way too straight forward

without any actual backing to his words

6:18pmJarett

haha glad neither of us have been straight forward!

6:19pm Michelle

wasn’t feeling it….especially with that whole “hey kiddo” shit act. Lol

6:19pmJarett

haha

6:19pm Michelle

Yeah lets be brother and sister! Yay!

Lol

Nah he’s cool man…but i wasn’t feeling anything going on there

from the get go

6:19pmJarett

ok

and me?

6:19pm Michelle

Then you walked in

lol

The end

haha jk

6:20pmJarett

oh shut up! lol

6:21pm Michelle

Nah I knew right away you were better at this game. The other PUA immediately changes his posture and you were the “alfa male” in the room

Lol

Or so it seemed

6:21pmJarett

so i basically stayed comfortable with my body language while he tried to “act” alpha with his

?

6:22pm Michelle

Nah but yeah…you just played it cool…you didn’t interact with me and I didnt try either cause it was intimidating

And I felt no need

Cause i knew I’d get something by the end of the night

Lol

6:22pmJarett

lol ok

6:23pm Michelle

Haha nah I wasn’t sure how to read you but over all i thought you were playing a mind game by not talking to me…kinda making me feel like i have to come to you to prove my social worth (if that makes sense?) and i knew i would eventually open up after i got to the club

6:24pmJarett

so basically I didn’t invest in you at all at first and got you to start investing in me first

?

6:24pm Michelle

No…

Haha

6:25pmJarett

lol

6:25pm Michelle

the first part is right…but

I wasn’t going to at all cause it wasn’t working but i wanted to have fun and then gave up and wanted to have fun. Lol

I was out! At a club. I want fun

6:25pmJarett

lol

6:25pm Michelle

and the other PUA wasn’t working

haha

6:26pmJarett

yea but I saw you getting hit on by other guys

6:26pm Michelle

Whatever…they were ugly

Lol

6:26pmJarett

lol

6:26pm Michelle

kinda lame

and I liked your hair

Hahaha

6:26pmJarett

ah the blue hair strikes again!

6:26pm Michelle

dude…it wasn’t even BLUE then!

Hahaha

Yes I like the hair

6:26pmJarett

oh well then just that good I guess lol

6:27pm Michelle

i had seen it blue in pictures before

lol

I saw your pics a week before i met you…cause ima stalker

6:28pmJarett

oh really?

glad you checked me out lol

6:28pm Michelle

Haha

6:28pmJarett

i remember just when you came up by me near the end and I saw an open window. Bought you a drink and then had you leaning on the bar in front of me

once you began rubbing your butt on me that was all the window I needed lol

6:28pm Michelle

yup that did it

hahaha

i was like oooo yeah…

but then i turned around and thought…UGH! I need another drink!

LOLLOL kidddddinggg

6:29pmJarett

hey!!!

lol

6:30pm Michelle

Haha nah i liked what I saw and felt and everything else.

So congrats

haha

6:30pmJarett

thanks

one last thing

6:30pm Michelle

yeah whatever

:-)

yeah?

6:31pmJarett

did you feel that the other PUA came across more gamey or less normal then me? I ask just because we have very different styles so would like an honest answer

6:31pm Michelle

Ummm

6:32pm Michelle

Idk…you both are so different I cant judge you on the same scale haha…but he came across trying too hard…and I think the only reason I judged your game when i first saw you was cause I already knew you were a pua

but if i didnt…you woulnd’t have seemed like you were even playing anything. Not in my opinion

6:33pmJarett

thanks

 

Hope this helps,

Psych

(To read more about me visit my web page at www.puatraining.com/psych and to contact me for any one on one work or bootcamps email me at psych@puatraining.com)

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