But proceed with caution young Daygamer, for there are many treacherous hidden traps that await you on your sexy quest.

Some girls are more steadfast 0n their mission to remain strictly ‘unopened’ and are, I’m not afraid to admit,  extremely difficult if not impossible to open.

Some others out there will do everything in their power to thwart your attempts at approaching the girl you want.

But by letting everyone know who these daygame villains are, hopefully it will help to give you guys a competitive edge. Once identified, maybe, just maybe, these daygame nightmares will be no match for your skill.

So who are they?

Let’s start with the easiest to overcome and make our way through to the vilest and scariest of them all.

1) The Stormtrooper

Ok, these girls are in a HURRY. Have you ever seen anyone power walking before? This is what The Stormtrooper does.

She is LATE.

For something.

I’m not sure what, but what whatever it is she needs to get there.

FAST.

Usually characterised by the panicked look on her face and the high velocity with which they travel, these characters are a very tricky breed indeed.

But all is not lost!

In my experience they are usually in a hurry for one of the following reasons:

1) they are late meeting a friend

2) they are late for work

3) they are running to catch a bus

4) they are trying to get to a job interview/casting

If you approach and you find out she’s doing one of these, there are two possibilities:

1) Tell her you’re going in the same direction and walk with her.

I think it is ideal if you can stop a moving girl and talk to her from a stationary position, but if there is no choice, as in this instance, then make sure you give a false time constraint as you start walking with her, for example, I’ve gotta go up this way but I’ve gotta head off to the right in a few minutes. The a false-time-constraint serves to intercept the thought that might pop into a girl’s mind when it is clear that you intent to stick around for a while – the thought that says “oh no, how long is this guy gonna be here for? What if he turns out to be a weirdo?”.

Of course, you’re not a weirdo, this thought just stems from a lack of information about you. She doesn’t KNOW that you’re not weird yet. So you throw in the false time constraint to navigate this social landmine, which will buy you some time to demonstrate your non-weirdness. Then when you feel the time is right you can tell you her really have to go, and go for the close. If the interaction has been short, it might be wise to go for a Facebook close rather than a number, as this is less likely to flake.

2) Go for a FAST close.

What you need to do is to voice concerns she may have, but as if they are your own concerns.

For example:

- you’re a complete stranger and she has no idea whether you’re a weirdo crazy person or not.

- this is a very unusual situation, people don’t normally do this.

- You might start texting me all the time and calling every day.

So I might say this to her:

“Look, you’re super cute – and you don’t SEEM like a crazy person ;) … I’d really like to talk properly but I’m in a MASSIVE rush, I’ve got a meeting to rush to. I’m not gonna lie to you, I’m REALLY busy at the mo, but if I get a spare sec at some point I’ll shoot you a text or something. Put you’re number in here. Quick I’ve gotta go!”

Make sense?

So you’re kind of addressing all the issues she might be thinking, but you’re telling her that’s what you’re thinking about HER.

Jolly good. If you follow this advice, you’d be surprised what you can get away with.

I once stopped and number closed a very cute girl as she was about to jump into a waiting taxi! :)

2) The Blank Foreigner

The arch nemesis of the BNP (British National Party – small right wing/fascist political party here in the UK). According to Mr Griffin (the leader of the party) they represent everything that is bad about the world!

Well, Mr Griffin clearly hasn’t been to Sweden.

Or Denmark.

Or Norway.

Because if he had, he probably wouldn’t have come back (not a bad thing…).

Let’s face it, when the big cheese upstairs was dishing out the good looks, english people were in bed, with a hangover, after downing 15 pints of stella the night before due to the football match on down the pub. By the time they turned up the big man didn’t have much left in his sexy sack.

I wasn’t there at the time, but from the results of his handy-work I’d guess that camping out at the front of the line weeks before the pearly gates even opened for business, were the Swedish, Danish, Norwegians, Russians, Lithuanians, Latvians, Brazilians and Argentinians.

So, as you can probably tell, I LOVE foreign girls.

I PREFER foreign girls.

But there is one type of foreigner that evades me still.

The Blank Foreigner.

There she is. Her blonde russian locks rippling in the autumn wind as you walk towards her.

She smiles at you. You smile back.

Time to do some daygame.

“Excuse me, were you smiling at me there? Or just thinking of puppies?”

Her smile fades.

The blank look.

“eerr….. um….. no.. english….”

Shit.

“Oh… erm…. er…. I…… I SAID, YOU….. smile at me?!   um….. ”

The blank look.

Crap.

What’s the best thing to do in this situation? Well, if you have a notepad and pen with you, you could definitely have a fun interaction with her by drawing things on the pad to describe what you’re saying. I’ve done this a few times and it’s been loads of fun. I once number closed a really cute Japanese girl who literally didn’t speak a word of English by doing this. But when I called her I realised how completely pointless that was! (think about it)

I usually like to gesture my opener to the girl if she doesn’t speak english.

“I” (point to me)

“saw you” (point to my eyes, then to her)

walking” (show my fingers walking)

And I thought you looked gorgeous (put my hands on my heart and pretend im dumbstruck)

Usually gets a cool reaction :)

Saving that the best thing you can do to prepare to tackle The Blank Foreigner is to LEARN THEIR LANGUAGE. Or carry around a rucksack full of translation books everywhere you go!

3) The Psychic

Psychics are impossible to spot, until it’s too late. They look like every other girl. The act like every other girl. But there is a difference.

They can read your mind.

Allow me to elaborate:

You see a really cute girl walking in the street. You consider approaching her, but you have AA. Wait, fuck it, remember what Andy said! Just do it! Ok, let’s do it!

But the SECOND you decide that you ARE going to approach her, she hails a taxi, darts into a shop, pulls out her phone or starts running in the other direction.

Dammit! What are the chances?

This is a common occurrence for the seasoned Daygamer.

Sometimes you come across a special breed of ‘EvilPsychics’ that prefer to wait till the very second you’re about to open before they get on the phone, dart into a shop, or run for a bus. They get a kick out of knowing that they thwarted you right at the last moment.

The only way to combat a psychic in my experience is to show her that you WILL NOT BE DENIED!

“Oh you’re making a phone call? It’s too bad that I’m gonna have to interrupt the call”

“You’ve disappeared into Topshop? Well, I guess now I’ve gotta go in there after you!”

You get the idea.

Don’t let a psychic win. Show her that she can read your thoughts all she wants – you are the kind of man who doesn’t take no for answer. You see Psychic’s test men just like other girls, e.g, but putting up a bit of token resistance, only they do it before you’ve even approach! They test your INTENTION to approach. The only way to win is the APPROACH! Once she see’s that her psychic abilities are no match for your raw masculine determination you’ll have her melting all over her glass ball.

4) The Ninja

I will tell you now that closing a ninja is impossible.

Have you ever closed a Ninja?

No?

That’s because it’s impossible.

Ninja’s are out there on the streets – and like the psychics, are disguised as normal girls. Ninja’s aren’t psychic… at least I don’t think they are. All I know is.. is that they seem to know what I’m going to do and when I’m going to do it. I can only assume it’s down to their secret ninja skills.

The following is a prime example of a ninja at work.

I’ll be out teaching a student, looking for some nice girls for him to approach. In the distance there is a pedestrian clearing – a large space open to the public – it is totally deserted except for one lone girl. She is very sexy indeed.

Perfect I think.

I turn to my student and tell him to approach that sexy girl over in that clearing.

“What girl?” he says.

I point to the clearing. “That girl…….” and realise that I’m pointing into open space.

The girl has vanished.

The wind picks up, and out of the corner of my eye I see a blurred shadow pass by one of the rooftops. Nothing is left in the space where she was apart from some dust in the air, slowly settling after what looks like some kind of disturbance moments before.

That girl was a ninja. And ninja’s don’t like to talk to strangers.

5) The Mirage

We tend to trust our senses. The more hard-headed of you tend not to believe something until you see it for yourselves. I know I didn’t truly believe this pick-up stuff could work untill I saw someone else do it with my own eyes.

But sometimes our eyes can play tricks on us. What appears to be there at first, ends up not being there.

Like WMD’s in iraq (erm.. andy.. this isn’t really the time to get polital. Let’s stick to girls ok?)

Maybe things can CHANGE before your eyes. They look like one thing, then as you get closer, you realise that it’s something completely different.

This, unfortunately, occurs far too often in Daygame. So often infact you start to question your very senses.

One minute you are strolling up to who you think is Miss Sweden 2009, then just as you say hello and she turns round, you realise you’re actually talking to Miss Basildon 1983.

In your head all you can hear is your mental co-pilot screaming “EJECT” EJECT! EJECT!”, but it’s too late. You’ve opened, and now you’ve gotta stick with it. Running is an option, but definitely a rude thing to do. Best thing to do is ask for direction then politely thank her an be on your way.

You can clean your eyeballs with a wire brush when you get home.

6) The Boyfriend

I think these characters are related to Ninjas.

If not by blood, then definitely by association. They know their ways.

Dressed as regular people they move fast and unseen, camouflaged in a sea of innocent people.

Then out of nowhere they appear then vanish just as suddenly, taking with them the girl of your dreams who only seconds before you had just fallen in love with.

Sometimes they strike before you get a chance to approach.

You see  the girl, build up the courage to go and speak to her, then seconds before impact, he appears in a cloud of smoke, whisks her off her feet and carries her off into the sunset.

Other times it’s not quite so simple.

You’re walking along the highstreet.

You’ve walked this path many times before. You know every shop, every slab of pavement, every tree. You barely pay attention.

Then you see her. Suddenly you’re world comes alive. What was once a grey, dull landscape is now made up of bright vivid colours.

Life is beaufiful.

She is beautiful.

Dazzling.

You must talk to her.

But I can’t… she’s out of my league… there’s no way she’d like someone like me… no… no.. come on.. what did Andy say?  What was Matthew Hussey’s line again?….  “If you can’t, you must!”

I can’t….

so I MUST!

Fuck it, you adjust your course and head straight towards her.

Your heart suddenly decides to let you know you’re doing something silly.

Your stomach feels left out, so jumps on the jolly bandwagon.

Now your legs are in on the action.

Shit, too late to turn back now…

“Hi… excuse me…. sorry to bother you, I just saw you walking past and…”

Suddenly a caped man swoops down from the sky and embraces the beautiful girl in his arms of steel, kisses her on the lips and then turns to you with a smile.

“Hiya mate, what’s up?”

“um…. i just…… um…. wondered if you knew where Leicester Square is?”

Phew – good thing you’re quick on your toes – catastrophe averted!

(seriously though, if this ever happens to me I just tell the truth, then compliment the guy on his taste in women and say he’s a lucky guy and shake his hand. It shows the guy respect, and I’ve never had a single bad response – even if the guy did have arms of steel!)

7) The Dad

You see the girl waiting on the corner of a street, and decide to approach (hopefully thanks to my advice!). You open, she smiles – it looks like you could do quite well.

But wait…

Something’s wrong…

A disturbance in the force.

A glitch in the matrix.

Suddenly you realise.

What you had previously thought was a film poster advertising the latest brutal action film with the cage fighting lookalike lead actor glaring out from under the film title, is infact, a massive scary cage fighting man glaring at you infront of a what you can now see is a Disney film poster.

There’s no mistaking this man. It’s The Dad.

Now let’s get something clear; The Dad does not like you.

You could be the nicest guy in the world, and could have opened in the most charming way possible. It makes no difference.

Unlike her mum, sister or friends, this man knows what men are like, and will assume you are the worst of them. As you stand there trying to keep your breathing in check, he is imagine you doing things to his daughter that would definitely not make the cut in that Disney film.

His precious daughter.

His angel.

His princess.

You are in big trouble. You have seconds to act, or this interaction is over.

As far as I can see it, you have three options:

1) Run – you’ll get away, but the number is unlikely unless she runs after you!

2) Quickly revert you’re opener to an indirect opener. You’re just a friendly guy asking for directions. You definitely do NOT want to do anything with this girl that The Dad would not happily agree to. Start talking to The Dad as soon as you can. Charm him. Win him over. Make him laugh. Make him like you. Once he likes you, you are in with a chance. At the end of the interaction either ask him if it would be ok to grab his daughter’s number (risky, but can work), or better still, tell them about this party you’re having in a few weeks and both should come down. The number close should be easy from here – obviously you don’t want the dad coming to any party of yours – you can just tell her later that the party has been cancelled and game as normal. The key is that you got the number.

3) If you’ve already gone direct and the dad knows exactly what you’re up to, turn you’re attention immediately to The Dad and engage him in the interaction. Tell him the direct opener. Tell him what you’re saying about the daughter – this way it looks like you’re almost asking his permission, or seeking his approval – so he will feel you are being very respectful. If he responds well then you are in with a chance. If he doesn’t then you might want to consider reverting back to option 1.

——–

If I discover any more dastardly villains out there I will upload a revised article. For everyone reading this, If you know of another daygame foe that I’ve overlooked please let me know!

Andy Yosha
(http://www.puatraining.com/andyyosha)

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HB Pirate Girl YAARRR!

10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?

9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?

8. Come on up and see me urchins.

7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.

6. I’d love to drop anchor in your lagoon.

5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?

4. How’d you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?

3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.

2. Well blow me down?

1. Prepare to be boarded.

Happy Talk Like a Pirate DAY!!!

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Click on link above for the video ;-)

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Was teaching a student on sunday, and I’d previously told him that I’d gotten a couple of street kisses before and he really wanted me to demo it.

It told him that it wasn’t an easy thing to do, but I’d try my best (i’m always up for a challenge). Also the last girl he tried to open had headphones on and he failed to make her stop, so this was a sticking point at the moment and also wanted me to demo stopping a girl with headphones on. And as luck would have it the next hot girl we saw had headphones on.

So in I go (direct as usual!)

She stops, and we get into a fun interaction.

I do a little bit of kino by highfiving her at a highpoint in the conversation and spinning her round, but apart from that I didn’t really escalate at all. I was just getting to know her and qualifying her a bit. But after a few minutes I wanna start seeing if there was any way I could get that kiss…

The battery in my phone is off, so I get her to save my number in her phone.

She says “What shall I save you as… Andy what?”

I tell her “Andy Good Kisser”

She agrees, with a smile, and saves my number.

Then I get a bit closer and tell her I have to go meet my friend, and it was awesome meeting her.

I tell her “Give me a kiss on the cheek”

She complies. It’s a soft kiss, near my lips. *green light*

I point to my other cheek.

Another soft kiss, near my lips. *green light*

As she pulls away from the third kiss, I stay close, then pulling her into me, kiss her.

I pull away with a smile, with strong eye contact, then go in for a second kiss.

Probably the best demo I’ve ever done  ;D – I’ve gotta point out that this is only the 3rd of 4th time I’ve kissed a girl on the street like this – I’m not some kind of street kiss close pimp. This probably won’t happen again for a long time!

Good fun anyway :)

Andy Yosha
(http://www.puatraining.com/andyyosha)

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There are guys out there who are INCREDIBLE at getting women attracted to them and wanting to sleep with them, these men look like rockstars and on the surface seem like they get laid every other night.  The sad fact is though that they don’t because they lack the final skillset, the one thing every guy at some point must master….the ability to sexually escalate.

Like all of game there are two components to being able to sexually escalate, outer game and inner game.  The outer game is incredibly simple but the inner game is what causes 99% of the problems.  I’ll list the key problems guys have with sexually escalating.

The outer game part consists of only two things. 

1) Smoothly running up the kino escalation ladder so that every new advance is comfortable and natural

2) Pulling the trigger when the time is right

With number one it’s just a continuation of the kino you’re building off the bat.  If you’re doing solid game your kino should have been escalating naturally throughout the pick up anyways, if not then you have a serious sticking point that needs to be addressed from the initial pick up.  The second part just means a strong kino jump and having the ability to go “cave man”.  When we pull the trigger we forget about “gaming”, the game is done and now it’s time to go for what we made happen.

Simple enough right?  The format is pretty basic and down right easy, the real problems come from our heads.  While the action of pulling the trigger is nothing, actually letting yourself do it is a whole different story.  Here’s the three major inner game issues regarding sexual escalation and how you can get around each one.

1) Fear of failing after getting so close

When it’s time for end game and sexual escalation there’s been serious investment on your part for this girl.  She doesn’t feel like just another set anymore since you had to work for her and spend time on her.  After opening, hooking, building comfort, creating attraction, handling her friends, dealing with logistics, and getting either a number or kiss close, the last thing you want to do is mess it up now.  The way to deal with this is by understanding two things.  First she IS just another set and you have to be willing to fail just as if you were only opening.  Even if it blows up in your face it doesn’t take away from the fact that you were able to get up to that point.  By remembering this you’ll feel OK to fail and wont place so much value on the girl.  Second make the mental shift from investing your time and energy into the girl to investing it into your game.  By investing in the girl and the interaction you begin to put heavy emphasis on everything and begin fearing to mess up.  By investing in developing your game you realize you HAVE to pull the trigger otherwise you’ll never learn and get better.  Like Nike says “just do it”.

2) Assume sex

Think about this for a second.  She’s in your bed and has shown obvious signs of attraction all night.  I can almost guarentee she wants it to and it is true that women enjoy sex as much as men (if not more).  Start thinking about what’s going through her mind, “Why wont he go for it already?” ”I gave him enough signs, I hope he mans up” “God I’m horny! He better make a move!”.  Obviously you don’t know what’s going through her mind but the point is you assume it since it’s most likely true and will lead you to taking action that’s best for the pick up.  Understand that women enjoy sex as much as men do (if not more) but because of their social conditioning can not allow themselves to be responsible for doing anything that can lead the interaction to sex.  She also EXPECTS you to sexually escalate since you’re a man, it’s normal and not low value to want sex…in fact if you don’t go for it she’s left to either think you don’t like her, you’re a wimp, or you’re gay. What this boils down to is that it’s on you, don’t let her down.

3) Immersion

To often are analytical game heads seriously get in the way at this stage.  In the example I gave you about myself I remember clearly analyzing all the possible kino escalation moves I could do to try and make it smooth, but then remembered the idea of immersion and stopped all that.  The idea is that it shouldn’t feel robotic or structured since it’d make it bad for you and probably feel creepy to the girl.  Instead turn your mind off and let your body do what it’s naturally meant for.  When we feel immersed we go on primal instinct and let the situation flow, allowing it to be as natural as possible and to fully enjoy it as well.  To do this just relax yourself and notice the pleasant way she smells, how nice and smooth her skin feels.  Allow yourself to fully enjoy the moment with her and fully accept your arousal and desires.  Let your hands wander where they want as well as your lips.  Basically stop worrying so much and simply enjoy yourself.

If you don’t fear messing up since you understand it’s just another skillset to practice, assume it’s on and feel confident escalating, and allow yourself to be immersed and enjoying it so your head doesn’t interfere, there’s really no reason why you shouldn’t be able to sexually escalate.  Go out there and pull the trigger!

Hope this helps,

Psych

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One of the many objectives a PUA has is to get a girl ‘in state’ as when a girl is in state it makes seduction and escalation much more rapid. The better you become at state control the less time and effort you will need. People will not see you ‘gaming’ because you will be too fast! It is called being seductive. As we all know people use many different ways to get her in the right state. Might be through NLP, kino routines, stories, a ‘YES LADDER’ etc. etc. there are so many ways. Some guys even tell a girl what they find attractive in a women or use a 3rd person and loan behold the girl then starts behaving in that way. A natural uses his frame and aura to get her in the zone without any tricks. The way he talks, touches her, eye/lip movement, smile, you name it! He has the touch.

So the place where I believe you will find girls in a positive frame?

If they have just finished watching the film ‘THE YES MAN’

Serious, go on the pick up outside there because whole film is like one big Yes ladder. People are in an adventureous state and it may not last long! Play on the sense of being open to new experiences or people. I have a feeling this is going to become a popular Day2 dvd choice.

Let me know results

Take it easy guys

Pete :-)
P.S. Hopefully you will run into HBs who have seen that film oppose to some deep Russian tragegy….. But in fact that will be cool too because they will need comfort. In fact I’ve found a cinema is a great place because people tend to feel very open and emotional in one way or another as they have been on a journey. So depending on what film they have seen, you will have to adapt the angle you are coming in at. It is great fun!

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However other then that the best tool for Pick Up is…drum roll please….the CAMERA.

Many people when given this question will sometimes say a pen and paper (or buisness card) but in reality, with skilled application, the camera will win hands down every time. Also note by camera I mean a digital camera where you can see the pictures right away.

What makes it so special? Well first of all it allows for quickly getting in close and helps break possible kino barriers, such as putting your arm around her waist. Or making multiple other forms of kino socially acceptable… 

It’s also fun and builds comfort to look at pictures that the two of you take together and can be easily used to break rapport and tease her. You can incorprate role playing into it by taking “bad ass” pictures.

goofy faced pictures

pictures of her kissing your cheek.

and of course se%y pictures…

Other benefits are actually for working the room and not so much the girl. This is what many refer to as flash game. When you’re in the club and you take a picture of yourself with a hot girl, or two, or three…lol, the flash has everyone look over and guess what every girl in the club will see. Instant pre-selection. It makes you the center of attention and the party…since girls are validated by attention (men are validated through physicality) and want to be with the party they’ll naturally gravitate to you!

If you’re identity is that of a photographer it’s obviously a great way to ground yourself to the girl and bring her into your world. Finally the camera can be used in any stage of the PU.

One of my best default openers involves the camera. I go up to the girl and tell her to take a picture of me and my friends, once she does (social norms demand it) I can then tease her LIGHTLY to break rapport or reward her for compliance and build comfort. Then I’ll usually build comfort a bit and take a picture with her to help with attraction.

You can also use the camera in qualification by having her pose for you while you take a picture, either with you and her or just her. By having her try to look good for the picture she invests and works for you, also you take a high value role by telling her what to do and leading the interaction. Finally when it’s all said and done you take an approval role letting her know what you think of the picture which solidifies the attraction. Having a digital camera that also can record video is definately a bonus as well. As for sexual escalation and the bedroom…well use your imagination ;)

-Jarett aka Psych

P.S.- Should a girl ever open you by asking you to take a picture of her and her friends (always a good sign!) a great little trick is to get them ready and posing and then take a picture of yourself with THEIR camera! This will get a laugh and then you can take a picture of them, after that you can optionally have some other guy take a picture of you and all the girls (remember flash game).

P.S.S- If anyone has other fun ideas on how to use a camera in field make sure and post a comment!

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Day game, Night Game, Friendly, Direct, Subtle, Drunk, DHV, Social Proof, Confident, Telegraphing interest, shy, introverted, personal, impersonal, work related, comforting, helping, complimenting and the list goes on…

Bars, clubs, streets, shopping malls, cafe’s, busses, trains, parks, grocery stores… There are billions of places and ways to approach and have great interactions with women that lead to bonding and relationships.

This is my way of meeting people… I walk up to them wherever they may be and I say or do a few things that causes them to respond to me in a positive way. They like me instantly, if they don’t then I keep changing my strategy until i do something that  they do like or if I have calculated that the subject is not worth my time or that the subject is no longer worth pursuing I simply abandon that particular Approach.

I never take the Approach seriously and I always enjoy and anchor positivity to meeting new people even if they aren’t always as nice as I am. You cannot reject someone you don’t know!

If you want to become a master of getting women into your life and have the feeling every day in all places that if a woman who you like the look of and wanted to find out what she was like came into your vicinity you would know without hesitation that you could A. Approach her and B. Make her a friend and even a girlfriend if you really felt a connection with her then read on!

In my average day I usually speak to about 25 people I have never met in my life, that is a considerably smaller amount than a few years ago. I live for the Approach, I love the Approach and I want to help you love the Approach as much as I do.

What is an Approach?

An Approach is where in some way you make the effort to establish a relationship with someone. The way I usually approach is by walking up to someone and saying “Hi.” That is what is known as an opener… my style of opening is very simple and it gives me a very good indication weather the recipient of my Approach is worth another second of my time.

Hi!

Observation and monitoring are vital in the next few seconds as you are going to have to do something… depending on the way she responds you could either follow on with a sincere question, statement, story or you could ignore the recipient and carry on about your day. This is serious stuff!!! to be taken lightly

Once you have delivered your opener (there are many variations of openers) and the recipient has responded in such a way that you have decided is worthy of a few more seconds of your time you need to have something bright to say… what i mean is that you probably think she is worth your time and you best do or say something so that she enjoys the approach and reciprocates your desire to find out more about her… a twinkle in her eye and she bights her lip a little and smiles.

Yes, you are both smiling at each other whilst maintaining eye contact which neither of you want to break… you like each other. You chat for 5 minutes but she has to soon and sensing that, you come up with an exit strategy to allow her to leave feeling good about herself whilst you leave feeling equally as good and looking forward to meeting her for a second time in a few hours or possibly a few days time. This is a great feeling!

It’s doesn’t always go as smoothly as this which is why picking the right target is so important.

Sometimes it happens more smoothly with little emotional peaks and sometimes with more emotional peaks.

The most important thing in Approaching people I have to say is that you sincerely feel like meeting the girl will be fun and enjoyable. If you feel this way then you are going to love Approaching people and they are going to love being approached by you. Why? Because no woman can refuse a good feeling. What I mean is that people bounce feelings of each other all day and people will allow themselves to pick up the positive feelings from another person but rarely will they hang about for another split second if a person is going to bring them down.

The truth of the matter is that we all love feeling good inside… we all want to feel better every day in every way for as much of the day if possible. We have different ways of feeling different things which is why we do everything we do. Even negative things we do to ourselves are done to experience a positive feeling… smoking is an example.

Now that we know that we (especially women) want to feel good I will explain how Seal (the scared singer who is not rated as being attractive) was able to date and marry a woman considered to be one of the most beautiful and successful women in the world, Heidi Klum.

First let me ask if you’ve listened to that song of Seals called “Kissed by a Rose?” It’s quite a moving song isn’t it. The thing that he has that enabled him to date “such a beautiful woman” is the emotions of comfort, love, fun, joy, connection, relaxation, sincerity, caring, affection and more… much more. These are all really nice feelings and Seal has them in abundance.

Lets look a little closet at those specific sensations that Seal experiences and allows those around him to experience

1. Comfort… being comfortable within yourself is a more desirable sensation than dating a woman and women will not want to be in relationship with someone who is not comfortable with themselves. You have to be COMFORTABLE with yourself! There are no two ways about it. If you aren’t comfortable within yourself then you need to address the areas of your life that are responsible for how comfortable you feel. A few of those areas might include

A. Where and how you live
B. Bringing in enough money to survive comfortably
C. feeling happy about the direction your life is going in
D. Getting enough sleep to have enough energy to be comfortable

2. Love… hmmm this is an interesting one. You must love yourself and love people, love animals and be a lovely person. You must have the potential to love someone and that you do have in abundance so don’t worry about that one. You can express that you are a lovely person by the thoughts you have towards other people and towards yourself. Do you treat yourself well?

3. Fun… How much fun do you have in a given day? Do you enjoy your life? Are you able to have natural fun without the aid of negative substances including cigarets, alcohol or Drugs. You should be having more than enough natural fun. If you aren’t then again you need to think about readjusting your lifestyle to get things back in order

If you are approaching women hoping that they will be your source of pleasure and good feelings you are already setting yourself up for failure. If you feel the way some like Seal must have felt when he attracted his woman you will be able to achieve a similar quality result… think about it!

4. I’ll write about these ones later: joy, connection, relaxation, sincerity, caring, affection

Anyway, I’m sure you can work it out for yourself.

How to get from where you are to where you want to be?

Get yourself away from your computer, get outside and start walking up to people and saying “Hi.” Approach with the intention of making the other persons day better. You should always be thinking about the other person and how you can make their experience of life more pleasant.

Wishing you all the best

Richard Macilwaine

Approaching is becoming more fun for you right now! You are begining to see how you could enjoy it and want to do it more because you see how you could make other people feel awesome ;)

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When I first started the game I had the pleasure of being able to devote all of my time to developing new ideas and theories based on my own experience in field and research which helped alter the way thousands of people around the world approached the game. Unfortunately I’ve been so busy teaching recently that I’m just not getting the time I wanted to write up all my new theories and findings. However there was a little something I’ve been researching recently which gives a slightly new perspective to an old game we’ve been playing.

Those who’ve studied with me will be aware of my method of starting from comfort and exploiting social proof for all it’s worth. Well it turns out that actually a lot of my methods are not only backed up in the psychological studies I’ve mentioned in my own works but also by numerous other studies that where to demonstrate something other than attraction, that of conformity.

This is an area I knew quite a lot about, though with my fixation on attraction I had kind of left those thoughts and ideas on a back burner whilst I concentrated on what I thought where more beneficial pursuits. However with the revamped puatraining blog it has given me an excuse to write up something which I originally put together to amuse myself. Essentially it is a re-working of Dr Robert Cialdini’s work on influence with a slight twist towards attraction. The similarities between his work and my own theories of attraction only went to further my own belief in the formula for why we get attracted to others, but also his work serves as a great lesson in teaching us how to influence the behaviour of girls we’re interested in and how to influence their decision over who they’re attracted to. Essentially it makes a great alternative to building attraction with someone.

Reciprocation

We’re brought up in a society where we believe it’s correct to give something in return for any gifts we receive. This concept of a token economy where everything is traded is almost hardwired into our brains. Doing something for someone else almost guarantees that they will feel a need to do something in return. Go out of your way to help someone and see how confused they get. They often don’t understand why you’ve done it and feel they should do something in return.

Some of the best openers involve helping girls take pictures of themselves in a nightclub, or helping someone find their way when they’re lost. Adding value in this way almost always insures an easy transition into conversation with someone. As once you’ve done something nice for them or added value in some way your target is almost assured to feel like they owe you good conversation and friendliness if nothing less.

Concession

We almost always feel bad for letting someone down. If asked to perform a large task and refused the chances that someone will accept a smaller favour has a much higher chance of being accepted. Randomly stopping a girl in the street and asking her to marry you will almost certainly get you refused. However if you then take the time to sit with her and talk instead you’re likely to find she accepts this concession as she feels bad for rejecting you in the first place.

As conversation with someone is far less of a commitment than marriage she is more willing to comply, which of course makes it easy to run your game. This principle applies to almost any area of game from suggesting a full on dinner date then reducing it to a coffee right down to a holiday away for 2 months which then reduces down to a fun weekend away.

Consistency

People like to be seen as reliable. If someone confirms they will do something they tend to follow through with it. Getting a girls phone number is one thing, getting her to reply to your messages is another. Try sending her the message in front of her whilst you’re still in set. This way she knows you’ve seen her receive it. Tell her to make sure when she replies she sends something witty as most people send you boring work texts. Once she confirms that she’ll send the message her chances of actually responding to you will sky rocket, and dramatically reduce your flake rate.

Social Validation

People follow others, countless studies have been done to show just how good humans are at conforming to a group. It’s easier to go along with a crowd than to try and stand in the way of a tide of people. If a crowd of people all began looking up at a building your urge to do the same would be directly proportional to the amount of people looking up. One person may not even get you to bat an eyelid in the direction of the rooftop, however once 100 people began doing it you’ld take the time to have a quick peek yourself.

The concept of Social proof and pre-selection couldn’t be more compounded by this fact. If you’re surrounded by beautiful women who think you’re interesting other women have no hope but to accept you must be doing something right. Therefore you must be interesting and attractive to beautiful women. Adding girls to your life will only continue to increase your attraction to the opposite s%x.

Likeability

Obviously the more someone likes you the more they are likely to… well to be honest like you. Build rapport with someone, don’t be afraid to be friendly or feel you have to be nasty to someone just because they’re hot. Once they are friends with you your ability to game them and wind them up only increases. Negging a hot girl may seem like a great idea, but if they don’t really like you you’ll only end up with them walking away. Do the same neg after they like being in your company and instead of walking away you’ll find yourself building some pretty deep attraction.

Authority

One of the biggest mistakes I hear students repeat in set is asking a girl what she wants. Whether it is asking if they would like to go back to your house, or whether they would like to give you their phone number. These kinds of questions show a lack of authority and often result in a simple no for an answer. Many studies have shown that we respond incredibly well to authority. Don’t ask her what she wants to do, tell her.

Replace would you like to give me your phone number with; just give me your phone number and I’ll send you a text. Replace would you like to come to mine with; lets go back to mine for a quick drink. By leading the situation you’re far more likely to find her conforming to your wishes.

These techniques have been taught for years as a means of influencing others decisions from sales people to politicians, however with a bit of subtle tweaking and thought it’s easy to transfer it to a simple system to breakdown how to guide your actions within the game and dramatically increase your success in areas that may have been lacking.

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Rapport is what will get you laid!

You need to be a master of rapport if you want to get anywhere with girls. If you click, it’s on, if you don’t click… GAME OVER! How are you able to bond quickly with a girl so she feels really nice and comfortable around you?

Your intentions are the underlying factor which govern your behaviour, what you say, how you move, when you kino her etc. It’s all about what you think about yourself and what your intensions are.

Women are all different and they are all looking for different things, some are looking for an adventurous bad boy while others are looking for a friendly chilled out guy and some… in fact most are looking for a guy who is a combination of the two. You have to be able to understand the feedback she gives you when you approach and then keep changing your approach untill you do or say something that she likes. If you approach with a direct opener and see that she is slightly shy the you will need to change your strategy  QIUCKLY or she will be gone and you will have to find a new target.

Rapport is the main ingredient for girls to want to hang out with you and be nice around you. If you are uncalebrated… ie, you say something that isn’t true She WILL PICK IT UP… GAME OVER. Be honest at all times and try to tell stories from your own life and most importantly be interested in who she is and what she says to you. Far to many guys out there are caught up in thinking about what they are going to say next… This is no good.

When you’re hanging out with your guy  friends chatting about sport or whatever else you chat about, do you think of what to say to your friends next so they think you are a cool guy? I DOUBT IT. If so then you definitly need to get out and do about 100 approaches every day for a few months. Aim to make those approaches last as long as 5 minutes.

Rapport happens when people share similar thoughts, similar beliefs, similar style of dressing, similar music, similar places they live in… basically when people have things in common there will be rapport and thats it! Having things in common with a hot girl will make her feel more comfortable arond you.

So what you have to do is become agreeable with hot babes, become more understanding, be more agreeable and show them that somehow you understand them and you sympithise with them and watch how they like you a lot more. They will give their time to you and let you escalate the relationship… they will alow themselves to be taken by you!

For example, if you were on holiday in a totaly different country where there werent many people from your country ever and you just happended to meet someone else from your country maybe down at a beach or maybe in a bar. So you get talking to this person from your country and they tell yoy a story about their city… WHAT? They actually live in your city… the rapport deepens, you feel more conected with this person. So you ask where about in the City are they from… WOW they are from the same area as you. Which street do they live on they ask you. They live at the top of your road. They know all the same places as you do and they even know some of the same people you know. THIS IS RAPPORT. You are so deeply connected now. You will feel comfortable with this person because they are so much like yourself.

Isn’t that interesting… we like people who are like ourselves. To some up how you can build rapport with anyone from anywhere in the world you need to listen closely to what they say and try to connect on some of the words they use. Try to bond somehow or show that you know a little about their world and their experience.

In my live Approaching videos I demonstrate how to get rapport with really Attractive girls. I hope you have time to check them out as they will really help your game. You will be able to see exactly what I’m talking about when i say build rapport by having things in common and sometimes the things I have in common are really simple things but they are enough to make a connection with a girl. I get phone numbers and go on dates all the time with beautiful women who like me because I learnt how to connect with them emotionally using the techniques of rapport.

all the best

Richard Macilwaine

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