Other Men……? Not an issue!
This post is in response to replies to my last post on being (‘Free of Control in a Relationship’) An off topic came up and I also have had e-mails from people around the world worrying about the same thing. The subject being other men and a woman’s past. The general concern is relating to PUA’s. Guys worrying that PUA’s have some special powers to steal their women.
I quote a reply from previous post
“Dear Sweeney,
I have a question. Becomes you know how guys tend to present their s$x lives like they sweep women with some magic spell and f@%k them silly then toss them to the curb like they were some 20p toy.
sometimes i think shit. what if this girl im dating like got f@%ked on a one night stand or got spitroasted by some hot PUA guys like you read it in the field reports. its like gahhh. yes its great for them but i wouldnt want their left overs and sometimes i worry like could ALL women fall for that spell? because pua guys make it seem like they could casually f@%ck any woman and toss her out.”
This is really not about any other man’s sexual abilities or strengths but the route of the matter is a person’s own insecurities and lack of self worth. You really have to value yourself and realise there are things you can offer that no other man be (film star, MPUA, natural, whatever…..) can. Indentifying those qualities and embracing them in a non-egocentrically way is the way to have great inner game! However on a bigger scale the more you learn about yourself, the more you will become aware of what will make you happy in any kind of a relationship and not what you THINK will make you happy but the qualities in a person that will! The key to being able to identify the kind of partner that will actually bring something to your life and make you happy and then you will stop wasting your time trying make gorgeous loss causes work with game and manipulation. (See my last post on ‘Letting go’)
From a logical or ‘Game’ perspective other guys are really not a problem. They only become an issue if you let them in your head and then all your silly insecurities rage to the service in a needy way which repels them. The reason other guys are no competition is a thing called PAIR BONDING. When two people have s&x, oxytocin and Endorphins are released, which helps bond the relationship. This is much stronger in women. When it is released during orgasm, it begins creating an emotional bond — the more s*x, the greater the bond. That is why it is important not to put the stunningly beautiful, well brought up, good morals, ‘not that kind of girl’ on a pedestal and be scared of escalating out of respect. She wants a guy to lead her to that place even if she hasn’t been there often. That is all MPUA’s do because they know this and know it is all about creating sexual comfort! MPUA’s do this rapidly hence they don’t spend months like other guys getting a girl to be sexual with them. So you see others guys are just not to be worried about because they DON’T have that bond with her. So a woman can see the most sexual and stunningly good looking guy in the world and look at him in amazement but still not act on it or even want to. If a girl is totally in love with me Brad Pitt couldn’t game her off me, there are things I can offer her that Brad can’t (and vice versa but I am sure he is happy with Angie so I’m safe ;-) you should have the same attitude.
I regularly have ‘Top PUA’s’ asking me for advice, they have issues too. However what gives top PUA’s a ‘glow’ apart from over the top non-natural marketing is that they understand
Sexual dynamics and escalation
Themselves (the foundation)
And have a real sense of inner confidence because they know how to be their most attractive self.
That differs from PUA to PUA. However that is all you can hope for….. ‘To be your most attractive self,’ what more could you ask for and then you will feel happy and be coming from a place of abundance and peace. And remember, as my good friend Gambler says ‘Anything that another human can do is learnable by you’ that is why our bootcamps and events are always full of people learning these things…….. Otherwise we wouldn’t be in business.
So if……
You are able to identify and embrace your individual attractive qualities and what you’re ACTALLY looking for in a partner.
Are able to be your ‘most attractive self’ through natural game
And finally you’re having s$x with your partner therefore strengthening the bond each time.
So it does not matter if ‘Mr. Super big balls MPUA super s”x star dripping in s@x appeal’ comes along she is bonded to you not him and his presence should not affect or intimidate you just a great opportunity to display your security and strength.
Finally you CAN NOT be jealous of her past so don’t bother. One of the top 3 qualities of millionaires and leaders is they don’t spend time worrying about things that they have no control over. You can’t control her past but you can control your future together. Using the 3 things above will help to make that a brighter future and with no fear of other men.
Much Love
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