New Year, New Impression. How to cut your work in half!

By Karl on January 13, 2012 Comments: 1

Hey guys,

Wow, I can’t believe it has been so long since I last posted! Jumping on the New Year bandwagon this is actually a post I meant to put up around November but never got around to it.

 

The Background.


When with a student I like to refer to how important a first impression is. If your first impression isn’t strong, you face a battle to make up lost distance, and then prove to her that you are a cool guy worth spending time with.

Now a few people might have read that and start crying out old pick-up mantras: ‘But I’m the prize! She should want to game me!’ Let’s be honest with ourselves here, none of that is true… at least not straight away.

You only become the prize once you have proven you are the prize. Very few girls will actively view you straight away as someone to be chased and invested in without you having shown them why. It can happen, but only in special circumstances. In a regular bar, nightclub or in the street, you need to show them why you are worth the effort.

And all this comes down to making a good first impression.  By doing this you are cutting out a great deal of work for yourself, as most of the qualities you need to convey, aside from conversational ability and escalation ability, can be demonstrated in that initial moment. That’s why we are going to have a look at these qualities and go through how to show them effectively in this post.

 

The Breakdown

 
First let’s break this down into two sections, the initial look, and the initial contact. The initial look is what they see when they first look at you. The first judgement they will make. It comes in three parts:
1) Fashion.
2) Body language.
3) Value in the environment.

Each of these three things are related to your overall value. If all three (minimum two out of three) are high, then you come across as a high value guy and the girl is more likely to be open to you approaching, forcing IOI’s, etc. Without them, it will naturally be more of an uphill battle.
The initial contact comes in when you actually open your mouth and deliver the opener, and comes in four parts.
1) Eye contact.
2) Body language.
3) Vocal tonality.
4) Proximity.

 

Together these four things make the strongest impression when making contact. Strong eye contact is a sign of a comfortable, secure and confident man. This is especially true when combined with relaxed body language.

 

By having a voice that is paced (by which I mean you aren’t speaking too fast), this shows an air of dominance and authority. Notice how good public speakers pause and slow down as they say their key points. It is the same theory here.

 

Finally, your proximity (how close you are standing) to them will grab their attention and make sure they have noticed you. The ideal distance is right on the edge of their comfort zone. If you want a guide, it would be the same distance from your elbow to the tips of your fingers, if your arm were bent at your side.

 

The worst thing that can happen when you open is not for a girl to say ‘no thanks’ and then to turn away. It is for her to say ‘excuse me?’ (or much more likely in England ‘what?’). If you haven’t got her attention before you open your mouth it is an uphill struggle from there. It is far better to create a good first impression with a bit of thought and effort, and make the work later a bit easier, rather than springing a surprise opinion opener on a girl without her knowing you are going to say something beforehand.

 

So there we have a bit of a mindset (though slightly technical) first post of the New Year for you all. I plan on finishing my Strategy for Nightgame post series soon, but in the mean time if you have any questions on this or my other posts, please do not hesitate to contact me on: karl@puatraining.com

 

 

Until next time!

 

Karl

Tags: , , , , , Categories: Approaching & Opening, Attraction, Club Game, Openers & Routines, Outer Game, Seduction Tips, Uncategorized

Feeling naughty? How to build Sexual Attraction.

By Karl on August 2, 2011 Comments: 5

Hey guys,

 

For this post I really wanted to get something out there that has been in the back of my head for a good few months now: there is more than one type of attraction.

 

 

Now this seems to make perfect sense and yet we do not consciously think about it with pick up. We learn how to create attraction, but do not think about how to utilise each type! We can think, for a working model, that there are two types of attraction: Classic and Sexual.

 

Classic attraction is what we would all think of straight away. The attraction felt between a guy and girl, who then can enter into a relationship, maybe get married etc. etc. It is what has been taught and is achievable through the principles we teach on our Bootcamp’s: opening, building comfort, breakingrapport, qualifying and then closing – either via a date or on the same night.

 

 

What is Sexual attraction?

 

Sexual attraction is built on the same principles. But utilised in a very different way. Instead of the girl viewing you as prospective boyfriend, she will instead view you as a prospective sexual partner, whether it is for the night or multiple times.  A goal for some guys coming on our courses is the idea of having multiple girl friends. In order to achieve this you have to be open and honest if a girl ever asks you about your situation. But what if you didn’t have to?

 

 

Building Sexual attraction achieves this. It goes unsaid that you are a guy with many women: it communicates an abundance mentality. This means that until you start to transition into Classic attraction with the girl, the topic will very rarely come up.

 

The Technique.

 

So how do we build Sexual attraction? Through the same process as building Classic attraction, but with a small twist: everything is as fast as possible.  It should be said that the most common, and easiest, place to build Sexual attraction is in a nightclub, and more difficult in daygame, with a bar scenario sitting slightly more towards the nightclub end. Below are some points to guide you on building Sexual attraction:

1)   The opener should either convey intent (direct). This should not be ‘hi I want to sleep with you’ direct, even ‘hi, I would have kicked myself if I didn’t come over and say hello, what caught my attention is…’ might be too much if the situation doesn’t call for it. The ideal opener would be to force an IOI, followed by walking up to them and saying ‘Hey’.

2)   Break rapport quickly. Due to the direct nature of your opener the intent has already been placed on the line, so escalation can occur quickly. While it is true comfort does need to be built, not nearly as much does for Sexual attraction. The minute she is hooked you want to break rapport.

3)   Qualify her and give her some physical compliance tests, one of which should be a form of isolation. This part is to be fairly short, and between some fluff talk to build a little bit more comfort, but nothing too deep, otherwise it will be incongruent with the image you are putting across.

4)   Escalate hard and fast. Keep the eye contact and introduce pauses. Look at her lips and smile every now and then. Ideally you want to get to a point of holding her hand as quickly as possible, or standing with your arm around her waist. Once one or both of these points have been reached you are ready to K-close, give her some intense eye contact, and slowly draw her in for the kiss.

 

5)   Look to extract. If she is with friends return to the friend group and build some group comfort (mentioned in my last post), all while keeping the kino up with the girl without her friends knowing (there is a great segment on this on the Stealth Attraction DVD set, but an example is caressing her back while your hand is on it).

After you have F-closed her, and if you have taken her number at any point, keep the texts within a close time frame of date times (around a week to five days before). The dates themselves should not be dates so much as a pre-meeting before the bedroom, so ideally a club, bar, or your house. Again, we do not want much comfort building and we are looking to move it to the bedroom as quickly as possible.

 

Points 1-4 above can be achieved in around 5 to 10 minutes when done correctly, although be aware that there will be a small number of girls who just will only respond to Classic attraction.

 

It is also possible to build Classic attraction once you have built Sexual attraction. The method is fairly simple: building more comfort. However it is not as easy to convert from Classic attraction to Sexual attraction.

 

In summary:

  • There are two types of attraction: Classic and Sexual.
  • The method to building both is similar, but Sexual attraction is achieved faster.
  • Classic attraction portrays you as a boyfriend character whereas Sexual attraction does not.
  • It is possible to go from Sexual to Classic attraction fairly easily, but not as easy to go the other way.

 

That brings me to the end of this post. If you have any questions or comment leave them here or send me an email: karl@puatraining.com

 

Until next time!

 

Karl

 

Tags: , , , , , , Categories: Attraction, Club Game, General, Seduction Tips

A Strategy for Nightgame part 2: Bar Game – Picking up Women in Bars

By Karl on May 17, 2011 Comments: 2

Hey guys,

Well I’m not sure about you but I am officially excited that summer is here! The girls instantly seem to get more attractive and people are generally more up for a party.

It also means the rise of something else…bar game! This post will be considerably shorter than my post on club game as most of the skills are the same, and tends to feel less intimidating. Without further delay then…

The Environment.

While the venue itself isn’t as hostile (no loud music, unfriendly door staff, overcrowded dance floor etc.) more social intelligence is required. In a nightclub it is easy to get away with more extrovert behaviour, but in bar it might be wiser to save that part for when you are actually speaking to them.

This is depending on the type of bar you go to of course. Over here in the UK sometimes our bar’s turn into mini clubs later in the night, at which point refer back to my previous post, but for all others this hold’s true.

The Girls.

A girl goes to a bar for a different reason than to go to a club. She goes to the club to have a night out with her friends, get some male attention and mainly forget about normal life for the night.

In a bar she is there to have a laugh and catch up with her friends. When guys say they have difficulty with bitch shields in bars. They tend to not take this fact on board and stand there trying to hit on the girl when she doesn’t particularly want to be. This is the art of bar game. Being able to pick up the girl who doesn’t want to be.

So there are two ways to open:

1)   Use a false time constraint (I can only stay a minute but I wanted to ask/say…) or pre-opener, and re-open later.

2)   Go direct.

I personally always recommend going direct for the sets you are actually interested in. The reason is simple: she knows that you are hitting on her either way. Even if you are asking her the time, why are you asking her and not the guy next to her with a watch on? Going direct owns up to this fact straight away, but you can do it in two ways.

One is to go up to her, friends be damned, and to say it loud. The other is my personal favourite. To force an IOI, smile once more and then to open her once she steps outside for a cigarette/goes to the bar/on her way back from the bathroom. Any of these methods work well so play around with them to find what works best for you.

Running the game.

Once you have opened and are in the set here is your chance to show you ‘get it’. Remember that they are there with their friends. It is important to build group comfort, which is comfort with the group as a whole. I have seen too many students who open well and then only speak to their target the minute they are in set and then get blown out.

Keep the whole group engaged, simply by making sure you give each of them attention, bring them back into the conversation with light kino or eye contact, make sure they all feel involved. Once they are asking you questions in turn it is time to break rapport with your target.

The group should them be comfortable enough with you, as long as you don’t keep ignoring them to let you hit on their friend. Aim for a contact close quickly, stay in conversation for a few more minutes and then leave. You can now go back and set up a date the next day, but if you want to extract, give them a bit of time to carry on the conversation they were having and then rejoin them, ideally with a friend or two.

After that the game run’s itself with a competent wingman. Make sure they are building group comfort as well; otherwise you look bad for bringing them over. The idea of going for an after party or drinks is the ideal method of extraction. To see if this is possible ask a logistical question like  ‘what are you guys doing once this place shuts?’ Be warned do not suggest them coming back then, instead revisit it later. A question like that let’s you know if the set is ‘on’ to go back or not and calibrate your game accordingly.

Summing up.

Bar game is where you go to have good conversations, if those skills aren’t up to scratch, spend a bit of time working on them first. Once you are competent though it is a very rewarding experience. Just bear in mind that if you see two girls and they are in an intense discussion with a scowl on their face it isn’t the best time to open!

The basic pattern is to:

1)   Open briefly, so as to not interrupt the conversation, and then return later.

2)   Build a lot of group comfort and break rapport with your target.

3)   Close, or leave and return later with some friends.

4)   Work for extraction, or close and leave the group.

Comments are always welcome and email me if you have any questions: karl@puatraining.com.

Have fun out there guys, the next in the nightgame series will be…street game!

Karl

Tags: , , , Categories: Approaching & Opening, Attraction, General, Outer Game

What Should a Kiss say to a Woman You Actually Like?

By Karl on April 12, 2011 Comments: 3

Hey guys,

This is a post I have got around to writing pretty quickly. I was giving a talk on our bootcamp last weekend and while covering K-closing technique a thought occurred to me: what should a kiss say?

In the movie Hitch, Will Smith says: ‘8/10 women believe the first kiss will tell them everything they need to know about the relationship.’

The words unsaid...

The words unsaid...

Well while the statistic might not be completely accurate there is certainly truth in it. Just as dancing relates to sex, a kiss can relate to your whole role in a relationship with a woman. What she can expect from a guy both sexually and emotionally.

For instance are you a guy who will lunge forward in the hope he will make the right move? Are you timid to start with and needs some encouragement before finally giving her what she really wants? Are you aggressive and dominant, maybe even to the point of ignoring the signals she is giving you? Or are you be the guy who starts a fire with barely a touch.

What does your kiss say about you?

What does your kiss say about you?

What are we looking for?

We know what we are aiming for, so how do we make her see fireworks? Bear in mind a few things:

  1. Read her actions: what you want is not always what she wants. This is obvious with sex, it is almost more important at this stage as it will communicate that you can be as savvy in the bedroom as you can be in the club, and with that in mind…
  2. Do not be afraid to dominate! We tend to talk about being an alpha male, and leading and being dominant is a key feature of this, so why do some men fall down at the kiss? Make sure that you are showing you can give her that masculine presence she needs all the way through!
  3. Don’t arrive at the party too late! Take the initiative and don’t wait for her to be giving you IOI’s (indicators of interest) akin to stadium lights before you kiss her. But on that note…
  4. Don’t speed. When actually going in for the kiss, which she should know you are doing, don’t be afraid to let some suspense build. It shows sexual confidence that transfers to the bedroom.
  5. One type of firework is boring. Just as flowers every birthday or anniversary, or the same move in bed every night kills a relationship, kissing her in the same way each time kills a bit of the passion. Try not to do the same thing repeatedly. Instead vary your method, keep her guessing, and wanting, more.
  6. Wait for Christmas to open your present. Don’t be too eager. Back off every now and then, many guys start kissing a girl and don’t slow down or sometimes even stop! This can kill off a vibe so make sure you can keep things at a good pace.

The IOI’s you are looking for so you know when to go in for the kiss are simple and easy to spot, the easiest being her looking at your lips. Playing with her hair/neck, blushing and having dilated pupils are all good indicators as well.

http://cdn.lovingyou.com/images/articles/artofkissing.jpg

Everything we crave

Technique

Now everyone has their own techniques that they like to use when going in for the kiss, I myself have a few that I teach to clients, but what about actually kissing her? Follow these few tips to keep these moments varied and explosive:

  1. Kiss her with your eyes first. This is a standard, before you kiss her for the first time let her know what you are about to do by slowing down and looking at her like you are going to kiss her. Tilt your head a bit; maybe lift her chin up a fraction, let her anticipate the moment.
  2. Foreplay is important. Trace certain features with a caressing finger before kissing her. The jaw line, cheek, and especially the lips are all great for building up to the big moment.
  3. Only one thing should get stiff. Relax is a big bit of advice! If you are too stiff and rigid with your kiss then it doesn’t quite scream ‘I am cool with this’ It translates that you are quite nervous and therefore probably don’t get to this point with chicks much.
  4. Get primal. Tug her hair lightly while in a more intense kiss to really kick on the primal level and tap into your alpha male caveman! Bear in mind it should be lightly, unless she is into that sort of thing, in which case you will find out pretty quickly if she is.
  5. Biting got Dracula laid. Biting her lower lip lightly adds a very sensual, but dominating edge to a kiss, but again, if she is into the painful side of sex, you will get back better than you got!
  6. Clean your ears. And hope she cleans hers! The ear is an on show erogenous zone, so make use of it! Whether by giving it a gentle kiss, lick, bite or (a big favourite of mine) just breathing on it, make sure you utilize this area.
  7. Control the French in you. While using a bit of tongue is great, don’t overdo it and go for it every time. Some of the most sexual kisses can be something as simple as looking into her eyes and giving her a brief, but sensual kiss before pulling away. Deprive her a little bit.
  8. Lingering feelings take time to go away. The lips are an incredibly sensitive area of the body, so give both of you a treat and after you kiss her softly, or even before you kiss her at all let your lips just brush over hers. The sensation is highly sexual and yet deprives her of full satisfaction.

So that brings me to the end of another huge post. I hope that this will be of use to some of you. As usual please leave a comment telling me what you think :-)

Until next time!

Karl

Tags: , , , , , Categories: Attraction, Club Game, Comfort, General, Outer Game, Seduction Tips, Uncategorized

The PUA's Toolkit – What Every Pick up Artist NEEDS!

By Karl on April 7, 2011 Comments: 3

Hey guys,

Wow, I haven’t posted in a long time but my other commitments have had me tied up on the blogging front for the last few weeks, I have however got a couple of good ones coming up soon so watch out for them!

And a bit of a divergence from my normal thread for this post but it is something I have been considering a lot recently. At PUATraining we teach about how to game girls like a natural, so we tend not to teach routines as such, but the question has been raised a few time, is there a place for props in natural game?

This led me to do a little bit of analysis and come up with this: The PUA’s Toolkit. This is a list of items which can be used while gaming and which are not part of an elaborate routine and instead can be used just to make an interaction more interesting/exciting.

1. Decision dice. A good friend and wing of mine, Shamwow, first introduced me to the decision dice. His dice have the face with ‘one’ on it replaced by a shark so something similar to this would be great.If you are in set with girls they are brilliant for games i.e. whoever rolls the sharks has to do a forfeit/finish their drink/silly preplanned task. They are small, fit in your pocket and are not noticeable and can be brought out when the inspiration strikes.

2. Belt or a scarf. While they can be good for fashion purposes they are also useful for game. For instance you can establish a limbo on the dance-floor using one. Or you can think even further outside the box and use them for little role-plays for instance making a joke that you have ‘captured’ a girl like in a Wild West movie and then fashion a capture from a belt or scarf (within reason and with consent to continue of course).

3. A pocket vibrator. This is a controversial item and is purely used for escalation, and most of the time in a nightclub scenario when you have already K-closed and are going for a same night lay. The function and purpose is simply to thrill, excite and arouse. It should be used with care and caution however and it is a very high risk/very high reward item.

4. Adult truth or dare app on the iPhone. This is a fantastic app on the iPhone that has built in erotic truth or dare questions and tasks. This is again for escalation and having a bit of fun. While the app is as far as I know only on the the iPhone, you can replicate it in advance/on the spot with a bit of imagination if you do not have access to an iPhone.

5. A camera. This is so you can record memories to enjoy afterwards or can be used as a method of opening by asking them to take a picture etc. They can also be used to build comfort when you have been in set for a while by getting a picture of you, your wing if you have one, and the girls.

6. The High Five. OK while it isn’t an item I feel the need to include it as it can do so much. High fiving someone can add value to them, validate them, build comfort, initiate kino, start an interaction (most of the time on the dance-floor), all depending on the situation it is used in.

7. A music player. This can be speakers, a laptop, a stereo and isn’t to be taken out but instead is used for end game. Music accesses our emotions and it is unwise to forget this. Having a good playlist of songs you enjoy and also help set a mood is invaluable.

This list isn’t in a particular order of course but thinking about how to make an interaction a little bit more exceptional is indeed a noble cause. Remember to apply a bit of social intelligence when deciding when to use some of the items on the list, and if you have any suggestions leave a comment or email me and I will be happy to add it!

Have fun guys!

Karl

Tags: , , Categories: Attraction, Club Game, Entertainment, General, Openers & Routines

Unplugging from the Matrix – Why it Sucks to be Normal!

By Karl on February 21, 2011 Comments: 1

Hey guys,

Firstly I want to say thanks to those who have commented so far, it is always great to get feedback!

For this post I’m going to write about quite a large part of our interactions. All of them, no matter who you are talking to! I am referring to the ‘norm’ or as some other trainers and myself have called it the ‘Matrix’.

So other than being a bad play on a good movie’s name, why did we call it that? Allow me to explain.

The world as we knew it

Remember being a kid, and how carefree everything was? How you could play for hours on your own, or with your friends in imaginary landscapes conjured from your imaginations, making and breaking rules seamlessly just to have a good time?

Maybe you can see children acting this way now, in a restaurant or in a park and you can smile and laugh. We all tend to look back on these times through rose tinted glasses; but there is something enviable about that time of life.

My point is, what happened? When do we go from happily inventing new worlds to settling for the real one? The answer apparently is: we grow up. And quite right too, we come of age, learn to take on responsibilities and move on with our lives but along the way we lose that ability to create something from nothing.

How does this happen? Maybe it is sometime during adolescence when someone says we are ‘uncool’ or ‘weird’. Maybe it is when our social circle seems to grow apart, or something our parents say to us. The bottom line is we start obeying the social norm rigidly. We do not dare to stray from it because if we do we could risk being branded as ‘weird’ or ‘uncool’. In high school/college we usually see regular abuse of someone who doesn’t fit into the social norm there and it is enough to stop us from ever daring to try to bend these apparently rigid social rules.

This reminded some of my fellow trainers and I of the movie ‘The Matrix’ where everyone was plugged into a machine which kept them all obeying a set of rules until it was time for them to be ‘harvested’, and those who dared to question the system were eliminated.

Now how did this ‘norm’ come about? Alpha characters appear to be the answer. They, having the most dominant personality and traits tend to lead others into their way of thinking, and if they are of a certain frame of mind they may use intimidation to get their way. They were originally the instigators of the norm upon us. I must stress that this isn’t a ‘down with Alpha-ness’ rant but rather an explanation of how the norm can be accepted by a person; moving away from pain rather than towards pleasure (negative rather than positively influenced).

Regaining control.

So how do we take back what we have lost? First we need to realise a few things:

  • Most of the social norms are in fact a good for us as a person and as a society, for instance it is a good thing that it is not part of the social norm to lick someone the first time you meet them (an exaggerated example).
  • Many people are perfectly satisfied with the social norms and abiding by them most of the time.
  • People instantly notice when someone deviates from the social norm.

The last point is important. We have all been conditioned to follow the social norm and so if someone isn’t we will notice, and pretty quickly at that.

What we should be doing is giving ourselves permission to step outside the boundaries: to ‘unplug from the matrix’. The goal is not to permanently live outside the box, but every now and then, when the mood strikes, to be free of worrying what everyone else will think and create our own rules, and our own fun for a time.

The reason why we envy the ability for children to have such fun as they do is because it is something we feel we will never have in the same way again. This is false, we can still have that attitude towards having a good time, but instead of playing ‘Space explorers with magic powers’ in a park or garden we will be in a club, bar, staff party, or wherever. The games are different but the outlook is the same: there are no rules and experimenting is good.

Everyone wishes at some point to be able to have that type of fun and experience at some point and the most talked about and sought after friends are usually those who can show that it is possible.

Calibration is key when doing this. As I said previously, most people are perfectly satisfied most of the time. The way the norm is broken is a factor. ‘Peacocking’ in the way of wearing a big top hat and a flashing necklace with a rainbow wig will only appeal to some people in a certain mindset – it is not a sustainable long-term tactic. Dressing well however is a sustainable long-term way of breaking from the social norm that gathers positive attention.

Think of it as breaking rapport with the whole environment. If you go too far you destroy it and it is difficult to regain a favourable position, but if done in the right measure at the right time (i.e. with calibration), others will find themselves irresistibly drawn to you.

It is uncomfortable the first few times you will try but then you develop a bit of indifference and learn to enjoy this freedom again.

Here are some exercises to help you on your way, remember not all are game related, and the purpose it to get you out and breaking some of these social rules, to start ‘unplugging’ you from the matrix ;-) :

  • Sing along to songs loudly and out of tune.
  • On that point go to Karaoke and open set’s right after you get of stage!
  • Speak loudly in quiet bars.
  • Start a dance-floor limbo if you are in a nightclub.

Summing up.

So this brings me to the end of a mammoth post but to recap:

  • Understand the reason behind the social norm.
  • Understand that it is OK to break it every now and then.
  • Be able to recognize the right and wrong way to do it, we are going for an ‘Ahhhhh’ not an ‘Ewww’ factor (wow that was cheesy!)

Leave a comment and let me know what you think and if you have any questions please feel free to email me!

See you next time!

Karl

Tags: , , , Categories: Attraction, General, Inner Game

A strategy for nightgame part 1: Clubs

By Karl on January 27, 2011 Comments: 5

Hey guys,

For this post I want to go through with you a strategy for effectively gaming at night. This will not be heavy on technique but will help explain how to correctly navigate your way through the often confusing world of night game. This is the first of three posts in which I will cover the three locations of night game: clubs, bars and the street, and by the end of them you should have enough knowledge of the social situations that you can effectively game in them, for practice or for a goal.

The basics of Club game:

The Environment:

The most obvious point to start is the environment in a club. It has loud music, a lot of girls who have bitch shields up, a lot of drink, and not nearly enough space! While this may sound like hell to someone practicing game it is in reality the best place to practice! The atmosphere is intimidating because it is designed to be, especially to guys. The club makes it’s money on the bar, so the more uncomfortable someone is, the more likely they are to buy drinks. Once you recognise this, it is easier to deal with it, and use the environment to your advantage:

  • If it is cramped while standing it is a great excuse to open by asking someone to move up so you can sit down, or get to the bar. It is also great as a method of isolation: ‘it is too cramped/hot/loud, lets go to the smoking area for some air/more space/some quiet’.
  • As it is loud it is perfect to get close to hear and to kino!
  • If other guys are clearly uncomfortable, by being (or acting) calm and as if you are having fun you put yourself in a positive light and differentiate yourself from the rest!
  • If you can get past a girls bitch shield you not only get a huge amount of respect and feel great but it becomes easier to open her group up, and other groups around! Bitch shields are also a great source of self amusement, they allow you to be a bit inventive in getting round them and it is a good feeling to know you have broken one, and the easiest way is by giving her a positive response to her, complimenting her on her shortness etc. I will not go into a lot of detail as I know there are other posts here which are specific to dealing with disarming bitch shields and handling tests.

The Girls:


So now we know the environment we are dealing with, lets look at what we are there for, the girls! In a club it isn’t likely that people are there to talk about their jobs, childhood or hobbies! They are there for a bit of fun, a release from everyday life! Many guys learning get bogged down in trying to talk to women in a club and wonder why their success rate isn’t high! Remember to bear in mind why they are there, to have fun! Now bitch shields are prevalent in night clubs, but why is this?

When a girl goes out she knows she will be hit on, and she will enjoy some of the attention but being honest, she is most likely out for a night with her friends, and after the third or fourth guy comes up to her she will start to put the shield up. Bear this in mind when approaching her, and so don’t be surprised if you don’t get her falling into your arms as soon as you say hi! Now I am not saying to expect, and indeed dread a bitch shield, just be prepared for one, there are other blog posts which deal with this so I will not devote any time to it, other than saying the best way to handle them is positively.

So what is the best way to minimise the chance (or potency) of a bitch shield, or even just how to increase the chance of a successful opener? Remember what they are there for, to have fun! If you open with an opinion opener about if you should dye your hair then that is certainly better than nothing but why not make it a bit more calibrated. They are there to have fun, have a party, escape from their usual world for a little bit. If you open in a way which communicates you are not in that state of mind then the opener is likely to fall flat, likewise if you open with something which doesn’t add to this and increase their enjoyment of the night.

You don’t have to be super high energy, just enjoying yourself (or at least appear to be). Nice, low pressure situational openers are ideal for early on in the night, and you can have short interactions before going back and opening them later on again for longer periods of time. Another way of opening is by forcing an IOI (Indicator of Interest) with a girl before opening, this way you have a good idea of whether she will be warm or not, and if she gives a good response then approach, if she doesn’t nothing has been lost, and you can move on safe in that knowledge.

As for comfort building and escalating remember that you don’t want to be shouting in her ear all night to ask about her pet dog! Instead dance with a few push pull moves (which have been covered in another post) and if you want to speak to her for long periods of time isolate her to a quieter part of the club or outside to the smoking area/outside the club. This is true for escalating with K-closes. However tempting it is try not to K close her in front of her friends, as this can hinder your chances of a same night lay and could damage the rest of the interaction, as she does not want to be seen as ‘easy’ so show a bit of understanding and isolate her first.

The Timing:

Time passes differently in a nightclub compared to the outside world. There are really only three ‘phases’ in a club which everyone experiences relative to their time in the club.

1. Establishment: This is the first phase when everyone has just arrived and they are still settling into the night. At this point extraction is possible but unlikely if they have paid a big entry fee (e.g. in London something around £10-20, for university students £5-8, in the USA I am unaware!). If they have been looking forward and have planned to be in this club at this day then it is also very hard to extract at this point, but if neither of these two points are applicable then it is perfectly possible to extract a set to another venue. People tend to be a bit more guarded at this point in the night,as they have not yet loosened up but it is a brilliant time to do some social proofing (asking short questions and having very short interactions with almost everyone).

2. Socialising: At this point people have had a bit more to drink, have caught up with each other and feel more comfortable and are willing to start socialising! You will notice more IOI’s are given off at this stage, however it is nearly impossible to extract at this point as people have just settled in and are enjoying themselves. Now is the time to follow up on the social proofing from earlier and also to engage for longer periods of time.

3. Closing: This phase occurs in the last hour or two of the club being open. Opening new sets is a little bit more difficult as it is likely they have had a few too many guys ‘try it on’ already, but extraction with the ones you have already interacted with becomes a real possibility, and even more likely if you have been seeding the idea and building enthusiasm about it for a little while beforehand. This is a time to be in one set only with the end point in mind.

The Strategy:

So hopefully with all of this information you will be able to start to increase your understanding and enjoyment of club game. Below I have outlined a step by step strategy for you to start gaming in a club effectively:

1. Establish a base, familiarise yourself with the club by social proofing, asking questions such as ‘where are the bathrooms, other bars etc’

2. Go back in and re-open some warm sets from the social proofing stage.

3. Spend some time on a dancefloor, ideally either with a set or opening new ones.

4. Go back in and re-open the warmest sets from earlier, spending a longer and longer period of time.

5. Prepare for extraction/closing by seeding the ideas.

6. Work to extract/close.

Go out there and try to implement this basic plan and utilise the advice given. If you have a question about club game which you would like answered leave a comment or send an email!

Next in this series of posts…bar game, have fun guys!

Karl

Tags: , , , , , Categories: Approaching & Opening, Attraction, Club Game, Dance Floor Game, General, Inner Game, Seduction Tips