10 Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Don’t Work And Will Never Work

They are doomed from the beginning...

They are doomed from the beginning…

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There are multiple reasons why you may get into a long term relationship. You could both be in school and you’re heading off to different colleges, you have been offered a new job over the other side of the world that you want to take, you fell in love online and live in different cities where you both have established lives and jobs.

Whatever the reason, long distance relationships happen.

But here’s the thing. Women have wandering eyes just like men do and guess what? They also lie too, just like men do. So what makes you think that a woman will still be into you now that she’s thousands or hundreds of miles away from you?

Let me get something straight, before we get into this…

Long distance relationships don’t work and never will work (regardless of the crap you might read).

There I said it.

Regardless of how you feel about her and how she feels about you. When there is distance between you, something is going to happen… in most cases it’s a breakup.

Sorry to be the guy that delivers you the bad news (I.e the truth) but it needs to be said. There is far too much time wasted on long distance relationships which could have been saved with pragmatic thinking.

Here are the reasons why a long distance relationship just won’t work:

1. Minds wander

The mind is a complex thing. One day you are happy and positive, the next day you are sad and angry. Everyone deals with problems in their own way, but when you’re not in the same room as your partner, your mind and theirs will begin to wander.

Is this relationship working? Can I see myself with her in 10 years? Do I want to marry this woman? Do I want her to be the mother of my children? These questions will be raised in times of doubt, but will take over your mind as well as hers.

2. You are lacking physical attention

A strong and loving relationship depends on many things. One of the most important (if not THE most important) is physical attention. Kissing, hugging, sex… it all adds to the overall package of being with someone. Humans are incredibly tactile, we need to be touched. If you’re not touching her, someone else will.

3. Jealousy will happen

It’s very easy to get jealous over your girl, when you see social media comments and photos of nights out or her around other guys. Once you have a seed of doubt, it will take control of your thoughts and before you know it, all you’re thinking about is how she may be hooking up with some other guy.

Not only that, but jealousy will lead to insecurities and help to push you or her away, depending on who is the dominantly jealous one.

4. Technology isn’t enough

Calling, texting, FaceTiming, private messaging… it’s all well and good, but there’s nothing like being in front of a person, being able to look them in the eye and touch them. So regardless of how much you stay in contact, it will still put a natural strain on your relationship which is born out of frustration.

You can kid yourself into thinking it will be ok, but it won’t be and you’ll see this first hand within a couple of months apart.

5. It’s financially draining

If you’re a few hundred miles apart, then it might not be so bad. But what if you’re thousands of miles away from each other and you have no choice but to get on a plane to see each other? Well, that’s going to cost you a nice chunk of cash over time, which can be better spent on other things.

Also, what if you earn more money than her and she can’t afford to travel to you? Then it’s more of a one sided relationship right? It’s tough and will get to you.

6. It wastes time

Not only does spending money on traveling to each other become an issue over time, but TIME itself becomes a whole other issue. Let’s say you decide to see each other a couple of times a month because you only live 400 miles apart. That still means packing bags, hours of traveling there, unpacking bags and then traveling back again. Do you really want to do this twice a month? Also with a full time job, it would be exhausting.

7. Someone will cheat

With travel, money, jealousy and no physical contact. You will begin to see signs of doubt. This will eventually cause one of you to cheat. Not because you or her are bad people, but because you’re simply trying to fill the void that’s been created by you being in a long distance relationship.

You will feel lonely, you will want to have sex and you will want to feel that emotional connection with someone. So be prepared for that day.

8. Boredom will set in

Relationships in general can become quite boring, so imagine being in a long term relationship when you’re not having sex, you can’t hug your partner, you can’t ask them a simple question without texting or FaceTiming. It will become boring, because there isn’t any stimulation. It’s almost a robotic relationship.

boredom as you know will lead to tension. Bad times for your relationship.

9. Communication issues will happen

Even in today’s world with all the possible ways to communicate. You still need to find time to do it, plus it’s just not that easy to get something across over text or on the phone. This will lead to communication issues from both sides. She will get frustrated with you because you’re not doing something right, you will get frustrated with her, because she isn’t doing what you want and it just ends in an argument.

10. Trust will weaken

Trust can only go so far. The more time you spend apart, the more your trust will weaken for her. If she’s a pretty outgoing girl, it’s only a matter of time before she is presented with a new opportunity (another man). If you’re thousands of miles away from her, why wouldn’t she satisfy her cravings, I mean you wouldn’t know would you?

Conclusion

I’m not trying to scare people away from getting into long term relationships. I just think that more of them fail than actually make it, so be careful before committing your time and money. Oh yeah and your feelings too!

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Comments

  1. This is hilarious. Are people really this cynical and insecure in their relationships? Long distance isn’t hard for us, at all. Maybe our openness and honesty from when we met each other made our relationship so strong, healthy, and happy. Communicating, always, and just genuinely never ran into a problem or issue or even significant disagreement. I’m glad I found a guy who isn’t like you, or probably most of your readers. It’s funny to think about how deeply affectionate, soft, kind, and gentle he is. Who has never determined his self-value on women or sex, and has always improved himself for his own sake. A truly loving, cute, silly, and affectionate lover but also partner. It’s a bit shocking to see so many people evaluate self-worth on how many girls they slept with or who has the most beautiful sex toy. I hope all of you, one day, will fall for someone for who they are as a person first, and their looks second. I promise you, you really can fall in love based on personality alone, talking to someone for hours every day without even knowing their face. Physical attraction naturally follows, especially when neither of you had a type or were even looking for a relationship ever. It just happens. And the sex is special, when neither of you slept around. It’s a cherished thing, both not being virgins from high school fooling around, but it’s a vulnerable and intimate thing all the same. If even one of you finds this deep, selfless, truly happy love, I’ll be glad. We got plans together, my guy and I. For the rest of our lives.

  2. Silentskull says:

    This is exactly what is happening to me right now… sigh… she left 4 3yrs i could not go 2 her cuz i could not travel… i beg 4 communication, she didn’t communicate.. i met someone and fell 4 this person but still did not let go and now its a mess.. confused rn!

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