Just Got Rejected? Stop… Think Of The 7 Out Of 10 Rule… Then Keep Approaching

I recently received an interesting observational email from a reader that was so good, I had to post it here. He’s from the states, so makes a baseball reference which makes perfect sense and should keep you from feeling down after getting rejected… which will most likely happen very soon if you’re actively approaching every day.

Read it, then re-read it and read it again at least once per week. Why? Because I want the information to sink in and have an impact on your subconscious mind. When it does, you should see a major change in the way you approach women… you should start to care a lot less.

Anyway, let’s get on with the email:

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Readers email

Hey Gambler,

I read your blog and have been using Stealth Attraction for a couple of years now (with amazing results by the way). I’ve been gaming for around 3 years and have approached I’d say around 1500 girls at least in that time period, so have a pretty good perspective on approaching, rejection, approach anxiety, success rates etc.

The reason for the email is just to give some observational advice on approaching really. I see your posts which are great, but I think sometimes the hard facts from another guy who’s approaching every day would be an interesting take on the topic.

I have friends who are just starting out in game and have experienced it myself back in the early days. You approach a girl and for whatever reason, she just flat out rejects you. Either by walking away and not saying a thing or just saying no to your face.

Here’s my take on this and I’m going to use Baseball as an analogy here. To make it into the hall of fame and make a freakin fortune as a Baseball player, you need to strike out at least 7 out of 10 times. Meaning, you are FAILING 7 times (not hitting the damn ball) out of a total of 10 throws.

The 3 times you hit the ball, it doesn’t even need to be a homer. Just a hit is fine. Which to me, totally puts things into perspective when approaching girls.

If I approach just 10 girls in a week, I will fail at least 7 times and be successful at least 3 times… on average that is. Those 3 successes, could be an instant date, solid phone number or even a “bounce back” if I’m close to my place. Either way, by focusing on the “7 out of 10 rule” I’m removing the thought of failure and rejection, but replacing it with a mindset of “I’m going to be winning at least 3 times this week… guaranteed”.

When I realised this and told my friends about it, my whole mindset just shifted and things started to really pick up for me. To be honest, I think failure rate is even lower than 7 because my game is so tight these days.

Well that’s my analysis on the whole approaching thing anyway, hope you can share this with somebody.

Later bud.


Key points to take away

It’s an average (not an absolute)

Now the 7 out of 10 figure is an average and will be taken over a long period of time. It’s not an absolute figure and shouldn’t be taken as such. Some days you will have a 90% success rate and others a 10% success rate. That’s just the way life is dude.

Unlike baseball, “game” has multiple factors involved

How good you are at game depends on a multitude of factors. Your looks, voice tonality, physique, body language, mindset, social proof… etc. You might find you have a much better average than 7. I’d strongly recommend that you approach 10 girls a week for 30 days, then take a average from that number to give you a unique figure. Do this once every 6 months and see how you have improved your average over time.

No matter what level you are.. you will always get rejected

Approach anxiety stems from the feeling of being rejected. We don’t like or embrace rejection as a race and shy away from it, which is why some guys suffer from chronic approach anxiety. But here’s something that may add some level of comfort to your thoughts on approaching. You will ALWAYS get rejected. There will always be that one girl that rejects you (more than one usually) so forget the rejection part, it’s going to happen, just accept it and move forward.

Know when to quit

Wait what?! You’re telling me to quit! Actually yes I am. Quitting at the right moment will save you time and allow you to get into a pattern that will support your success in the future. Sounds a bit woo woo, but trust me it’s better to quit at say 10 rejections, learn from your mistakes and then approach again tomorrow, than it is to just keep ploughing like an idiot without evaluating your mistakes.

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