When Does No REALLY Mean No?

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Let me ask you a question…

When was the last time a girl said no to you when you tried to have sex with her? Last week? Last month? Maybe even last year?

Chances are you’ve had multiple women say no to you in your life in the bedroom.

So what does that mean?

Well believe it or not, you could have actually gotten laid. What I’m about to talk about today is a very controversial topic. Not only in the pickup community but “outsiders” like to have their say on it.. Especially the old feminists and goodie goodie folk.

You’ll see this question coming up again and again on forums…

“When does no really mean no?”

This question refers to when you’re with a girl on your bed maybe and you think that everything is going well. So you make a move, to kiss her or you’ve been kissing and you try to take her top off, basically initiating sex.

Then before you can even remove her bra she says… “wait, I don’t think this is a good idea” or “stop.. I shouldn’t be here”.

Frustrating right? This is known as LMR or last minute resistance, but to the rest of the world, it’s just known as blue balls!

Now here’s the thing.

In the past, I’ve had girls say to me on several occasions “I shouldn’t be doing this” or “we just met, I’m not having sex with you”. But yet, they’ve still ended up sleeping with me.

So what happened?

Well I read her body language, I listened to what she was saying to me and I took full responsibility so that she didn’t feel any guilt (which a lot of women do, because they don’t want to be perceived as whores by other women and men).

Let me put this into perceptive:

You’re with a girl that you met on a night out… you’ve been kissing her, touching each other, flirting outrageously and you can feel the sexual chemistry.

You invited her back to yours, after a few drinks you stumble up to your bedroom and fumble around on the bed for a minute or two. Half way through you taking her bra off, she says…

“This isn’t right, I shouldn’t be doing this” or “Do you think I’m a slut or something, I don’t sleep with guys right after just meeting them”.

What do you do?

1. Read her body language

Body language is a big one, if she’s rubbing your cock with her leg, whilst you’re kissing her and she’s putting her hand up your shirt and stroking your back. Then she’s obviously digging the whole thing and it’s totally fine to keep escalating. If on the other hand she’s just laying there, looking awkward, while you undress her… then take a step back and see whether she’s actually nervous or just not into you at all.

Does it also feel like she’s pushing you a way slightly instead of pulling you in? If so then take that as another sign she doesn’t want you go any further.

2. Listen to what she says

Women say things because they don’t want you other anyone to think they are sluts, which is fine. But it’s like a knee jerk reaction to you trying to get in her panties. If she says “I shouldn’t be doing this, it’s too soon”. This doesn’t mean stop, it just means you haven’t built enough sexual tension up yet.

However if she says something like “Please stop, I don’t want to have sex with you”. Dude, get off her! Women speak in code most of the time, they say one thing and mean another. But, if they are saying they don’t want to have sex with you, then stop whatever you’re doing and end the night there.

3. Agree with her, take responsibility

Women don’t want to feel guilty for sleeping with a guy on the first night or for whatever other reasons they have in there head, so it’s up to you to reassure her. You can say things like “I don’t usually do things like this either, but you’re so sexy I can’t help it”.

The bottom line is this, don’t rush or force her EVER… keep the rapport flowing and always use kino, whilst escalating throughout the night. If you do these things and she agrees to go back to yours, then you’re 99% of the way there dude.

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