Friends With Benefits Advice: How To Get A F**k Buddy… Or A Bunch Of Them If You Want

It’s far easier to find a f**k buddy than think

Friends with benefits are a must for any single guy.

You can call or text them whenever you like, get them over to your place for sex and kick them out the door without any feelings lost.

Why? Because you’re both in an agreement which means you can use each other for sex whenever you both see fit.

This means that you won’t hurt each others feelings (usually) and you get all the benefits of getting laid.

In this article you’re going to learn some killer friends with benefits advice that will allow you turn any girl into a “F**k buddy” and keep them like that until you want to either take things further or stop seeing them without losing them as a friend.

Not only am I going to tell you how, I’m also going to give you the whys and the rules, which detail what you should and shouldn’t ever do.

So get ready for the most in-depth friends with benefits guide you’ve ever read!

NOTE: Did you know that women are more likely to stay your bang buddy if you know how to treat them in the bedroom? Yep, so you need to get better between the sheets. Watch this video right now.

How to turn a girl into a F**K buddy

Here are some friends with benefits tips and specific steps, take note dude:

  1. Create a connection with her – Nothing can begin without you building some level of rapport and a connection with her. If it’s just a one night stand you’re after, then you don’t need much of a connection. A friend with benefits, is a little more complex, so you have to be willing to put the time in.
  2. Find out her situation – Ask her if she’s seeing anyone or is looking for a relationship. If she’s looking for a relationship, then it’s probably not a good idea to use this girl for sex, as she will get emotionally attached. If she’s single and says “I’m not looking for anything right now” then she’s perfect for this type of friendship.
  3. Tell her what you want and give her a choice – Let her know that you like her sexually, but you don’t want anything serious. Say to her “Listen, why don’t we call each other when we want sex and just have some fun” Leave it at that and see what she says.

Try not to come across as a desperate guy who just wants to use her for sex, this will not look good for you and she’ll be turned off.

Friends with benefits rules you must stick to

  • Never act desperate – If you text or call and she doesn’t want to come over for sex. Just leave it at that, don’t beg her or act like a desperate idiot.
  • Keep it between you and her – There’s no need to tell the world that you’re both having sex with each other. So keep it hush hush.
  • Keep it very casual – If you use her for sex too much, it will become boring and the fun will fizzle out. So once a week or every two weeks is good.
  • Be brutally honest – If she asks whether you’re seeing other girls, be honest and say yes. You have nothing to hide, you’re not in a relationship and it’s not exclusive.
  • Choose wisely – If she becomes a good friend, don’t have sex with her because this can ruin a great friendship.
  • If you fall for her, STOP – Feelings can cause jealousy and a whole host of other problems, so if you fall for her tell her and end it… unless she likes you too and you can move things forward.
  • Be safe – Obviously where contraception dude, don’t be an idiot. Especially if you’re seeing multiple girls.
  • Be nice to her – Friends don’t treat each other like dirt, so you need to treat her with respect. Otherwise she will feel used and dirty.
  • Set rules with her – It’s a good thing to set a few ground rules so you both know where the boundaries are.
  • It will end at some point – Everything ends and changes, your f**k buddy will too. When this happens, don’t let it bother you just move on and find someone else.
  • Don’t be protective – If you see her out with another guy, never get jealous or protective. She’s not your girlfriend so she can do what she likes with other guys. Same goes for if she sees you with another girl.
  • Keep it simple – This means no dates, holidays together or anything that could cause you to have feelings.
  • Tell her if you start a relationship – You need to let her know if you get into a proper relationship with another girl. Don’t keep having sex with her, otherwise you’re cheating.

BEWARE: You and her might get hurt

Yes we all like a bit of nookie, but we’re only human so there are going to be feelings on both sides at some point.

When this happens it’s pretty much game over and you should end the sex at that very moment, otherwise someone will get hurt.

Common questions

Can you turn an ex-girlfriend into a friend with benefits?

You can, but this would be very tricky and your emotions would get involved which is just not a good idea. So it’s best to stay away from trying to make her your f**K buddy.

What should I do if she starts getting feelings for me?

You need to tell her that you’re not looking for anything serious at the moment and if she can’t continue having fun, then she needs to stop seeing you sexually. It’s more than likely she’ll stop seeing you though, because the feelings will only grow.

What are the boundaries?

Keep it fun and simple, no deep feelings or treating her like dirt. respect that she’s in this for the same reason you are.

So that’s it dude. Straightforward friends with benefits advice that will easily allow you to get a girl (or even a bunch of girls) as your f**K buddy.

Don’t forget, if you want to keep your f**k buddy, then you should learn how to give her orgasms. Watch this video and you will.

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  1. What if I admitted to my crush but I got rejected. Now she’s my best friend. She’s the type to be a good girl and consider sex a very nasty thing unless done with a passionate lover. We’re still in highschool and we have a very close and friendly relationship. How do I approach her to become friends with benefits? Because she might think of me as a disgusting pervert asshole as it’s not very normal to have sex in our culture. But I really do want a friends with benefits relationship with her. Her body is damnnnn!!

  2. Please need advice

    Hi I’m Kimi I’ve been seeing a fuckbudy on and off for the past 4 years. We have unprotected sex. We were going so good he asked to stay the night a couple time but never stayed. So he asked me to have a 2some me and another guy so we did he just got up had a shower and walked out he messaged me and asks if the guy left I Said yes to him and I asked him to come back he said no because he was sad I asked him to come back so we cold talk he said it not you it me I don’t want a fuck busy any more he need to stop handing sex with me so I left it at that I also started having feelings for him I tried to cut him off didn’t see him for months then he’ll just show up at my house. I sent him a msg off how I felt about the 3 some and he never replied. Did I do something wrong? I didn’t realise that I want more with him until that night

  3. Rephrased my original comment

    I met her at college, she had a boyfriend back then, but they are no longer together, for some reason while at college she started asking all the guys in the class, “if you could have sex with one of the girls in the class, who would it be?” I said it was her, even though I was a bit shy cause i had to say it in front of her bf, she seemed completely fine with it

    Oh and she started the relationship with her College bf the day after she met him, I met her last year same time, haven’t spoken much to her since college, so….yeah you know the rest

  4. I met her at college, she had a boyfriend back then, but they are no longer together, for some reason while at college she started asking all the guys in the class, “if you could have sex with one of the girls in the class, who would it be?” I said it was her, even though I was a bit shy cause i had to say it in front of her bf, she seemed completely fine with it

    Now, the year after, I wanna ask her

  5. Should I become FWB with my best girl friend and if so how should I talk to her about it?

  6. Oahu Girl says

    He and she are friends with benefits for over a year. He like another girl even she and the another girl are great friends. She likes him, he like the another girl and the another girl like him as friend. What if he ask the another girl for a date or have sex, it will effect she feel tension. Is it good idea for he and the another girl date and have sex in circle of friends? Or suggest for him meet girls outside of circle of friends? So she and the another girl remain great friends without tensions. Please help. Thanks :)

  7. What would be the best way to bring this up to a guy friend? There is definitely an attraction between us and it just seems this would be so much better than a relationship for so many reasons.

  8. Hey Im in sort of a situation, me and my Gf just got together and i really want to get in bed with her but i think shes a virgin. Do you think its a good idea to be her first?

  9. I hooked up with my friend recently and I havent talked to him since but i really want to have like a fwb thing with him could i just text him out of the blue and ask if it was a one time thing or if he would want to do it more often or would that be weird?

    • PUA Training says

      Warm him up first, maybe go for a drink and then ask him after a couple of hours. Don’t even ask, just say… “listen, I’m single, your single… we don’t anything serious, so let’s just have a bit of fun together”. If he doesn’t go for it, no biggie just keep him as a friend.

  10. Hey man awesome article…

    So I’m in college and met a girl at the club last week and we ended up hooking up and she stayed over (she just got broken up with). The next day we went out again and she ended up staying over but no sex. I ended up sleeping with her after meeting her in a bar the other day but she’s been texting me everyday a bunchh. I’m looking for the FWB deal but havnt told her I’m not looking for a relationship yet…
    Should I still tell her? Or let it play out?
    If so how should I go about telling her?

  11. Well this friend of mine, we have been friends for months, and we have talked about being friends with benefits, and he thought on it and had decided he couldn’t handle it. well more often than not, we text at night, talking junk to each other (naughty talk) and he happened to mention the friends with benefits thing again, and said its something to think on and said he would think on it. i cant force him to do this, and he is acting like he wants to, as much junk talkin we do through text, it seems ligit, is it worth it?

  12. Cathy Long says

    I have a question. Started having sex with this guy 2 weeks ago, I recently became single and he’s been wanting it to happen for 10 years. We are super attracted to one another but when we get to the sex part, we can’t seem to “keep it going” if you know what I mean. What gives?? I want to keep him as a fuck buddy but….

    I have had a world win of experiences of women literally throwing themselves at me. But it always falls apart. To date i have been offered a threesome (I acted the wrong way and messed it up bad), been with a girl that REALLY wanted it ( always talked about it, we bought her a vibrator), and screwed up at least three other chances where girls told me that they wanted me in them. And countless more time where i messed it up.

    What happens is girls get interested in me and then I hesitate, I see my chance and then I see my chance blow up in my face, and then its all down hill from there. Im in college now, but back in high school all the girls used to talk about me, they’d say ” He’s good looking and fun but, weird”. When I heard them say I was weird, I just assumed it was because I wasn’t hooking up and go for all the opportunities I had. I even lost friends because I appeared to be fun and cool to hangout with, I can command a room and I’m confident, except when girls start liking me because I just HATE messing things up all he time. And of course I do mess things up. It makes me sick.

    The good part, I’m always hit on, and I’ve been pulled aside by girls and told that I the most interesting guy around. I just know that this will keep happening and because I just have something about me that attracts women. I NEED to figure out what to do to stop f’ing my own chances.

    What am I doing wrong?

    Please any advice from anyone would be more than appreciated.

  14. I am in a station. Both me and my friend just broke up with our partners my ex boyfriend is my guy friend friend. Anyways he broke up with his gf and then my relationship ended like 2weeeks later. He is 40 and am 22 he is very attacking, I had asked him before what was the younger he will be with he said 30. I want to have him as a FTB but I don’t how to ask him. We work together and txt pretty often , we both don’t want a relationship just want to have fun. Idk how to approach it since we don’t hangout alone. Were good friends not close close but we are there for one another. I don’t want it to be wired if he says no since we do sit together during breaks and lunch

  15. Hey great article^^ I do have a question, though. There is this girl who I sort of had a FWB with last year, but feelings for involved and it ended as I wanted more. Naturally, we didn’t talk for a couple of months and both of us just dated other people. Anyway, around the summer we started talking again and she occasionally still texts me random stuff. Now more recently she found out I was seeing someone (nothing serious) and she kept asking me about it, but I just told her that it wasn’t anything serious and how I’m not looking for anything. She mentioned how she was casually dating, but not looking for anything either. Since that day her and I have actually gotten along much better and she’s invited me out to social gatherings too. She even texts me a little more frequently now so I know she’s definitely interested, but I just have a question. How do I go about inviting her back to my place? I just don’t want to come off as desperate or anything. Should I maybe hang out with her alone a couple of times first?

  16. Hi I like your advice so I have a question-

    Im a girl and i have this friend that i want to be f**k buddies with and he wants the same ( he’s mentioned it before but i was kinda shy about it) and its been a while sence Ive brought it up and I want him as a F**k buddy so how do I bring up that i wanna be friends with benifits?

  17. I would place emphasis on the “friends” aspect, as in plurality. In order to mitigate any emotional attachments, both men and women who play the game should seek multiple partners. The more time you spend with one person, the likelier you’ll be attached to that individual. It’s much easier to cut ties and avoid attachments by maintaining what I call a “rotation.” I personally believe the rotation should consist of 3-5 people (if you reside in one city). No less than 3 and no more than 5. If you only have two people, you’ll fall for one if not both. Having 4-5 people makes each “friend” avoidable and not committed. You can have sex with one person and call them next week and move on to the next person the following day. This prevents too much “exposure” whilst maintaining a healthy sex flow. No one can possibly be committed or attached to someone who calls or texts them once or twice a week. On a penultimate note, know when to cut it off. Don’t play with people’s emotions and let the person know your stance before having sex, albeit be direct with letting them know your position or it will kill the mood (especially if you’re a man). Finally, get tested for STDs on a regular basis, use condoms, birth control or suggest politely if you’re a man that your “friend” uses birth control and lastly insist on knowing your friend’s STD status without being offensive. Happy hunting ladies and gentlemen!

  18. Nice article :D
    I’m approaching a FWB “relationship” with one of my college mates atm. I’ve known him since october and we got along from the start but we didn’t really get to talk until like two weeks ago, when we met at a house party and decided to go to his place to talk and have a couple of drinks. It ended in a heavy making-out session but we didn’t have sex that night.
    Yesterday he texted me whether I’d be interested in sleeping with him for real and I said yes. Sounds like a FWB situation to me.
    I wouldn’t mind becoming his f**k buddy since he’s fairly attractive, we get along great and I don’t believe I have any feelings for him other than physical desire.
    But still, there’s also the “what if’s” to think about. What if one of us DOES fall in love with the other as it frequently seems to happen with FWB relationships? What if I fall for someone else, how do I end it then?
    And how do I set the boundaries/ rules?

  19. Hey Guys I need advice right now. Im married for 10 years and my wife is great understanding , but she has fought with me since our marriage . but for last 10 months I have been seeing a girl , who knows Im married and have 2 kids . we have had great time , movies, sex in woods , fantasies etc . but recently she was invited to a couples home , and she had few times and when they broke up , she was invited but the guy who used her educational expertise asked her for massage , she told me he asked and I achanged subjects , but later she hides things from me and goes on to massage him and she comes home late and got kicked out of her house , but after that she went on to sleep over with the guy even though she was with me as it abovious in her text message with close friend which I accidently read , and ignored initally but told her .
    but but then she told I married she cannot do anymore . we can be great friends “same old reason ”
    and she still spends lots of time with me hanging out . even she spoke about how she ended up sleeping and told me she still likes me and we can be great friends . How to get her back .
    1. She is looking for job badly
    2. she doesnt have house now , stays with her friend
    3. she will come anytime I call her
    4. but wont have sex
    5. just to make her on same spot , i created a imaginary friend who calls and texts me to hangout
    6. LOL nothing is working
    HELP me guys and girls

    Note : – we started as fuck buddy , then bars , movies, long drives , threesomes (just watching and she came 10 times )etc

    What should be my next move ?
    she is a person , if you dont want and if you tell her , will cut you off completely . I really miss her sexual company , but trust me I can talk to her anything and she is a great friend , except sex . but i do need it badly – BOTH

  20. Great article!! But my problem is as an attractive female I only seem to meet men who claim to want a casual relationship and as soon as we have sex they get protective and jealous! Like they are trying to force me into a relationship I explained from day one that I’m not looking for a serious committed relationship and they agree.. but then all the it would be nice to be with you full time starts which pushes me away so now I’m not getting n e BC I can’t meet 1 who juz wants to take it slow.. always a rush with the guys I meet.. I mean marriage and baby talk in only Knowing them for 1 month!!! Like seriously .. beauty is a curse..

  21. Great article! I need some advice, my friend dated this girl for a WEEK, he already said he dosent care if I dated her, but I never could do that to him but I would still f*** her she already sends me sexual pictures and we talk about having sex, I told her straight up I could never date her, Im thinking about turning her into a fuck buddy (yes) or (no)

  22. I have no idea what to do with this girl. A while ago we used to be really close, we’d make out and stuff but that was it, which was total BS. Anyways, right now she started texting me and said she still has feelings out of nowhere. This girl, wants you to be friends with her for a long time, and then will have sex with you. She wants to stick with one guy and just use him for sex and that’s that.I just figured out and this is exactly what I’m looking for, but the problem is how can I speed that up? She had been friends with her other partners for almost 2 years, and I have only know her for 4 months. Is there any advice on what to say to speed the process up? Thanks a lot.

  23. Big Pimpin says

    I’m kinda confused,like I have girls who are friends I’ve never had sex with.Some who are girls I’ve had sex with before and then just wouldn’t really follow up with them but I suppose you could say they’re friends but to me they’re kinda like something else.I know that sounds bad but these “friends with benefits” are they really your friends?I think I would just treat a girl differently if she was my friend,like and if I just started coming on to her it would be a bit weird.I guess what I’m tryna ask if how do you go about meeting these girls?Like would you really just ask your friend if they wanted to have sex?Do you just work at it like you would any girl?Is this a way of being in and out of the friend-zone at the same time?Sorry I’m kinda springing a loada shit on you!Thanks very much for the help,you save lives ;)

  24. Hey man! I’m in college right now and I need some advice on how to get this girl as a FWB. Mostly, everytime I see her she’s surrounded by guys but she always calls me over and gives me a hug. She just got out of a relationship and I have her number so what’s the next move?

  25. We just finished for our summer uni break and iv got a lot more time now, i have a friend that i hang out with every so often but there is nothing physical yet, im not looking for a relationship at the moment and im quite sure she isnt either, i want to turn her into a f**k buddy but not sound desperate, any advice on things to say or just how to initiate it?

  26. Im on a long summer break from uni and im looking to make one of my friends into a fuck buddy, but im not the girlfriend type of guy, and i still wanna be free at parties/clubs, any advice as we hang out but there is nothing physical yet? Also i dont know if she has feelings but my gut feeling says no

  27. Im 44 years old man and you still help me out alot. But one problem i have and a few women tell me is “im too nice of a guy”. I need to be more of a bad guy. not sure where to begin? Need help badly.

    • PUA Training says

      Be the “good” guy Donnie. The guy that has a mixture of nice and bad, so he’s funny, witty and charming, but can also be dominant, leading and a little rogue.

  28. Lols
    ..I’m a college dude in Jamaica, I look attractive enough and women Love my personality and my features (interesting hair etc.) , but I’ve always been cool around each 1 , to the point where I know quite a bit of them absolutely like me, and yes I can read their subconscious signals. But I’ve always had difficulty expressing what I want from them cause I hate sounding typical , not to menion desperate at times… Much appreciated for this article , but I have a predicament;

    There’s a girl in my college class Who I started to talk to about a month and some weeks ago, but I stopped like 3 weeks ago cause I didn’t think anything wud come out of it, but now with this article I want to test if we can just be FWB , even though she has a bf already (or so she says) , even worse , plenty of other guys want her peach too .

    I’m wondering hoW to Seem different, but at the same time Initiate the FWB plan , without sounding too much like I want to use her for sex. Can u help me to get there bro ? :)

  29. Hi,
    If tell my female friend something like this you mentioned : “Listen, why don’t we call each other when we want sex and just have some fun” I think she will think I’m a jerk and I will propably lose her friendship. I just can’t imagine that this will work with her…

  30. Great advice I got one and I’m only 14 :P thankyou
    I have a q though what if the girl gets pregnant?

  31. oh man. I feel like I have messed up on this one. I got out of a serious relationship about 5 months ago. I am 24 and it was my first relationship ever. It was a long distance relationship that didnt work. Well this girl who also lives in that same state which is two states away has been a friend for awhile now. she admitted to having a crush on me while I dated this girl. we have been talking on the phone for a few months now and now this coming thanksgiving i am going down to meet with her and her family. shit balls. I dont think I can handle another long distance relationship let alone have another relationship. I feel she wants one. and now in a week Im driving six hours away to stay with her family for a few days. a fuck buddy would be fine with me. is there any way out of this for me? or am I doomed? I would hate to be a douche bag and hurt her. damn…..

  32. !zHey so I have a question ? So a couple months a lady friend n I hung out together at club. At the end of the night were drunk (well I was buzzed she was drunk ) anyways we hop in her car she grabs my face n starts making out with me we going at it I’m in her pant for like four minutes until one of my homies knocked on the window. We went home never talked about again. Here’s the thing ever since that incident she has been coming over everyday. The crazy thing we always hung out but never like this she would come over once every three months now its everyday . She tells me about her sex life n all her fetishes. Now what I’m asking is she giving me hints that she wants to do the deed n if so how should I approach about it please help!

  33. Hey man! Awesome article! Really well written!
    But I have a bit of a problem, see I’m attracted to this girl, but she just happens to be a virgin. She is very open minded, I mean, whenever we hang out and joke around with our friends about sex and stuff, she always has something to say, whether its creepy, or interesting.
    So, I don’t know, would it be a smart thing to be this girls first, and first f**k buddy?

    • PUA Training says

      Depends what she wants. If she wants love and a relationship, then you could hurt her if you only want sex. It’s a special thing for a girl, so it’s unlikely that her first man would also be her first fuck buddy! Unlikely…but possible, so try and get a feeling for what she expects..

  34. I have a good friend of a few years who has very recently been out of a relationship. I always thought of her as attractive and now want a casual relationship. Should I wait a little bit or go for it?

  35. Man iv got a situation. Iv been friends with this girl for nearly 2 years then at a house party 3 weeks ago we hooked up. It was shit sex from me I was way to drunk we f**kd for 10mins then I just completely lost the wood haha we have a pretty tight circle of friends but we haven’t told any of them about what has happened because its what she wanted which was fine with me. We have talked about the night pretty openly. I want another shot to 1st prove I’m not a shit root and 2nd start a fwb relationship. But I have the feeling she thinks I want a real relationship because I have acted stupidly like giving her to much attention and putting x on the end of some msgs. Should I ask her now and tell her iv been acting lovey for no reason or should I give it a week or to, ignore her a bit then ask her.

  36. Very good advice, though i have a question aslo.. how could i get a co worker of 3 weeks to b my f**k buddy? im intresed in two diff women and im sure one of them is married but spouse works out of the state. and the other im not sure if she has a bf or what. im in a relationship myself (please dont judge) and i do love her but want to be with other women because im young and not ready to live the married life. but i dont want to “DATE” other women, and i dont want to loose her. Should i tell the coworkers i have gf? also i dont know them that well so how do i even bring up f**k biddy talk?

  37. well can ya help me with this one? my coworker is in high school and he recently became my sorta fool around buddy (NO SEX). im a college girl and this is my first fool around buddy i tell him since im a college girl, i want what i want when i want it. IN OTHER WORDS, this kid so far has had a habit of makin me wait forever for him to come over. sometime i have to wait till like after midnight for him to come over cause hes hanging with friends(i dunno many guys who hang hours with friends and then decide ‘hey i think i mite go get some action’ -_-) one night i just told him ‘jus text me even if its after midnight i’ll be up’ and he said ok. close to midnight i texted him, got nothing back. i think he totally bailed on me and i jus ended up goin to sleep. i dont wanna sound like a girlfriend cause I KNOW i’m not but i wanna tell him like dont make plans and then bail, thats not how fool around buddies work. i thought buddies were supposed to give each other what they wanted WHEN they wanted it, but he makes me wait for him to stop doin whatever; fixin his car, work, hang wit friends etc. but so far, he hasnt SAID anything, implied that he’s messing and this isnt what he wants to do. just his actions of makin me wait and then him not showing up last nite. dont like waiting for the physical stuff

  38. Hi there! Great article. I’m studying in Sweden and as you can imagine campus is heaven on earth.

    I would like to have several fuck buddies. Would you suggest gaming as much as I can at university, or just work one specific social circle and girl, get one and then move to the other, or anything else?

    Many thanks

  39. Loved this article! I’m just wondering how to set up an oPen relationship with a friend. As in, I want to actually date her and see her 1-2 times a week as well as date other girls at the same time? How would you suggest I set it up?

    • PUA Training says

      I’d suggest you keep her as a friend. If you get the whole FWB thing involved, then it will only end badly… women don’t think the same as men, as soon as you start having sex with her, she’ll begin thinking differently about you and will develop feelings. Unless she’s a cold hearted bitch (which would be perfect). If you don’t care about ruining the relationship then I’d get touchy feely with her every time you see her and keep pushing it a bit further. Then invite her to your place for drinks and go from there.

  40. Oh you Beauty says

    I’m after NSA sex with a girl from work. Couple of years ago, something was coming to fruition but never did. I want to revisit this. I don’t know if she is in a relationship, I know she split with her ex a few months ago. How can I escalate to arranging sex by text? Oh yeah, from previous experience she can be flakey, what can I do to make this stick. If it helps she’s known as being a ‘goer.’

    • PUA Training says

      Get some lunch with her, start being way more flirty with her in and out of the office. Then ask her if she wants to grab a quick drink after work on the Friday as you need to kill some time before seeing some friends. Then when she’s out escalate like crazy and make it happen that night.

  41. great advice here!

    what about FWB with my girl friends best friend?

  42. Very good advice!
    My question: What if i fall for her? and she’s okay escalating it to the next level, should i tell her who i really am? That I’m into PUA? And what if she finds out? Especially since I’m planning to make youtube videos and blogs about it..thanks man!

    • PUA Training says

      Who you really are? Are you Batman or something? Don’t ever say you’re “into PUA”…. it’s lame dude. If you fall for her, then that’s a good thing, it could turn into a really healthy relationship. If she she finds out your PUA antics, just pass over the topic like it’s nothing.

  43. Great advice but it seems difficult to get the guy I’m f’ing to be more available to f’ing. I’ve been “seeing” this guy for a little over a month and we’ve both confirmed that we’re not looking for anything serious, should be the perfect scenario for FWB right? I personally prefer sex more than once a week, 2-3 times is ideal, in all reality at this point 5 times a week would be great! He seems content with once a week, I’ve gone as far as texting him, asking if I should be looking for someone else to fill the “position”. Of course as soon as I ask that he’s immediately available. What do you think the deal is? Is there any great way to get him lined up on my calendar for more regular sex?

    • PUA Training says

      Hey Bree, I’d do 2 things… 1) spice things up in the bedroom, ask him what fantasies he’s always wanted to do in real life and then do them for him… he should be doing the same for you. Straight up sex is great, but can get a winsy bit boring after a while if you don’t try anything new. 2) Make him want you more by saying what you’ve already said, which is that you’re looking for other guys to fill the position… if he feels like he could lose a solid f**k buddy, then he’ll wake up to that.

  44. really great advice but i have a problem i used to like this guy and i wanted a relationship but he never wasnt clear with what he wanted. we were also hooking up so that just made it worst and i ended get hurt so we stopped talking for a while but now he is back and he wants to restart that again and i know this time that he just wants preety much be friends with benfits. So should i go with it or not ?

    • PUA Training says

      If you have REAL feelings for him, then obviously the answer would be NO! But if you can keep things physical “which we know you ladies can’t” then by all means restart things and have sex with him again.

      • I have to disagree with PUA Training who states “But if you can keep things physical “which we know you ladies can’t” then by all means restart things and have sex with him again.”

        I have had an on again-off again relationship for over 5 years with a man that, for me, has been purely sexual in nature. We did start out in a boyfriend/girlfriend role which lasted about a year, but it didn’t work for me, yet I wanted to continue the physical and hang out sometimes. I haven’t dated anyone else during this time, I just didn’t want any type of commitment to him other than as friends and F*#k buds – he has a long history of alcoholism/drug abuse and I saw him tailspin over and over again which is the reason I won’t engage in a romantic relationship. But the physical attraction between us has always been smoking and I can’t fight it when too much time has gone by. It is the first and only experience like this I’ve had in my life and I truly feel like “the guy” in the relationship because he’s the one who sighs and gets upset about not having me as his girlfriend (even though I’ve made it clear over and over that we are FWBs only). Guess I should back off but he’s the one who contacts me and if its been awhile, I can’t resist, yet then we end up back in the same place, with him trying to make a relationship out of something that is sexual for me only.

  45. Thanks for that.
    Question : When exactly is it best to tell her what I want ?

    • PUA Training says

      When you start getting a little frisky with her. So just before you hook up, she may not like it but it’s a good way to determine the potential “friends with benefits”.

  46. Really good advice, however, I’ve got a question. Is it possible to get some of my ex’s best friends to be my f buddies, even tho we dont talk much?

    • PUA Training says

      That might be a tricky one. If you don’t talk to them much, how do you think it’s going to happen? Unless you have some crazy Jedi skills, I suggest building a connection with them first. You will hurt your ex girlfriends feelings in the process, so if you’re happy to burn that friendship, then go for it. If you care for her then don’t. It all depends on how well you got on with her friends before, if you knew that they fancied you and that they would actually sleep with you behind their friends back. I’d just focus on new girls dude, it’s risky water.

  47. excellent advice, I have a dilemma maybe you can lend some wisdom. I have this one girl that has had me in a friend zone for a while until just few days ago we finally hooked up and now we are f buddies. Now the problem is i also have another girl that has been f buddy for a VERY long time and we go at it regularly, Should i let her know about the friend zone girl (whom i like)?

    • PUA Training says

      Only if she asks dude, if she doesn’t ask then what’s the point in telling her? If she finds out and gets the hump with you, say “Listen, this wasn’t anything exclusive, we both understood this was a no strings attached fun thing. I’m totally cool with you seeing other guys”. That should then put her in her place. Sounds like you’ve got a good thing going dude, keep it up!

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