How To Tell A Girl You Like Her (Without Sounding Pathetic)

So here you are, finding yourself spending more and more time with a girl and you’ve decided that you want to put yourself out there and tell her that you like her.

The only problem is that when you’ve done this in the past, it hasn’t worked out the way you’d like and you’re wondering if the problem is with you or with the way that you told the girl that you liked her.


Well, if the problem is that the girl simply didn’t like you in return, that’s a topic for another day.

The good news is that if the problem is in the way you told her you liked her, that’s something that you can definitely work on and improve.

Should You Tell Her?

While this might have worked for George Strait when he was back in the third grade with Emmylou Hayes, this is probably not something that you want to do.

This might sound confusing to some of you out there. After all, what’s wrong with simply coming right out and expressing your feelings?

Think about it - is that something that a man does… or is this something that a boy does?

You’re a man and that means that you’re not going to come right out and blurt something out that makes you seem weak or needy.

What you want to do is first begin with some simple little steps to even determine whether or not this girl is on the same page that you are.

Should You do it Over Text or in Person?

While you might think this should be obvious, for some guys, they think texting is the way to go. After all, they text all the time, so why shouldn’t they just text a girl that they like her?

For one thing, it’s really cowardly.

Quick Note

When a girl is told by a guy that he likes her, she wants him to be there, in front of her, professing his feelings.

The last thing she wants is to be seeing “I like you a lot” in a text message. Instead, she wants to be able to see his emotions in his eyes.

Another reason you’re going to do it in person is so you can see her eyes, too, and you can gauge her reaction to what you’ve just told her.

Signs That a Girl Likes You

There are actually more than 20 signs that women give off subconsciously, that lets you know if they like you or not. Here are some of the most important ones:

  • Little smiles directed at you
  • Making prolonged eye contact
  • Little touches and gestures
  • Asking questions about you and your interests
  • Texts sent throughout the day
  • Seems nervous around you

So, let’s say that you like a girl and you’ve noticed that whenever she sees you, she smiles and when she talks to you, she makes eye contact and sometimes touches your hand or just kind of “hug bumps” into you.

Quick Note

She’s asking questions about your life, about your interests and you’ve noticed that she seems to be texting you throughout the day.

Chances are pretty good that she likes you and that you might want to think about moving onto the next step.

Will it Ruin the Friendship?

This is one of those questions that’s really difficult to simply give a flat-out “yes” or “no.” After all, every friendship is different.

If the friendship is strong enough and it turns out the attraction might not be mutual, it should survive with a minimum amount of awkwardness.

On the other hand, if the friendship isn’t really that strong, it’s possible that it might end that particular relationship.

If it does, that might be a good sign that relationship probably wasn’t ever going to go anywhere, however.

Look at it this way - if she’s not liking you the same way and the friendship is strong enough, it’s going to survive.

On the other hand, if she likes you the way you like her, putting those feelings out there in the open might lead the two of you into a relationship level that you previously never thought was possible.

When am I Going to Know it’s the Right Time?

Well, if life were a movie, you’d know it’s the right time by the way there’s swelling music in the background as she looks into your eyes, leans towards you, her eyes focused on you, and her lips parted ever so slightly.

Then again, this is real life and if there’s swelling music in the background, you might have an orchestra following you around and it might not be the best time to tell someone you like them.

Quick Note

There’s no perfect time to announce your feelings, but it’s best to make sure the scene is properly prepared.

You’re not going to want to do it out of the blue, when the two of you are just walking down the street and she’s just told you that her dog has kidney failure.

But if the two of you have just had a great time together and the night is coming to an end, it might be okay for you to tell her how you’re feeling. When that time comes, simply look her in the eyes, hold her gaze, and tell her how you feel.

Make sure your feelings come across as confident and not needy. Let her know you like her but that she’s under no obligation to return those feelings.

Personality Matters

Let’s say that you like this girl but she’s usually surrounded by guys you think are far superior to you. However, when the two of you are together, you’ve discovered she’s not someone who needs all that attention and who actually has a depth to her that others might not realize.

Do you stand a chance?

Well, according to Scientific American, researchers conducting a study on perceptions of physical attractiveness, personality plays a much more important role in the way people perceive us than previously thought.

Students in a summer course rated each other based on physical attractiveness, liking, whether or not the students knew each other, and intelligence.

Then, after working together for six weeks, they were asked to rate each other again and it turned out that non-physical characteristics (especially liking) caused people to perceive physical attractiveness greater in the final perceptions as opposed to the initial perceptions.

This is great news. It means that even though you might not be the most handsome man in the room, the way you’re perceived can make you more attractive to others — and more likely to have the attention you want reciprocated.

What are Some Cute Ways to Tell a Girl you Like Her?

First and foremost, you’ve got to show genuine interest in her. She’s going to want to know that you’re looking at what’s inside of her. This makes a girl feel special and separates you from the guys out there who only care about how she looks.

It’s also important that you reveal yourself to her in a way that lets her know that you’re giving her something special, something that you don’t just give out to everyone you meet.

Quick Note

You can also get her a little something special, something that you saw and reminded you of her. If she likes books, find out what books she’s interested in and pick one of them up.

Some girls love getting silly little stuffed animals and others respond well to plants. Simply get a little present for her based on what you know about her.

Also, doing little favors for her without being asked lets her know that you’re interested in her well-being (and also gives her a feeling that you’re actually wanting to take care for her, which is one of the most powerful expressions of affection a girl responds to).

Finally, just sending a simple text that says, “Hey, I was just thinking about you and wanted to see how you were doing” lets her know that she’s on your mind.

What are Some Ways to Tell a Girl You Like Her Without Words?

You know how to tell if a girl likes you without her telling you, right? It works the same way with guys who want a girl to know he likes her. You meet this girl, you get to know her, and you want her to know how you feel about her.

No problem. You’ve got this. When she’s talking to you, you make eye contact. This lets her know that you’re focused on her and no one else.

You give her little physical gestures- touching her hand when she’s sitting next to you and talking, especially if she’s telling you something that you respond to.

Conclusion: What to do Next

If there’s one thing that you should remember, it’s that telling a girl that you like her has far less of an impact than showing her. Actions are extremely important.

She doesn’t just want to hear that you like her - she wants to feel what you’re feeling, she wants to feel secure with you. By performing actions that express your feelings, it helps a girl feel as if the two of you are a couple, even if the words haven’t been said.

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