What To Text A Girl To Get Her Turned On And Wanting To Meet You

What to text a girl to get her turned on graphic with video play button and illustrated woman messagingOk so you want to know how and what to text a girl right?

Not a problem. I’ve had years of experience in this area and have been able to get a number from a girl in the street… text her that day and arrange to meet with her that very same night.

Yep, I know exactly what I’m doing.

Today I’m going to show you the exact same techniques I use to get girls turned on, interested, eager to text back and begging to meet with you… all with my proven text message formula.

But before I do, I want to show you how I went from having ok text game to mastery level text game, this is what I used to do that…

Most guys have absolutely no clue what to text girls!

They use the same old lines and predictable questions that every other sad and pathetic guy uses.

But it’s not their fault, they just haven’t taken the time to see what really works in the real world… so instead follow a pattern the inevitably leads the girls to being bored and not willing to meet with you.

What NOT to text a girl

If you say the wrong thing to a girl in a text message, she’ll usually respond with the following stock messages (if she responds at all):

  • “Hey, I’m not actually looking for anything serious right now, so just wanted to let you know :) x”
  • “Listen, it was nice meeting you but I’m currently seeing someone right now”
  • “I’m really busy with work and stuff at the minute so can’t really get into anything with a guy”

So now we have the stock messages out of the way, here’s what you shouldn’t be sending her…

  • “Hey cutie… Wow, hard day in the office. How’s things with you?”
  • “Hi Sarah, was nice meeting you today. Are you around this evening for a drink?”
  • “Hey, really enjoyed talking to you last night. Want to meet up this weekend?”
  • “Yo, was just thinking about you… are you cool?”

See how boring these messages are? It’s like you’re texting your sister, there’s no sexual vibe or cheekiness going on. So she’s not going to want to text you back.

Oh, something important to add. I get guys asking me things like “what are some sweet things to say to my girlfriend?”. I always give them a list of things NOT to say.

How to tell if she’s not interested

For some annoying reason, men are STUPID at reading signs when it comes to women. Both in person and over text messages. Here’s how to tell if the girl is not into you, which leaves you with two options… 1) you can leave it and go to the next girl or 2) you can use my formula below to re-ignite a fire under her ass!

  1. She responds with 1 liners like “Yeah thanks…”
  2. She doesn’t text you first
  3. She takes quite a while to respond, to every single text
  4. She doesn’t respond at all! (OBVIOUS ONE HERE DUDE!)

What to text a girl (My magic formula)

Ok, so you know what not to say and you also know how to tell if she’s not into you… now I want to show you the secret sauce. The formula I use to get girls turned on and begging me to meet them incredibly fast, all from the first text.

Are you ready?

Cool. Let’s get stuck in then.

QUICK NOTE: Although this formula works… it’s not guaranteed, but nothing ever is. So if a girl doesn’t reply, then your text game skills weren’t strong enough. However if you want to become a black belt ninja at text game… you should watch this video.

Step 1: Open with a funny intriguing message to hook her

You need to grab her attention, make her smile or laugh and make her want to text you back. The funny text opener should always be the first text to send a girl. So you could say something like “How’s my favourite little brat doing today?”.

Step 2: Build comfort

Building comfort and rapport makes her trust you, this is an important part of the interaction because it means she will be willing to meet and potentially have sex with you. You could say something like “Something about u seems to always make me smile”.

Step 3: Build sexual tension

After some back and forth banter, you’ll want to start building sexual tension so she begins thinking about having sex with you. So you could say “I don’t know who you’re boyfriend is…but he’s not spanking you enough!”.

Don’t be afraid to get some sexy pics from her.

And NEVER send her dirty pick up lines before building rapport, otherwise you’ll ruin it.

Step 4: Arrange a meetup, but in a casual way

When the tension is built and you’re exchanging naughty text messages, you want to arrange a meetup so you can get her back to yours. To do this just say “Right then, I think it’s time you put your money where your naughty mouth is. Let’s meet this Friday, 7:30pm outside Starbucks in Oxford Street”.

4 text game elements every text message should have

Photo of a guy holding a phone and texting

Learn how to text girls properly and you’ll never get another flake again.

It’s no surprise that text game NEEDS to be a skillset that you sharpen as you’re learning game these days.

Although you might suck at texting girls, the sad part is… most girls prefer texting than talking on the phone. Especially to a guy they’ve just met.

So you just have to work on your text game until you’re getting positive results.

To make it easier for you, I’m going to give you the 4 elements of any text message that are SOOOOO important, if you want the text to create an impact with a girl.

If your text doesn’t have at least 1 of these elements… STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING and don’t you dare send that message.

I see far too many text casualties from students that makes me feel physically sick with how damn pathetic they are.

Ok, ready? Let’s get on with the elements.

1. Curiosity

When you’re curious about something, you naturally feel compelled to understand more about that thing. You’re fueled by interest and intrigued to quench your curiosity thirst.

Arousing curiosity within a text message is a fantastic way to pretty much guarantee a reply. So you always need to use this element.

Example:

YOU: STOP!!!!
HER: Stop what?
YOU: Thinking about me so much.

2. Humour

Women love a guy who can make them laugh, it’s infectious… it gets them turned on and induces a level of trust that most guys can only hope for.

The strange thing about humour is that it’s universal, so every girl on this planet has the ability to laugh and will be turned on by your sense of humour (I’m hoping you have one).

Don’t go overkill on the humour though, just like in real life… she’ll use you as the jester to make her laugh through text messages. This is what you don’t want.

Example:

I miss you and wanna see you, but this dumb security guard won’t let me in the zoo. Is there any way you can escape?

3. Authority

If you lead in an authoritative manner, women will follow… no question. They are wired to follow a big strong alpha man and they secretly love it (even the feminists).

Showing that you’re a dominant male through texts will convey an attractive quality and will cut through the bullshit.

Example:

YOU: Let’s meet on Tuesday at 8:30 outside the big statue in the park.. we can for a drink from there.
HER: Sounds great, see you then x

4. Confidence

The last and most crucial element is confidence. Without self-confidence, you will convey neediness, look like a wuss and not be attractive to women in the slightest.

Each message should show that you’re a confident (not cocky) man who can make fun of himself, but also stand up for himself and not let others walk over him.

Example:

I just don’t think we should do this anymore… Sometimes you make me feel like I am just a piece of meat.

What Science Says: The Psychology Behind Turn-On Texts

If you want to know what to text a girl to get her turned on, you need to understand what’s happening in her brain—not just her body. Arousal begins with anticipation, and anticipation triggers dopamine, the “reward” chemical responsible for pleasure and desire.

According to licensed therapist Vanessa Marin, teasing messages work because they create emotional and sexual buildup. It’s the fantasy, not the finale, that gets her going. That’s why how to turn on your girlfriend over text isn’t about being filthy—it’s about saying just enough to let her imagination do the rest.

Examples of Texts to Turn a Girl On — Based on Relationship Stage

Not all turn-on texts should sound the same. What works for a girl you just met isn’t what you’d send your girlfriend of two years. Here’s how to tailor your message to build connection and sexual tension at every stage:

New Crush – Keep it playful, suggestive, but safe.
“If you were here right now, I’d probably get in trouble.”
This kind of message stirs curiosity without crossing lines—a smart move when you’re still figuring out how to build sexual tension with a girl over text.

Casual Dating – You can push the boundaries a bit more.
“I can’t stop thinking about your lips… and what they do to me.”
It’s bold, direct, and sexy. The key is confidence, not crudeness.

Long-Term Girlfriend – You’ve earned the right to get real.
“I still get hard thinking about last weekend… round two tonight?”
This is the level where you can send texts to turn a girl on and she’ll meet your energy—fast.

Text Mistakes That Kill Sexual Tension (And How to Fix Them)

Texting a girl should feel like a slow seduction, not a sales pitch. But most guys kill the mood before it even begins. Here are the most common mistakes—and how to fix them.

Too graphic too soon:
“I want to f*** you hard.”
Without context or rapport, this comes off creepy, not sexy.

 Fix it:
“If you knew what I was thinking about you right now, you’d probably blush…”
It still hits the same nerve—but leaves room for imagination.

Low-effort texts:
“wyd” or “Hey”
These are dry, forgettable, and guaranteed to kill the vibe.

Fix it:
“I had a dream about you last night. Wanna know what happened?”
Now she’s curious—and curiosity is foreplay.

To master what to text a girl to get her turned on, every message should feel intentional, not lazy or forced.

How to Build Sexual Tension with a Girl Over Text Without Going Crude

Learning how to build sexual tension with a girl over text is more about pacing than pushing. You want to stir emotion, not startle her.

Try these tension-building tactics:

Implied visuals:
Instead of saying what you’d do to her, say, “If you were in my bed right now, I’d have a hard time behaving…” Let her mind fill in the blanks.

Layer your messages:
Start light (“You’re trouble… I like it”) then build heat over time.

Timing matters:
Texts hit different after dark. A message at 11pm saying, “You just popped into my head… and now I’m wide awake” is way more effective than the same thing at 2pm.

This is the art of texts to turn a girl on—you lead her into desire, one suggestive word at a time.

Expert Take: What Dating Coaches and Therapists Recommend

Even the best players take cues from pros. And when it comes to getting a girl turned on over text, the smartest move is understanding the psychology behind her responses.

Dr. Emily Morse, host of the Sex with Emily podcast, explains:

“Sexual tension builds strongest when your message taps into both emotional and physical connection. Women need to feel safe and desired—not objectified.”

That’s why how to turn on your girlfriend over text starts with emotional rapport. Dating coach Matthew Hussey adds that mutual vibe-checking is key. He recommends watching how she mirrors your energy: “If she teases back, you’re greenlit. If not, slow down and recalibrate.”

This isn’t guesswork—it’s game backed by insight.

Frequently Asked Questions

How to rizz a girl up over text?

To rizz a girl up over text, start with playful confidence and light teasing that grabs her attention. Use charm, not cheesy pickup lines—something like “You’re trouble… but the kind I’d risk everything for” builds intrigue and opens the door for flirtation.

How to get a girl hooked on you through text?

Keep her hooked by mixing curiosity, humor, and emotional connection. Instead of generic messages, send something unique like, “Every time my phone buzzes, I hope it’s you. Weird or kinda hot?”

How do I turn someone on over text?

To turn someone on over text, build slow sexual tension through implied visuals and suggestive phrases. Think: “If you were here right now, I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands to myself”—a classic example of what to text a girl to get her turned on.

How to re-attract her through text?

Re-attract her by reigniting emotional connection and sparking curiosity. Text her something like, “I was just remembering that look you gave me… made me forget what I was saying. Still dangerous, huh?”

How do I turn her on with text?

Use flirtatious confidence and seductive pacing. Texts like “You looked way too good last night… now I’m stuck thinking about it” are effective ways to turn on your girlfriend over text without being crude.

How to tell a girl she’s hot over text?

Be direct, but tasteful. Try: “I saw your latest pic… and damn, you’ve got me distracted in the best way.” Compliments like this boost attraction while keeping it sexy and respectful.

Final thoughts on what to text a girl

That’s it! Now you don’t need to ponder about things to text girls because you have my formula. 4 steps and she’ll be willing to meet you wherever you are and will be eager to get back to yours.

IMPORTANT: If you’re serious about becoming a master at texting girls, then you should watch this short video… it will blow you away.

Do you have any rules for texting girls that you follow?


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Comments

  1. I’m not gonna lie. At first I was skeptical about trying this, but I’m sure glad I did. I have not 1 but 2 girls now that are younger and sexier than my previous girlfriend and both think I’m mad funny and in love with me.

  2. Bashar alamin says

    The girl I want to talk with, i have only met her one week ago. I liked her, i think she gets all what i love to see in a girl. I just want you to help me, tomorrow maybe will be the last day i’ll see her, i want to ask her about her phone number, and to be closer to her, how could that happen?

  3. I been on and off “talking to” a guy for a couple years he’s also a friend but I know he’s a player. It’s fun having him as an option and vice versa but he sent me the same txt word for word that he sent me 4 months ago saying “I think I’ve wanted you since the moment I laid eyes on you but never really got a chance so I settle for this. I don’t think I’ve ever been this naturally attached to somebody in my life. I’m drawn to you like a fucking magnet”. I called him on it playfully not wanting to ruin having him as an option/friend and he says “that’s why I saved it lol it still applies” but I’m nearly convinced he unknowingly reused a txt he’s used on multiple chicks and tried to change topics. What do you think? Should I invest less interest into him incase he’s playing me like he plays the chicks he picks up in bars and whatever or should I say screw it whatever and keep talking to him like nothing’s anything? im interested atleast in your opinion since you e clearly given the “game” some thought. Lol

  4. I met this girl on fb and she’s flying down for my birthday on February 20. What things do I need to say to her in text that’s intriguing and makes her want to have sex with me. I like her a lot and my objective is to make her crazy about me. Do I not text her as often or what. I do text her everyday but I am ready now to take it to the next level. She said she’s very interested in me but I want her to be crazy about me. Help me lol

  5. Hi Mate!
    I was wondering, And what shell I text guy to make him want me in this way. Nothing serious, just fun ?

  6. Hi Rich
    Just read your blog on how to txt women and have a question for you. I have been emailing this girl for a while now and we get on really well. We have come to the point were we have exchanged our sexual desires and fantasies, and she tells me she thinks about have sex with me every day. But when I comes down to arranging to meet she is either always to busy or she makes excuses a few days before we are meant to meet and pulls out.
    What can I do to get around this and actually get her to go through with meetings?

    Regards
    Kevin

    • Perhaps she’s just a little insecure. Build more comfort and make her feel that you’re not going to meet her up just for the sex (although you are) (:
      I’ve been through this, and that’s what I did exactly to make it work.

    • Kevin – she’s probably a man!

    • I agree with Rod. And I ‘d like to ad something to it. Tell her about a story or two that puts you on a fucking mountain. DHV and massive comfort building is critical at this point. Or Dave here could be right lol

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