Coffee Shop Game: How To Pick Up Girls In Coffee Shops… This Works 100% Every Time

Give me any coffee shop in any city and 5 minutes on the clock and I will walk out with a number from a hottie… guaranteed… everytime.

Yep, it’s that time people.

I’m going to show you how to pick up girls in coffee shops using a surefire system I’ve been using for a few years now.

Unlike an office environment, coffee shops are natural, easy to pull off and works 100% of the time (well at least for me it does).

Don’t get me wrong, I actually consider myself more of a night game person, I’m very much in my element there. I know how to game the clubs, seek out the high networth cool guys, attract the most beautiful women and just dominate the venue.

BUT, I’m starting to really like the whole coffe shop pickup thing.

I mean there are no annoying guys looking for trouble, horrible bitchy girls just eager for free drinks, ugly drunk girls hanging onto you like a sexual disease, sweaty venues that you can’t move in… the list goes on.

You see with coffee shops, it’s like a whole other game.

Quick tip: If you want to get good at picking up women, then I strongly suggest you check this out.

Why are coffee shops great for meeting women?

  • It’s a low pressure environment so women won’t have their guard up ready to reject you.
  • Coffee shops attract every type of woman you can imagine.
  • You can do a quick pickup which can last a couple of minutes to a long pickup which can last for 30 minutes or longer.
  • You don’t have to worry about bitchy cockblocks or douchey male friends, because the girls are usually on their own.
  • It’s cheap. You don’t need to fork out on booze, just a cup of the brown stuff.

So now you know why coffee shops are great for picking up women and running PUA day game, let’s get into the different types of women you can expect to find in them.

5 types of girls you can pick up in coffee shops

  • The worker – The cute barista (there’s always one) who is bored out of her mind and loves flirting with cute guys.
  • Busy office girl on the go – She’s usually in a rush, but you still have a minute or so to close the deal before her coffee is ready.
  • The tourist – Usually chilling with her holiday buddies or on her own. Great to talk to and super easy to open.
  • The student – In study mode reading, writing and getting her work done. Very easy to open and doesn’t really want to study that hard if she’s come to a coffee shop.
  • The waiter (she’s waiting for someone) – The only risky one of the bunch, because you don’t know who she’s waiting for… could be a boyfriend etc.

So that’s the types down, now we want to actually put the wheels in motion and learn the system. Ready? Cool, let’s go!

The “how to pick up girls in coffee shops” fool-proof system

So this is it big man, my system for meeting and picking up women in any coffee shop. I’ve used this in multiple cities all over the world and I’ve NEVER had one single rejection or flake.

The reason why is because I observe my environment first and see which types of girls are likely to be open to talking and which aren’t.

Anyways, here’s the system…

1. Make sure you pick busy coffee shops

Quiet coffee shops are fine, but you don’t have much to work with if there are no hot girls in there. So I always go for the tourist traps or coffee shops in the centre of town. That way you have a lot more to work with and the foot traffic is high.

2. Take note of your surroundings (observe everything)

The more you do this the easier it will become to seek out the girls who are ripe for picking up. But from the moment you walk in the door.

Take note of every girl… are they with a guy? Are they in groups? If they are on their own, are they reading a book? Are they studying or working on a macbook? Do they look bored? Are they giving you any IOI’s?

I always watch out for the IOI’s as soon as I walk in, if I get any then I will 100% act on them. These sets are the most solid when it comes to picking up, because they’ve already shown interest in you.

3. Approach and open her (say anything)

Once you’ve selected the girl you want to approach, you can do it in two different ways. The first is to use the natural opener and the second is to use the observational opener.

Before you do either, you need to approach her in a non-aggressive way. So you can either crouch down next to the table/seat or just bend over slightly if she’s sitting down so she can hear you. This will give off a non-threatening friendly vibe.

Here’s the natural opener:

Go over to her and simply say “Excuse me… I just saw you from over there and wanted to come over and say hi, because I think you’re very cute :)”

Natural right? Yep, this is PERFECT for coffee shop game. Straightforward, direct and to the point my friend.

Here’s the observational opener:

Go over and say “Excuse me, sorry to bother you but I just noticed you’re reading “blah blah”… I have to ask, are you enjoying it? Because I found it so hard to get into”.

The observational opener takes practice because you need to be a good observer, but once you nail it, it’s SOOOO easy to use and you’ll begin to notice TONS of things that you can use to open with.

4. Build initial neutral rapport

If she responds well to the opener, then you need to start the initial rapport building stage which basically means kicking off the attraction and building comfort.

Ask her if you can sit down quickly because you need to meet some friends or get back to work. Then when she says yes, here’s how you carry on the convo.

Carrying on from the natural opener:

Move straight into guessing things about her… her looks, job, style of character etc. This may be slow to begin with, but stick with it she will break and answer.

Carrying on from the observational opener:

Now you have something to talk about you can carry on talking about the same topic (in the example above it was her book) or you can move onto a related topic to keep it flowing.

5. Drop the hook (or multiple hooks)

Ok so the rapport is in full swing, she’s giving you IOI’s, talking and you feel that the interaction is going well. It’s now time to drop a few hooks, so that you can see whether she’s really into you or just being polite.

To do this you need to bring up topics that will encourage her to ask you questions, once she does this then you’re in and you can move onto connecting more.

So with the book example, I could say “Yeah, I actually met the author last yeah randomly in a bar in Tokyo, was crazy…”.

If you were using the natural opener, then you just need to talk more about things you might have in common that you can relate too. Like “Oh cool, you’re Brazilian, I was thinking of heading out to Rio this year actually…”.

If she doesn’t initiate with the questions, that’s fine. Just keep ploughing until she does.

6. Connect and break rapport

Let’s say the conversation is going amazing, she’s giving you IOI’s, asking you questions and her body language is completely focused on you. Now what? Well you need to develop that spark… that attraction, which is going to make her feel drawn to you.

For this to happen you need to “break rapport” with her. So if she says something like “Yeah, I love that book…” OR something else she might love, you say “Aahhh seriously? No way, that’s not cool… I couldn’t stand that book it was terrible”.

Then she will defend whatever you don’t like, which is her working for your attention and approval. If she does this, you’re home and dry fella.

7. Make your excuses to leave

Don’t sit there too long, you need to get going so that you leave the interaction on a high note and she wants to see you again. Simply say “Damn, I need to meet my friends, I’m late… listen we should meet up again when you’re free…”.

To which she will say “Yeah we should”.

8. Close her

With that said you need to close. Now I always go for the number close, but I’ve also found that Facebook is a great way to close in coffee shops and it can actually even be better, because it’s less pressure and she can see your profile which gives you a better chance to grab her with the social proofed pics :)

That’s it dude! The system in full.

Do’s and don’t of coffee shop game

  • Do open a girl in EVERY coffee shop you go into – Why? Because it’s great practice and before you know it, you’ll have a string of women you can call at any time… it’s called options bro!
  • Don’t approach a set unless you’re advanced enough – I would wait until you’re good enough before approaching a set of women or even a mixed set. I’ve done it a couple of times and you need to be on top of your game to pull it off.
  • Don’t be sexual, save that for later – It’s not the time or place to be sexual, so keep the conversation neutral.
  • Don’t be creepy, read her signals – There’s a difference between being persistent and just creeping her out. If she’s obviously not into you, then take the hint and leave dude.

The idea here is to tap into the constant stream of hotties that frequent coffee shops, it’s far easier than you think and there are no shortage of them, so you’re all set.

Now get out there and go buy a vanilla bullshit, or whatever you drink!

As always, leave your comments and ideas below…

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  1. Hey richard, great tips! Im from brazil and girls here are very opened and friendly. Here is my small problem with it, it seems that the hottest women ( the kind of brazilian girls i like) are inside somekind of strong social circle, surrounded by other hot women and goodlooking guys and to get into them you really gotta become into that structure, belonging to the group, otherwise the access is too complicated to them. Small exemple, they know each other by last names, gives best private parties… It feels like some consanostra..

    Do you have any tip how to break this strongs social structures and getting access to them?

  2. hey.. im from india.. and here i dnt think you would find girls that are so open.. and besides im shy too.. and approaching a girl like this will do make me uncomfortable.. im going to visit some beaches this june ( Goa ).. and i need help to hook up with girls there

  3. I’m not sure about going to her and telling her shes cute..I feel that is pretty bold and a bit too advanced. Wouldn’t that make her a bit uncomfortable (unless you are brad pitt). The fact that you went over to her is enough to let her know that you like her.. Ive had some a guy come up to me before and started talking to me and I assumed he was gay and liked me.

  4. I agree with this post about 60%. But BSing her in the middle that you like the same things she does (when you don’t necessarily)– ( wtf is “hooks”? ) is not a good idea and could haunt you very quickly.

    • “hooks” is something you’d know if you read this site more. It’s simply PUA jargon, it’s a term made up to shorten having to explain the phenomenon over and over. Pretty much like every other word in the world.

      Having things in common with a girl is crucial. It’s not lying, it’s just bending the truth a little, if you can find genuine commonalities all the better..

      If you know what you’re doing, nothing is going to “haunt” you, sounds like you could stand to read a few more of these articles, I guarantee Rich knows what he’s talking about more than you.. if you don’t agree with 40% of this article, you’re mistaken

  5. Hi Rich and fellow readers – #5 on dropping hooks, and the separate article on hooks seem very unclear, still don’t know what they are. can anybody clearly explain them?

  6. Hey Rich

    First things first….LENGEND!

    Secondly, how would you go about picking up the waitress in the coffee shop. There’s a right cutie in my local one but I’m always conscious of the fact that she’s working and shouldn’t be giving her Facebook out to costumers.

    Cheers buddy

  7. Hey Rich,

    did you ever work (successfully!) with older guys (like in their 50ies – after all we share the same DNA, right) who want to get hot girls in their twenties?

    • I think you’d have to be on your game and approach the situation a little differently, but nothing is impossible :) I’d suggest simply pretending like it’s a non-issue and follow Rich’s ideas. Then maybe throw something in after you’ve build initial rapport, like, “even though I’m a little older, I still kinda feel like I’m in my twenties, you know?” and give examples. Maybe if she follows that lead with a comment on the same topic, pepper in something about how your last long term relationship was with a woman much younger than you. But don’t make a long conversation out of it, because then you’ll seem insecure about the age difference. Just an idea…

      • The non-issue is absolutely that!- If you think your age is an issue, don’t bring it up. If you think you don’t have enough money- don’t bring it up, etc. The only issues are the ones you bring up- as a man you have everything under control ( unless you bring it up) — woman will follow your cue- raise a doubt about yourself and they will have doubts about you

        • I carry a piece of paper with hand written affirmations. As far as age goes (I am 59) I have written ‘Age has nothing to do with it. End of conversation. Move on.’ This is all I need to remind myself that any conversations I might be having with myself about age are going to be unproductive. Thinking your too old is a limiting belief. The way to get over it is to get out there and prove that age doesn’t matter.

  8. Is it really a good idea to start the opener with “Excuse me…” or “sorry…”? If you are the confident alpha male, why would you say those things?

    So the natural opener could be: “Hi, I just saw you from over there and wanted to come over and say hi, because I think you’re very cute :)”

    • PUA Training says

      Yes. Beginners think that the words you say are more important than they way you say them or how you convey them. But in actual fact you can say pretty much anything, as long as you say it with enough confidence, you can say “excuse me” or “sorry” in a way that doesn’t sound needy or pathetic.

      • Yes, saying ‘sorry’ and ‘excuse me’ in a confident way is socially intelligent. It shows you have good social skills.

  9. Introverted Playboy says

    I’ve had a lot of success in coffee shops. They are really great spots to meet girls. The girls have their guard down, and it’s easy to get their attention, and also much easier to have a genuine conversation and get to know her than in most night game scenarios.

    It’s also possible to bounce her and do instant dates from the coffee shop, similar to many other daygame scenarios. So if the girl seems into you, and you have some time to spare, just throw it out there “I’m going to get a bite to eat nearby, want to come?” You can’t lose. If she says yes, boom, done. If she says no, no problem, you already have her number, so just leave.

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